Ahhh Hillary,
Difficult questions...I have faced similar questions with my own family members, specifically my mother. In a way, except for the age, she fits the description of the lady in scenario #1. In this instance, I have chosen not to try to inform her of the failings of her religion. I feel I do not have the right to destroy her belief system which she feels validates her existence.
Perhaps I would feel differently if there were any chance of she and I repairing our damaged relationship. The child abuse issue, raising its' ugly head in our own family, has driven a wedge between us that is as large as an ocean. She has lost her daughters and her grandchildren...yes, through choices she has made...so really her faith is all that's left to her. By the way, I feel that should apply to any individuals faith...I do not feel I have the right to interfere.
If however, subjects come up in our very limited conversations, I do not back down. I tell her how I view things now, and she can do what she wants with that info. Remember, I am only speaking of one instance...my own personal relationship with my mother. Give me a new set of circumstances, especially if I thought something I said could protect someone from harm, and I might feel differently.
Ok, I will let someone else comment on the other scenarios.
think41self
She had the vocabulary of a brothel owner specializing in service to sailors with Tourette's syndrome