Would Animal Control come and remove them for you?
I once had to call Animal Control because I left the basement door open one night when we were living in the city and a big old alley cat invited himself in. We woke up to the biggest mess of hissing and fighting in the middle of the night cause Mr. Alleycat decided to fight my two resident cats for the privilege of living there.
We called Animal Control and told them we had some kind of a mangy beast howlin and yowlin in our house fighting with our cats and we were afraid to go outside the bedroom to break it up.When they laughed, my husband decided to man up and go take care of business armed with a fire extinguisher and holding the ironing board in front of him like a shield. He made his way out to the living room and chased the thing behind the sofa. He figured if he could open the front door without getting attacked, he might convince the thing to leave out the door once and for all and that would be the end of it.
Well, he made his move and jumped to grab the doorknob. He opened it up and aimed the fire extinguisher at the creature for convincing. The alleycat shot out the door with my husband straight after him shooting off the fire extinguisher as he ran out the door into the street. The sun was just starting to come up when Animal Control pulled up and there in the middle of the street, a cloud of dust still swirling around him, stood my husband in his underpants with his weapon still drawn. He put the fire extinguisher down and sheepishly told the lady from Animal Control, "Thank you for coming ma'am, but I took care of it myself."
I think the moral of that story is don't do any animal wrangling that Animal Control is willing to do for you. And also, possibly, always wear more than just your drawers if you try to do it yourself.
