My brother has been in and out of this ROT at least five times. Always to be reinstated. I asked him once, the one day he actually took a trip to see me, "why"? He said basically to keep HIS family (somehow he and most forget that HIS family IS MY family too) together; as not to cause problems. Yet he stated he does not subscribe to them in anyway. At that time, I did not know what I now know.
Think I'll call him and confirm his actual number of dfments and "such". I usually do on his birthday, which is closely followed by mine, which is soon to be upon both of us. Not to mention my dfment date of summer '77. Ha, he always asks why I call on his birthday, is it out of spite? I say, it is because that is the day I think about you most. Simple.
You know, just before I went to hit submit, I had a "recall" (kind of nervous telling this).
My mom was seriously near dfment herself in the timezone that I started seriously wanting out. She had started dating a uy who was studying. They were attreacted to each other. He had a young son my mom was drawn to. She wanted to be with a man too. Always had. She never had a father around EITHER. She was always on the hunt, it seemed. You see, this is what drew her in into the ROT in the first place...a man. So, it was a pattern, and always has been by looking back on our life now, I see how badly she was searching for "settement". (something i did not inherit from her...whew)Well, these men somehow became her lifesavers, not so much the org. Not yet, anyway. It wasn't until later that her total devotion went to "jehovah and his organization"; her words, not mine.
Re: the near dfment, I was elated at the actual possibilty of her being kicked out. I had secretly always wanted out ever since day one. My baptism was a "snare/rackett". I did it strictly out of F.E.A.R. to be "whole" again, AS PROMISED BY NWT/WTBTS LITERATURE.
Well of course, she WAS NOT dfed, and no, I do not know why she nearly was to begin with; but i intend on finding out soon, as part of therapy. Those days are sketchy and laced with a lot of resentments and confusion between both of us. I have no idea what the elders (one of who she soon married after HE dfed me) were telling her about my "renigment*" to my baptism into the "s/r". Oh how I wish that day had been different. Who knows where her life with us would have lead her. Maybe down a slow road, maybe down a fast one.
Ido know now, that with what I went thru with the shunning process from her and all I had known in the congregation, I do not wish this for her. She lives for that organization. She is totally devoted. And she has labeled me recently as....
"VERY APOSTATE" and refuses to speak to me now thinking I am going to sue her elder-dfing husband and his presiding overseer who-sat-on-my-judicialmeeting-as-then-elder. So be it!
sKally
