Posts by scratchme1010

5

Time to quit the church?

by eyeuse2badub in

i'm a pastor and i want you to quit church.

by chris sonksen | fox news.

(istock).

scratchme1010

Thanks for sharing this. There are many other sources that state that church attendance is in decline. My concern is what people are replacing church related activities with.

34

How to spot awake JW at a convention

by Akid48 in

i cant spot one to save my life, so i wanted to now if any one could me figure out how..

scratchme1010

I cant spot one to save my life, so i wanted to now if any one could me figure out how.

My guess is that it might be the same way that they may have a hard time noticing you. I think the answer is in your own behavior and attitude.

However, if for some reason you're looking to be friends, or having an active JW with whom you can really talk, I'm not sure that might work.

First, there are people here who have been out of the JWs for decades and still behave like they just left this afternoon. Some people never let go even to their own detriment.

Second, some people might be experiencing a crisis, and even though they might be awake, they might not be in a place where they can even talk about it, leave alone admitting it to another person. Remember, some people think that they are going to die because of waking up. That's no small thing.

Third, a lot of the support that (in my humble opinion) we need is outside the WT and the congregation, and as away from the JWs as possible. You can get quality help and real education outside the congregation.

Fourth, people change their minds. Some people wake up but it's too difficult for them to deal with it and rather convince themselves to stay, which means that they will tell on you as a way of reaffirming their commitment to that organization.

Fifth, it's actually more on the fourth and first, I have encountered JWs and ex-JW people outside the JW setting (like in a company event, a bar, or a park where gay men go to have anonymous sex). Even under those circumstances they still didn't even want to acknowledge me (one of them was to busy to do so, anyway). The negative influence of that organization is very strong in many individuals.

Sixth, a lot of people survive being in that organization by putting up a big show about themselves and who they really are (elders, anyone?). If you are still interested in spotting those people, you will have to start to get a lot closer to them, and if you are PIMO, will that be to your best interest?

61

Immigration: The Truth about the LIe - CRIME

by Wonderment in

immigration: the truth about the lie: crimecrime: do immigrants increase rates of violence?

there has been a lot of talk about how immigrants pose a threat to the safety of this country by increasing crime rates.

is there any truth to this, or is it "fake news.

scratchme1010

What do you think? Are these sources reliable? Or, are they "fake news"?

Looking at the little snippets of information in your post, it's difficult to determine the veracity of the information.

However, I don't need any outside source to prove to me that crime in USA is committed by people from every walk of life. Just spend a day watching the Investigation Discovery network.

I don't understand trying to demonize one culture or another. I know great people who are the most decent, fine people, all of them have completely different heritages.

One cannot say that people from a given country are criminal. That's just nonsense, and I don't need a study or numbers to back that up. Being human is enough proof.

44

Has Your JW Background Benefited You In Any Way?

by minimus in

jw
friends

i would like to think there was some good that resulted from our being a witness at one time..

scratchme1010

I would like to think there was some good that resulted from our being a Witness at one time.

Here's something that I found that growing up a JW shielded me from. In the city where I live, every other person is in therapy. You want to make it big in NY? Forget acting, become a psychologist.

As a young adult free of the JWs, I decided to throw my first Thanksgiving/Holiday party. I invited my friends, and to my surprise they loved the idea of spending what I thought was supposed to be a family-oriented day, with me and not with their families.

During the dinner, I found out why. Here are the things that I learned that some people go through during the holiday season:

At the time, there were more suicides during that season that any other month of the year
Lots of people have lots of resentments towards family members, unresolved conflicts, or downright traumas, so they feel forced to meet family when they prefer no to
Many people see that time as a day where they have to be forced to be in the right mood, and stop their lives to pretend that they are happy when they are not
Lots of people go to support groups, 12-step programs, or other forms of support during that time more than through the rest of the year
A lot of people are very angry and resentful feeling that they have to spend money, host people they don't really like, and pretend that everything is ok during those days
A lot of people get in debt, pressured to look perfect
Those who believe in keeping up with the Joneses submit themselves to even more pressure because they feel that they have to impress others or "top the year before"

I've heard so many negative and horrible holiday related stories, that it started making me feel glad that as an adult I can concentrate in what I believe the holiday season is supposed to be for.

55

Cults in our Midst

by Lee Elder in

this is related to a comment i made in a previous thread.

cults exist in many diverse parts of society.

this includes politics.

scratchme1010

Interesting thoughts.

Cults exist in many diverse parts of society. This includes politics.

This sentences in your original post caught my attention. I know a few experts in the matter of cults. In fact, I'm spending my 4th of July weekend attending a conference on the topic. The experts I know, many agree that using cult as a label doesn't quite help educate the public about these groups (or effect). They provide a very interesting perspective regarding terminology, and they prefer to refer to them as "harmful groups", "high-demand groups", or "controlling groups".

Using those terms removes the religious tone that cults tend to have, so many other groups and relationships are included in their definition of a cults. It also help people who are hurting because of he negative effects of such groups, learn to take care of themselves and not fall in the hands of yet another similar (or worse) group or situation.

The experts I know run support groups, and the ones who attend come from a wealth of different groups, coming from every walk of life, politics, religion, there was eve a man who was in a Karate-related cult.

