I second what Splash said. Lay low. Accept counseling. Admit to *some* apostate readings, but not on a regular basis. Above all, never trust your spouse again. Actually, don't trust *anyone* even your closest friends in the congregation. They *will* turn you in. You're not ready yet to take a decisive stand and risk losing your family / marriage.
However, I would be clear to my spouse that turning me in to the elders for "independent thinking" is a serious blow to the marriage; one that I wouldn't be willing to accept if it ever happens again. Fair warning given.
Eden