My suggestion would be to start looking around for social groups that do activities you enjoy, things you can do on the evenings your wife enjoys her friends' company. You can try out any number of things without making a pact with them to go every single week - if you like running or cycling or graphic novels or whatever, you can probably find people who share your interests. Try out a variety of activities so you aren't too deeply involved in the social dynamics of each group until you find a group or individuals who don't irritate you too much.
I don't think it's necessary to "break up" with the old dude. You don't get along with him, he sounds boorish and kind of selfish to have conversations that revolve around him and his day to day ablutions. Hopefully he's not texting you or cyberstalking you to keep tabs on you. ;) Somehow I doubt it, and somehow I don't think he'll be crushed... he'll likely glom onto the next tag-along husband that shows up.
I enjoy my co-workers' company at work, but knowing the kind of gossip they generate, I rarely socialize with them. Instead, I have a regular cooking class and a crafting group. Both of those activities are more social and superficial "acquaintance" level relationships, but I'm fine with that. I'm pretty private and prefer socializing around a common interest rather than deep philosophical or probing my psyche type conversations. I save that kind of stuff for y'all on JWN, where I can be somewhat anonymous. :)
Also, maybe you and your wife need to have a regular date night every week to go for dinner and a movie, or some other thing you can enjoy together, so that you stay connected and don't end up begrudging each other your nights out.
