Posts by WildTurkey

139

Favorite Music Video

by WildTurkey in

.

what is your favorite music video?

after shes my cherry pie, i like foo fighters learn to fly

WildTurkey

Dede likes Red Hot Chili Peppers cause of thier socks!

2

i'm glad i'm a man, you better believe.. i don't live off of yogurt, diet coke, or cottage cheese.. i don't bitch to my girlfriends about the size of my breasts.. i can get where i want to - north, south, east or west.. .

i don't get wasted after only 2 beers,.

WildTurkey

I'M GLAD I'M A MAN

I'm glad I'm a man, you better believe.
I don't live off of yogurt, diet coke, or cottage cheese.
I don't bitch to my girlfriends about the size of my breasts.
I can get where I want to - north, south, east or west.

I don't get wasted after only 2 beers,
and when I do drink I don't end up in tears.
I won't spend hours deciding what to wear.
I spend 5 minutes max fixing my hair.

And I don't go around checking my reflection
in everything shiny from every direction.
I don't whine in public and make us leave early, and
when you ask why get all bitter and surly.

I'm glad I'm a man, I'm so glad I could sing.
I don't have to sit around waiting for that ring.
I don't gossip about friends or stab them in the back.
I don't carry our differences into the sack.

I'll never go psycho and threaten to kill you
or think every guy out there's trying to steal you.
I'm rational, reasonable, and logical too.
I know what the time is and I know what to do.

And I honestly think its a privilege for me
to have these two balls and stand when I pee.
I live to watch sports and play all sorts of ball.
It's more fun than dealing with women after all.
I won't cry if you say it's not going to work.
I won't remain bitter and call you a jerk.

Feel free to use me for immediate pleasure.
I won't assume it's permanent by any measure.

Yes, I'm so very glad I'm a man, you see.
I'm glad I'm not capable of child delivery.
I don't get all bitchy every 28 days.
I'm glad that my gender gets me a much bigger raise.
I'm a man by chance and I'm thankful it's true.
I'm so glad I'm a man and not a woman like you!

I'M GLAD I'M A WOMAN
I'm glad I'm a woman, yes I am, yes I am.
I don't live off of Budweiser, Beer Nuts and Spam.
I don't brag to my buddies about my erections.
I won't drive to Hell before I ask for directions.

I don't get wasted at parties, and act like a clown.
And I know how to put that damned toilet seat down!
I won't grab your hooters, I won't pinch your butt.
My belt buckle's not hidden beneath my beer gut.

And I don't go around "readjusting" my crotch,
or yell like Tarzan when my headboard gets a notch.
I don't belch in public, I don't scratch my behind.
I'm a woman you see-I'm just not that kind!

I'm glad I'm a woman, I'm so glad I could sing.
I don't have body hair like shag carpeting.
It doesn't grow from my ears or cover my back.
When I lean over you can't see 3 inches of crack.
And what's on my head doesn't leave with my comb.
I'll never buy a toupee to cover my dome.

Or have a few hairs pulled from over the side.
I'm a woman, you know-I've got far too much pride!
And I honestly think its a privilege for me,
to have these two boobs and sit down when I pee.
I don't live to play golf and shoot basketball.
I don't swagger and spit like a Neanderthal.

I won't tell you my wife just does not understand,
or stick my hand in my pocket to hide that gold band.
Or tell you a story to make you sigh and weep,
then screw you, roll over and fall sound asleep!
Yes, I'm so very glad I'm a woman, you see.
Forget all about that old penis envy.

I don't long for male bonding, I don't cruise for chicks.
Join the Hair Club For Men, or think with my dick.
I'm a woman by chance and I'm thankful, it's true.
I'm so glad I'm a woman and not a man like you!

17

Change from within the ORG..suggestions?

by breeze in

jw
friends

change from within?

maybe if you could do away with ignoring your own family because they made a mistake and did something foolish in their life that already regret terribily?

caspian says: but i am not alone, i am in contact with at least 30 active elders, 1 travelling overseer and one prominent bethel elder who like me are trying to create change for the better within the organization.. other changes and suggestions that would improve the org, please!!!

WildTurkey

Any changes they may make I will never respect, because it would be for self-preservation not cause of Godly devotion.

8

in bed together

by SPAZnik in

jw
friends

"satan" & "the wts" are in bed together.. .

i am seething that they (in their sociopathic-ness).

show no remorse (beyond mere words).

WildTurkey

Satan in bed with the WTS? No I dont think Satan would sink so low.

139

Favorite Music Video

by WildTurkey in

.

what is your favorite music video?

after shes my cherry pie, i like foo fighters learn to fly

WildTurkey

What is your favorite music video? After Shes my cherry pie, I like Foo Fighters Learn to Fly

19

Turkey!!!

by LuckyLucy in

jw
friends

or ham for thanksgiving or something else?

?

WildTurkey

TURKEY!!!!!!! But not just on Thanksgiving

61

Describe Your "STATUS" In The Congreg...

by minimus in

jw
friends

if you were to describe what your status was in the congregation, what would it be?

were you viewed as mature?

in "good standing", a pain in the rear?

WildTurkey

I was GOD!!!!! just a little below the GB

3

Him and Her

by WildTurkey in

a man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.

a woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need.

a woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.

WildTurkey

Oh Im a dead man!!!!!!

3

Him and Her

by WildTurkey in

a man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.

a woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need.

a woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.

WildTurkey

A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.

A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need.

A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.

A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.

A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.

A successful woman is one who can find such a man.

To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little.

To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all.

Married men lived longer than single men, but married men are a lot more willing to die.

Any married man should forget his mistakes - there's no use in two people remembering the same thing.

Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed. Women somehow deteriorate during the night.

A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.

A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, and she does.

A woman has the last word in any argument. Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.

There are two times when a man doesn't understand a woman: before marriage and after marriage.

25

Do you think its talking down to you?

by WildTurkey in

jw
friends

when talking to someone who never was a jw, and they say to you how could you ever fall for all that?

it does bother me, cause i think it is some what condescending?

how do you feel about these questions?

WildTurkey

I do believe that some who say how could you ever fall for all that really want to know how a person could get involved with a religion like Jws. But I think some who say it, think that they would never fall for such a thing. And rather its the truth are not I think its condescending.