has this site changed your stereotype viewpoint of people from other countries?.
it has me, almost as much as when i have visited foreign countries in person.
i have found the french to be friendly, the germans generous, the portuguese personable.
I learned just how small the world really is.
I also used to think that they spoke different languages in all those countries around the world. Boy was I wrong! So far, no matter what country they are from, everyone who posts here speaks english.
TimB
ok, have had enough to drink tonight so i will toss these two questions out.
will discuss this a bit more tomorrow.. 1. how many of you had sex outside of your marriage after leaving the witnesses?
provide whatever details about how and why that you're comfortable with.. 2. funny question: had a friend write me today that probably more jws per capita enjoyed oral sex the night they read it was a "conscience matter" than any other group in the us.
Right on,
I understand what you were saying now.
The Golden rule applies here.
Not just any relationship could be open and one could "cheat" even in an open relationship by lying. Trust is the thing that gives comfort to those without the chains of marriage vows.
Tim B
ever been in a situation where you start to feel a certain affinity with a poster?.
i have, quite recently i began to take particular notice of one posters writings, and i thought to myself - 'that fella has got his head screwed on!'.
a week or so later said "fella" made a reference to her husband!
Just for the record..........I am a lesbian trapped in a man's body. By the way, you have got to hear this song
Loudon Wainwright
I Wish I Was A Lesbian
Album: Career Moves
I wish I was a lesbian, and not a hetero.
I wouldn't have to deal with men and all their come and go,
And all their yucky yucky facial hair and all their machis'mo!
I wish I were a lesbian and not a hetero!
I wish I was a lesbian and that I wasn't straight.
I'd sleep with women only. Man, it would be great.
I'd throw away my diaphragm, I wouldn't want to mate.
I wish I was a lesbian, and that I wasn't straight!
I wish I were a lesbian, I'd like to be a dyke.
I'd sleep with k.d. lang. Mel Gibson, take a hike!
I think it would be nice to love someone who was alike.
I wish I was a lesbian, I'd like to be a dyke!
I wish I was a lesbian, that's why this song is sung.
It shouldn't really matter how somebody is hung.
Other things are more important- like how you use your tongue!
I wish I was a lesbian, that's why this song is sung!
I DARE Casey Kasem to play this!
I wish I was a lesbian, and not a hetero.
I wouldn't have to deal with men and all their come and go,
And all their yucky facial hair and all their machis'mo
(I hate that machis'mo!)
I wish I was a lesbian and not a hetero!
TimB
Sirona,
That is probably a very close depiction of my brain with one exception. There should be lot's of money flying around!
Tim B
ok, have had enough to drink tonight so i will toss these two questions out.
will discuss this a bit more tomorrow.. 1. how many of you had sex outside of your marriage after leaving the witnesses?
provide whatever details about how and why that you're comfortable with.. 2. funny question: had a friend write me today that probably more jws per capita enjoyed oral sex the night they read it was a "conscience matter" than any other group in the us.
Englishman,
When in the dubs, the primary reason for not committing adultery is fear of being DF'd. When we leave, that fear goes with it, and we may feel that there is nothing much to stop us playing around if we so fancy
I kind of agree with you. The fear of being DF'd is somewhat of a deterant but I think that the real reason we don't commit the 'horrible crime' of adultry is that we have been brainwashed into believing that it is a 'horrible crime'.
I do respect your opinion even if I disagree with it. I do disagree that it is a "terrible mistake". How is it a mistake when both parties are happy? I feel that religious beliefs are the "traps".
Tim B
ok, have had enough to drink tonight so i will toss these two questions out.
will discuss this a bit more tomorrow.. 1. how many of you had sex outside of your marriage after leaving the witnesses?
provide whatever details about how and why that you're comfortable with.. 2. funny question: had a friend write me today that probably more jws per capita enjoyed oral sex the night they read it was a "conscience matter" than any other group in the us.
