What better way to join the board than jumping in with both feet? (sorry if it's too long)
My experience is somewhat similar to the ones I've read here. My mom joined the Borg when I was about 5 years old, and she dragged my two sisters and myself to every meeting from that point forward.
My stepfather never became a believer and was opposed to having his wife join this cult. The opposition became very intense at times, but naturally this only strengthened my mother's conviction that she must have found the one true religion.
We lived in a small mountain town in Northern California and the congregation was about 90 publishers. We were treated as family and given lots of attention and love. My mother craved this attention and became baptized after 6 months of studying.
My sisters and I basically "grew up" going from door to door, and were mortified if we ever knocked on the door of one of our classmates. These days, my sisters and I laugh about how we used to walk up to the door; pray nobody was home, and "fake knock" on the door. In other words, we would pretend to knock. From the street, no one could tell the difference.
Anyway, I digress. One of my sisters became a regular pioneer at the age of 17, and the other sister became tangled up in the "world". Me, I stayed the course and was baptized at 17. Of course the three of us, even though we were fairly intelligent, eschewed college life in order to "store up riches in heaven". This still makes me so furious.
My oldest sister decided to move away from the small town, and I thought I would join her. We moved to Stockton to start a new life, and while we were there, my sister stopped going to meetings and basically faded from the Organization. I was on my way out when I met my first wife, whose whole family were strong JW’s, including my father in law who was an elder.
We were married 11 months later at the tender ages of 20 and 19. We started a life that revolved solely around the teachings and the influence of Jehovah's Witnesses. For five years we were happy doing the things we believed were necessary. Eventually I was appointed as a Ministerial Servant, and my wife and I had many great friends and family in the Stockton area. I was making great strides in the congregation, conducting a Tuesday night book study, and giving Sunday talks. My mom traveled from her small mountain town to hear me give my first hour talk and the Kingdom Hall was packed. My wife and I decided to scale back on our work in order to become regular pioneers.
Of course, one small item that I'm leaving out so far from this tale is that during my tenure as a Ministerial Servant, I had once been privately reprimanded for "fooling" around with one of the married sisters in the hall, and as I began to prepare for regular pioneering, I became emotionally involved with another sister. Obviously I was only “going through the motions” of being a strong, faithful JW.
Well, this was too much. Something had to give. I used my powers of persuasion and convinced this newly baptized sister to run off with me. The day before I was to begin my service as a regular pioneer, I ran off with another woman. I was 25 at the time. I left my wife, my friends, and my mother, knowing that I would be disfellowshipped and shunned.
I wish that I could say I had been strong enough to leave on my own, or that I had begun to doubt the teachings of the Witnesses. That’s not what happened to me. I left because I was tired of pretending and because I was thinking with a different part of my anatomy. I wanted to taste what “the world” had to offer. I did what so many JW’s do; I went off the deep end. I broke up with the woman I had run off with (who had also been disfellowshipped) and spent some time addicted to drugs and mixed up with the wrong crowd.
I'm not proud of the way I left, and I'm certainly not proud that I cheated on my wife, or that I spent some 2 years deep in a hole. I am proud though that I was able to break the mind control. My sisters had already left the Borg, and one had been disfellowshipped. I shunned her for a period of three years while I was still a JW, and this too I'm not proud of. I am thankful that I had my sisters’ loving support, and without them, I’m sure I would have been pulled right back into the organization.
Today, I am remarried and expecting my first child. My life has come full circle and I’m extremely happy with what I’m doing and the type of person I have become. I have a new set of “real” friends and I couldn’t be happier. If I could say one thing to people leaving the mind control of the JW’s: it’s that there is life after the Witnesses, and there is happiness outside of that organization. I used to believe that ex-JW’s had to be the saddest people in the world. They had left “the truth” and I thought how sad to continue on in a state of limbo, knowing that Armageddon is right around the corner and knowing they would be killed. These types of thoughts are complete rubbish. There is more happiness to be found in the “world” than there is in the “truth”. It’s a sense of liberation and freedom, knowing that there are good people out there, and knowing that a loving God would never demand the impossible from us. Living up to the code of the JW’s is impossible, and will only add stress and depression to your lives.
I applaud the efforts of those that are here for support. When I left in 1990, the internet didn't exist. I also applaud all of those that have been strong enough to remove themselves from being brainwashed. Please know that there are thousands like you that are here for encouragement and support.
