Posts by safe4kids

14

Motivated by Pure Love

by Farkel in

jw
friends

love and tolerance for other's religious beliefs:.

" (the watchtower, 7/1 1967, pp.

" (the watchtower, 12/1 1961, pp.

You know, I really appreciate your posts. I guess being raised a JW, I was so innured to the violence and blood lust the literature exhibited that I never noticed it. But in your post, it screams loud and clear. I can't believe that I ever bought into wholesale slaughter like that; I can't believe that all those years I wasn't struck with horror every time I read or heard stuff like what was in your post. Thanks for the reality check!

To outnfree: Don't beat yourself up, okay? The important thing is that you're out, your children are out, and you have the opportunity to show them your love. I am a parent too, and although my children are still pretty young, I still put them through hell for a few years. But children are incredibly adaptable and forgiving; please don't let the past overshadow your present. What will matter most to your children is how you are in the here and now and in the future. And I can't help but think that at least these early experiences with a destructive religion will keep my kids from going anywhere near another cult!!! So maybe the JWs did "protect" my kids...just not the way they imagine!!!

Safe

<"A woman without a man is like a fish without a bicycle.">

11

To Mommy - re: New Light

by Farkel in

jw
friends

mommy,.

in another thread you stated to me,.

: my mother, when we spoke said that she beleives the org should have new information come out(new light brighter and brighter).

safe4kids

Hey Farkel!
Just wanted to tell you how impressed I was with your arguments. Let's see, you had repetition for emphasis, um, gee that's the only one I can remember-I must be getting better!!!
Honestly, though, I love to read your posts. They are so logical and succinct...and always make me laugh at some point!

Safe

<"A woman without a man is like a fish without a bicycle.">

22

By Their Fruits You Will Know Them

by SanFranciscoJim in

jw
friends

hi folks..... i just received this absolutely delightful email this morning:.

from: [email protected].

to: [email protected].

safe4kids

Hi Jim,
I'm a newbie on this board (I'm sure you couldn't tell :)) but I wanted to respond to your post and join with others in saying that I'm glad you don't let those types of hate messages mess with your head. One thing about leaving the "society" that I will be eternally grateful for is that I now have the ability to open my mind and my heart to other people. You know, for most of my life as a JW, I was such a narrow minded, prejudiced BITCH that I was completely closed off to the beauty, love, and outstanding variety of the world around me....I'm happy to say that is NO MORE! :)
I'll echo what Slayer said, consider the source...it saddens me to think that once upon a time I had a similar mindset - although, I was a much better speller!!!

Hugs,
Safe

<"A woman without a man is like a fish without a bicycle.">

32

Need to vent... advice is welcome

by SlayerLayer in

jw
friends

when i was 13, all of the other kids in my congregation were taking home school, getting them out of the "bad association" in public school.

they talked me into it too.. of course, at 13 trying to get me to actually do the schooling was a feat that no one could master.. i worked for a brother in the cong.

full time, and never finished the schooling.. so...flash forward.

safe4kids

Hey Slayer dude! First, I just have to tell you that I love your signature...I laughed my a$$ off the first time I read it. Secondly, let me congratulate you on your new job. Funny how things work themselves out, isn't it?
Can you stand to hear one more "higher education" story? I'm 35 years old, a divorced mom with two young children, who dropped out of high school after 10th grade. I got my GED years ago but had given up hope of ever going to college. Well, guess what? A week ago last Friday, I graduated with honors from the local community college and received my AA degree. And I've been accepted to the university in Tampa, Florida for the fall semester. You know, sometimes I think about how old I'll be when I finally get my masters degree...but then I think, with any luck, I'm going to be that old anyway, may as well have a degree to go along with my advanced years! My point, and I know it's been made over and over already, is that it can be done. Our lives of servitude and wasted sacrifice to the borg do not have to dog us forever...
There's a song I love by Edwin McCain about a guy who lost his youth due to a cruel mother (she had him locked up). Anyway, in the song he says: "I'm gonna grab this world by the horns, and learn how to live"...That's how I feel. I lost my youth to a sick, dysfunctional family and religion...I refuse to give them any more of my life. Grab the world by the horns, man...you can be whatever you want to be...
Hugs,
Safe

<"A woman without a man is like a fish without a bicycle.">

2

just needed to share

by jurs in

jw
friends

i cant the events of the past few weeks.

a brief summary for those who don't know.

i've been a jw 7 years .

safe4kids

Hi Jurs....thanks for sharing. I can relate to the pain that you feel. I was a JW for about 30 of my 35 years. Towards the end, I became best friends with an elder's wife who it turned out was an alcoholic. Between me and her hubby, we mentioned to get her some help for awhile but sadly it didn't seem to do too much good-except for the fact that it did help her leave a twisted, sick religion! She was df'd and, last I talked to her, actually quite happy. Anyway, the long and the short of this is that while helping her battle her disease, I discovered that I too was an alkie...I've been sober now for just shy of 5 years....I did NOT receive any help whatsoever from the "brothers" in the congregation with my drinking problem. What you said in your post is so true, disfellowshipping does NOT help people...your friend is ill, not bad. She needs help, not moralizing sermons. Maybe, if you get the opportunity, you can steer her towards AA or therapy. Any good therapist will pick up on the drinking behavior, although, if she was arrested on a DUI charge, she may be forced into therapy, AA, or some other type of treatment. My message to you, dear JURS, is that you have not caused or contributed to your friend's problem and pain...and you can't cure it. It sounds to me like you are in a lot of pain yourself and I urge you to take care of yourself. It sounds like you've taken a gigantic healthy step in that direction by leaving the borg. I know this takes a lot of courage (I'm a DA'er myself!); give yourself a huge pat on the back and a hug from me.
Please hang in there...the ride keeps getting better and better....