Seeker,
I don't know much about the Eastern views but I do know about Southern views. LOL Jealousy, I believe, is a direct result of thinking that you "own" someone else. In fact, many interpret the word commitment as relenquishing all you personal rights to your partner. They won't admit that they feel that way, but if you break it down that is exactly the way they feel. Also, why is it that so many are willing to have an affair but not willing to allow their mate to have an affair? It's the ownership mentality. Noone wants to think that they OWN the "love of their life" but why else would we not want them to have the same pleasures. Admitting our own faults is often much more difficult than forgiving the faults of others.
You are so right when you said mentioned the huge sense of relief when you let go of jealousy or open the cell doors and live two separate lives together.
The term 'open marriage', in my opinion, refers more to the mental state of the relationship than to the physical. To have an open marriage one must also have an open mind and throw out all preconceived notions of love and marriage. Does this mean that there are no rules? No. There have to be limits. Those limits need to be discussed frankly and often because they will change. Ultimatly, we must consider the comfort and happiness of the other person in order to be in any successful relationship.
TimB
ok, have had enough to drink tonight so i will toss these two questions out.
will discuss this a bit more tomorrow.. 1. how many of you had sex outside of your marriage after leaving the witnesses?
provide whatever details about how and why that you're comfortable with.. 2. funny question: had a friend write me today that probably more jws per capita enjoyed oral sex the night they read it was a "conscience matter" than any other group in the us.
Seeker,
Thank you for starting this thread. This is probably the closest thing I ever seen to an ideal discussion. Not just the subject but the non-judgmental expression of opinions and experiences. Bravo!
I just wanted to put my 2 cents in. I can't let Xena do all the talking. Our open marriage began just a couple of months after we left the Borg. Although I had cheated on her years before in the technical "Clinton" form of sex. It was an affair she had with a co-worker that caused us to reexamine our relationship. I have to admit that it was very painful at first. It was painful only because we percieved ourselves as victims. We acted like victims. We have had a lifetime of conditioning that tells us that if we want to be happy we have to be in a monogomus relationship and that if your partner has any interest in someone else then you should be devastated. Having just left the Borg, we were in the the 'question all preconcieved notions' mode. We thew out those preconcieved notions and just talked about how we actually felt.
Does sex = marriage? Our answer was NO. No more than eating out = marriage. Sex is just ONE of the pleasurable things that we do together. We also go out to eat. We go to the park. We just spend time talking. Would I deny my wife the pleasure of a fine meal just because I couldn't be there? No. That would be selfish. Why should I deny her the pleasure of other men's company and yes sex? We understand the difference between sex and love.
By the way, is it possible to love more than one person at the same time? I think we all know the answer to that question. We have probably all felt love for someone that we would never want to live with. We usually tell ourselves that it isn't real love and then try to erase it.
What it boils down to is this. I love my wife and I have for 16 yrs. We will always love each other even if we don't live together. I think that we will live together until one of us dies because we have so much in common and I seriously doubt that I would ever meet anyone as special as her. Someone who thinks on the same wavelength. Do we have problems? Yes. Just like any marriage, it requires effort. Is there fear that we will find someone we like better and split up? No! I'm not sure I can explain why we don't fear that but we don't.
Thanks for all the input folks. This has been very enlightening.
TimB
being pregnant worked really well for me!
lol i milked that puppy for all it was worth!
got to sit in the back room and nap with my feet up!
My parents NEVER let me get up even to go to the bathroom, so I had to be a little creative. Being from Arkansas (tick country) every so often you would get a tick in the crotch area. I discovered my parents didn't want me scratching my crotch during the meeting (go figure) so I discovered the best way to get up out of my seat was to whisper in my mom's ear "I got an itch". Never failed to work!
Later in life I resorted to pinching my baby...hey do you what you gotta do! I think she thanked me for it later since it got her out of the meetings too!
Tim B
10 reasons i wanted to be a brady.
1) happy family.
2) happy endings.
I started with that perfect home, safe environment, happy family. But when I left I felt like a bunny rabbit crossing the road. Scary. There is sometimes, in a lot of us, the desire to go back just for that comfort.
Hang in there
Tim B
everyone on jw.com were jws and attended the same congregation.
now, i'm not saying that we'd follow brooklyn's rules (how boring).
instead what would it be like jw.com style.
You are invited Peace.. Just remember to bring your pipe.
Tim B