With that in mind, using cult as a label instead of treating seeing that there's an effect on people that certain things bring to them, doesn't paint a clear, complete picture. That's why sometimes it's difficult for some people to understand that agreeing with Donald Trump and believing in him is not necessarily cultic (cultish?) behavior.

Something else that I find relevant is that the experts themselves do not keep lists, nor do they name any specific groups as "cults". The reasons for that are two (1) there might be legal implications and (2) they concentrate in the effects of those groups, which is what I believe people should be talking about, not in the groups themselves.

Additionally, they list a few characteristics of high-demand, harmful, controlling groups:

Lack of accountability
Intense emotion and dissociative practices
Attitude of superiority and isolation
Lack of training
Manifestations of "groupthink" with dissent not tolerated especially in the "inner circle"
Intolerance of individual expressions of differences as well as commonalities
Lack of transparency, no open communication
Unhealthy conflict resolution

Keeping those things in mind, and looking at things from that point of view, I think it's a waste of time to talk about specific people, political parties, the liberal/conservative crap, or even the JWs, unless we are looking at the negative effects of what any of them can have on people.

6

Husband reading from the readers digest to our daughter...

by nonjwspouse in

...i could have sworn , hearing it from another room, that he was reading from a watchtower by the way he was talking!

he used that jw cadence.

slow reading with over emphasizing words.

scratchme1010

I'm glad that at least you can share here, and we understand.

He still really confuses me. I still have no real idea where he stands in his mind or emotions. How deep is his indoctrination at this point? I wish I knew. I still wait for the other shoe to drop, it's been 8 years, and it's exhausting beyond belief.

Many people maintain certain things as force of habit, even when we don't necessarily think that there's anything remotely JW in what we do.

As an example, I decided to join Toastmasters to learn public speaking. All the public speaking I had done up to that point was based on my training as JW and I was still sounding and coming across to audiences, even when I was teaching, as if I was preaching or proselytizing. There's nothing JW in me, but certain habits we tend to keep because that's how we learned to do things.

I hope this may ease your uneasiness.

18

Review: 2018 "Be Courageous!" convention

by neat blue dog in

friday and saturday were for the most part pretty light, not too culty or doctinal, could easily suck in the unsuspecting.

there were a couple of hypocritical lines that i took note of however.

at one point the speaker said, "if your boss fires everyone who disagrees with him but promotes everyone who agrees with him, you might be tempted to agree with him just to keep your job.

scratchme1010

JW Survey revealed that she had a GoFundMe campaign to get her to a bloodless hospital in the US for $150,000.

Thanks for the summary. Normally I don't read posts related their events, but for some reason I found this one interesting.

Hmmm... There isn't such thing as a "bloodless hospital" in the US (that's not how the medical profession works), and if there was one, why would she need an additional $150,000 to use it?

33

Jesus with an iPad. Really?

by punkofnice in

at a local meeting, one of the elders said that if jesus were on the earth today 'you can be sure' he would be preaching by showing videos on a tablet.. i kid you not.. i wonder what videos he'd be playing?.

obviously this was the elder's own pet theory.

wasn't it?.

scratchme1010

Jesus didn't even use an outline when he gave sermons. He had his beliefs inside of him and people beat a path to hear him talk.

And you know that Jesus didn't even use an outline, how? And what's your point anyway? That was the methodology of the time.

If a Witness says something ridiculous that demonstrates his thorough indoctrination, let "you people" have their laughs!

I agree 100%, that is, as per your words, If a Witness says something ridiculous that demonstrates his thorough indoctrination. That's not the case in this one. In this instance, you people are the ones I'm laughing at. You are the ones showing indoctrination.

BTW, this is yet another of those ridiculous hypothetical, never-will-happen scenarios that people in this forum for some reason get all worked up over them. There's no bigger sign of people being under the negative influence of the WT than this. Sad.

18

People will believe ANYthing no matter how insane

by TerryWalstrom in

i started watching this guy's videos and it was like trying to eat just one potato chip.https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rrdoao1_rf0______https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y8447ks90dk_______https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jufm8rtq1d0.

.

scratchme1010

I love that show. However, those are actors, they are not random people. In reality, Americans don't behave the way those actors do, so they use scripted actors posing as strangers.

Lots of fun anyway.

16

On this Fathers Day...

by babygirl30 in

jw
friends

i have never really spoken on social media about my jw family shunning me.

i didnt even discuss or answer any questions about why they didnt come to my wedding, my birthday parties, why there are never any pics of them with me/us together.

until today.... today i woke up and had this insane desire to be open.

scratchme1010

TODAY I woke up and had this insane desire to be open. To tell people the truth about it all and to put it out there why on Fathers Day 2018, my father isnt in my life. Below is what I wrote...and let me say that although I have been crying most of today reading and re-reading my post. It is the the support I have gotten from everyone OUTSIDE my immediate family that resonates with me - through and through. Just wanted to show that I'm proud of my damn self today! #yayme

I'm glad that you posted this. I'm sure that a lot of us can relate to your story. You do have a family on your own and have managed to live your life without them.

Thank you for sharing this.