STS,
Sorry you're dealing with this. The control-freakery of the elders is really discouraging to someone that just wants to live their own life.
STS: my mom repeats the same hopeful attitude over and over- "keep an open mind". She went so far as to tell me to "stop taking in outside information" about the JW's.
Ask your mom, "So which is it mom? Should I, 'keep an open mind' or 'stop taking in outside information'?"