Posts by Swan

Yes, it hurts so much. Sometimes I think I am over it, but then it comes back, all of the pain. Am I not the same person they onced loved? My basic personality has not changed. I am still the same loving, caring individual they knew. Only my beliefs have changed. Why should that be a reason to shun?

I know how you must feel because I have felt the same. I am so sorry for the pain you have suffered at their hands. Even after we have left they have found a way to control us. They control us with this pain. They keep us afraid of making contact with each other with the "apostate" label. They keep us in the dark about who is in and who is out and we have had no way to contact each other after we left (prior to the Internet). They control us because we are different from other people we meet out there and who just don't understand what we have been through.

But through this board, our words, our feelings expressed here, and other venues like this board, we are slowly taking back control of our lives. We are here for the newbies, but we are here for each other too, because the pain isn't something you can just turn off.

My deepest sympathies for your pain and your loss.

Tammy

23

Upcoming Holidays- Celebrating in Secret

by Vitameatavegamin in

jw
friends

with autumn in the air, my thoughts start turning to the holidays ahead.

are any of you doing christmas or thanksgiving?.

i do, but i have to be so careful, incase any jw family would happen to drop by.

Swan

Granny Linda;

I'm glad I made you laugh! I find humor is a very good thing when you are dealing with the realities of life as a former JW.

Tammy

49

could your son be gay???

by searchfothetruth in

jw
friends

how would you react if doctors come up with a test that could determine if your son would turn out to be gay when he grows up?

how would you react?

i personally, having two young sons myself, would not want to know.

Swan

That's all right B.

It can be a very emotional subject. I would also rather not know, but if I were to be told, I agree with larc about just keeping it to myself and to let the child figure it out. Come to think of it, we rather suspected that our one grandaughter was gay long before she told anyone. We just let her figure it out for herself. Gave her a lot of love and reassurance in the meantime. It seems to work out best that way.

All in all, I think people here have tended to respond very well to the subject. There are always falacies and misconceptions involved, but for a bunch of people who were force fed anti-gay rhetoric from the WT for years, I think they are doing surprisingly well. Let's not forget that it was the WTBTS who banned oral and anal sex within marital relations because they were too close to gay sex for their homophobic little GB minds. And disco music was out too because gay people first started it. The WTBTS was and is incredibly homophobic, so the fact that these people here are willing to love and accept their gay children is pretty significant. When faced with the actual situation, I find that most parents get educated on the subject very quickly.

Tammy

49

could your son be gay???

by searchfothetruth in

jw
friends

how would you react if doctors come up with a test that could determine if your son would turn out to be gay when he grows up?

how would you react?

i personally, having two young sons myself, would not want to know.

Swan

Dear Bgurltryal,

I didn't mean to imply that they were lepers. To us they are not lepers. They are our grandchildren first and foremost. We accept them for who they are no matter who they are. I don't love my straight grandchildren any less than I do my homosexual grandchildren. I love them all the same. I think you missed the full context of my quote. I am restoring it here:

I have two step granddaughters that are gay. We love them as we love all of our grandchildren. How they got that way is immaterial. They just are. So we just accept them and their partners. Life is too short for them to be miserable (and us too).

This means that we accept them for who they, regardless of sexual orientation. I don't care how they got that way. The important thing is to never quit loving them.

If there were a test, it wouldn't bother me a bit, because we wouldn't change a thing. Do we treat them all differently? Yes, because they are all different. Our lesbian granddaughter was my husband's best man at our wedding ceremony. Her sisters had other roles in the ceremony. We have taken her to the gay pride parade. Her heterosexual sisters didn't want to go. We took one of her sisters for a makeover for her 16th birthday. Her lesbian sister could care less. We love the diversity that all of our grandchildren add to our lives. I don't know how I can make this any plainer. Gay, bi, straight, queer, it makes no difference in the love we show, but it does make them all unique individuals who are all treated as individuals.

Tammy

30

HI! This site is a blast!

by doorboy00 in

jw
friends

i just wanted to say that i'm having a blast reading all the posts.

i stumbled upon this site because i was curious to see what the jehovah's witnesses have to say about september 11th and instead i've been laughing at the top ten's and such.

i was priveleged?

Swan

Circus Assembly

D'strict Overseer

Kingdumb Halls

Circuit Overseers Wife (Acronym COW)

The Big A

The Borganization

49

could your son be gay???

by searchfothetruth in

jw
friends

how would you react if doctors come up with a test that could determine if your son would turn out to be gay when he grows up?

how would you react?

i personally, having two young sons myself, would not want to know.

Swan

There is only one true test for gayness in men. If they like their nipples sucked, they are gay or about to turn gay. It's a proven fact.

LOL @ LB! You nut! You made my day!

23

Upcoming Holidays- Celebrating in Secret

by Vitameatavegamin in

jw
friends

with autumn in the air, my thoughts start turning to the holidays ahead.

are any of you doing christmas or thanksgiving?.

i do, but i have to be so careful, incase any jw family would happen to drop by.

Swan

Dear Vita,

We actually discussed this subject at the xJW Meetup tonight. Someone mentioned that they put up all sorts of decorations because to not do so was to admit that the JWs were still in control. I thought that was a good point, so I thought I would share it. Of course, you have to balance that with what you are risking. Good luck to you whatever your decision.

Tammy

P.S. Or you could just claim you were confused because the UN has Christmas lights and Trick-or-Treat for Unicef and you heard that the JWs had joined the UN. Or you could say, oh, I thought that we could celebrate in bits and pieces, but not as a whole, like blood transfusions. Or, how about, I thought It was okay after the end of the 20th century. Or spell out the number 1914 in lights so you can say you were just getting your time in.

8

Portland Television Reports On SilentLambs March

by ErieGuy in

with all the media webpages that have been posted since thursday, i'm not sure whether this has been posted or not, so .... http://www.koin.com/webnews/20022/20020906_jwabuse.shtml.

.

edited by - erieguy on 7 september 2002 17:50:39.

Swan

Thank you ErieGuy. I know of three cases here in Oregon in two different congregations I was involved in. Hopefully the victims will see this and know some things are starting to get done to expose this problem.

Tammy

28

Humanitarian assistance

by garybuss in

jw
friends

"discretion should be used in determining what, if any, assistance might be given on a humanitarian basis to those not having a good standing in the congregation.

("pay attention to yourselves and to all the flock" wtb&ts 1991 p. 22).

i was associated with the watch tower bible and tract society of new york and pennsylvania, also known as, jehovah's witnesses.

Swan

It reminds me of the good Samaritan story the JWs are so fond of telling. Only this time Max and the Sunshine Grocery Store were the "worldly" Samaritans. The JWs played the role of Pharisees. Unfortunately I have seen this happen too often. The "worldly" people I have known since leaving the JWs were kinder and more generous than most JWs I knew. Why is that? I don't know.

I often took the time to visit those who were sick in the hospital. I was told I couldn't count the time. I knew I couldn't count the time, but I felt it was something that I needed to do for them. I just didn't understand why more JWs didn't show up!

I am so deeply sorry for your loss and for what Delores went through. My condolences.

Tammy