A woman without a man is like a fish without a bicycle.

21

Sisters with unbelieving Mates

by slipnslidemaster in

jw
friends

i asked this in one of the threads ( http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/forum/thread.asp?id=5335) but i would like to explore it further.. am i the only one to think this or did it seem like the sisters with unbelieving mates and children seemed to be "tolerated" or marginalized?

they never seemed to be "full" witnesses to anybody in the congregation?.

my name is slipnslideius masterus: commander of the armies of the north, general of the felix legions, loyal servant to the true emperor, marcus aurelius...

safe4kids

Patio,
I agree with you that the organizational structure is the true culprit. The individual "sheep" are just doing what they're told...or not doing what they're not told. I'm very glad that I got out while my children were still young. They only have very vague memories of those "boring" meetings! And they don't remember field service at all! :-) They have been able to have so many experiences that were denied me as a "raised in the Truth" person and I feel very strongly that they have benefited a great deal from these experiences. They don't view every person they meet with suspicion and distrust. And they don't wake up at night with bad dreams of Armageddon. They aren't poisoned with that swill as so many of us were.
Sorry to get off the subject here....I am just very grateful to be out.

Safe

3

Need a laugh??

by jezebel influence in

jw
friends

check this out!

cool http://www.americangreetings.com/fun/swunder.pd?m=p&p=2010498.

jez

safe4kids

Thanks for the link Jez...very funny....it reminded me of something....can't quite put my finger on it...some nightmare from my past.....

21

Sisters with unbelieving Mates

by slipnslidemaster in

jw
friends

i asked this in one of the threads ( http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/forum/thread.asp?id=5335) but i would like to explore it further.. am i the only one to think this or did it seem like the sisters with unbelieving mates and children seemed to be "tolerated" or marginalized?

they never seemed to be "full" witnesses to anybody in the congregation?.

my name is slipnslideius masterus: commander of the armies of the north, general of the felix legions, loyal servant to the true emperor, marcus aurelius...

safe4kids

I was married to an ubelieving mate while a Witness and I had two children. We were rarely invited anywhere; it was almost like we didn't exist to most of the families in the congregation. In fact, the only invitations I received outside of family invites were from one elder and his family whom I had gotten close to - I was buds with his wife. Other than that, there was a lot of lip service paid to looking out for the "widows and orphans" but this "widow" can tell you, it WAS only lip service. After assemblies, it was common in our area for the bros and sisters to go somewhere afterward for dinner...I do not recall a SINGLE invitation. BUT my pervert, pedophiliac brother (the pioneer) was chatted up by almost every elder and had dinner with the CO everytime he was in town. Of course, that may have been due to the fact that he contributed generously to said CO....
Screw 'em

Safe

5

Done out of love...

by Introspection in

jw
friends

i wanted to say a few words about the whole theist vs. atheist kind of arguments here, and suggest another way of looking at it which may put things into perspective.. i think as ex-jws none of us want to see others fall into that same trap again, and depending on our perspective we'd want others to have the benefit of our experience.

honestly, i don't know if i fit under either category, but i do believe in "something beyond.

" all the same, i think often my atheist brothers (which is not to exclude those who are theists) and sisters say the things they do out of love.

safe4kids

Hey Intro, I appreciate your comments. If there is one thing I came out of the borg determined to do, that was to try to be open minded as much as possible. The borg trains us to believe that we know everything and that only one right answer is possible. Therefore, I try so hard now not to close my mind to other's beliefs, however repellent they may be to me (I'm speaking of religious and spiritual beliefs here). Never again do I want to be the type of person who is SURE they have all the answers. After all, once you're an "expert" on a subject, the learning process is derailed. For me, I never again want anything to do with any organization that insists on telling me what to think and feel or that tries to control me with fear and fear-based manipulation. What's out there? I have no idea but I feel very strongly that each individual has the right to search out answers and belief systems for themselves.

Have a good one,
Safe

31

Do You Fear Death?

by think41self in

jw
friends

i am very interested to know how all of you feel about the subject of death and the future.

do you fear death?

what do you think are the possibilities for the future?.

safe4kids

Hey Think,
Great question. I have to agree with your statements...as a JW, I was ALWAYS worried about dying. I never felt good enought, worthy enough. Never felt that I could do enough to get in Jehovah's good graces. I even remember times that I thought, gee I hope I die right now because I feel pretty good about myself. If I don't die until tomorrow, I might screw things up too bad to have any hope. Pretty depressing huh? But now that I'm out, I don't worry about it so much anymore. Who knows what's out there? I don't. So why worry?