Posts by ESTEE

You are not unlike so many of us who at one time believed all the stuff the jws taught. Perhaps you are at a crossroads now, questioning some of those beliefs that conflict with another belief, and that's okay. That's "normal."

You might want to try being open to something different than, "This is a perfect religion." How can imperfect people create a perfect religion?" How can a religion that encourages and promotes co-dependence be a "perfect" religion?

Look at nature. Don't baby birds grow up and leave the nest? Don't baby animals grow up and leave the den? Why are people taught that they must be co-dependent with a religion?

Food for thought.

ESTEE

31

CO asked my wife to wash his laundry...

by Albert Einstein in

jw
friends

well this happened some 9 years ago, while we were very active and busy in the congregation..... (in my country - eastern europe - there are no laundromats and most people have their washers at home...).

the co was single (age 45?

) and after one of the meetings he came to my wife with a plastic bag full of laundry and asked my wife politely if she could wash it for him till the next meeting.

ESTEE

29

How do you release the grudge?

by brainwashed-from-birth in

i have got a huge grudge against jehovah and his "organization".

i feel like it has ruined my life and any chance of a relationship with god..(if there is one.

) my immediate family has disowned me along with everyone i was comfortable with my whole life.

ESTEE

Hugs to you (((BFB)))

I see a lot of good advice on this thread.

I, too, was brainwashed from birth.

And, more importantly, my last meeting was in 2000.

It's been a long road, but a progressive one. Looking back, I feel like I have done a lot of good healing along the way.

One of the first things I learned is that Anger is a normal response to an abnormal situation. Don't beat yourself up when you feel angry. There are healthy ways of dealing with anger.

My suggestion is to be patient with yourself. It is not selfish to love yourself and take care of yourself. Unfortunately, the dubs (parents/elders/borg members) conditioned us to believe that we are to put ourselves last. However, I learned through therapy (many, many years of it) that if I take care of myself by filling my own cup first, then I would have something to share with others---out of the overflow. I didn't understand when I first heard that, because it was so foreign to what I had been taught.

Conversely, if I try to help others and my own cup is empty, how effective could I be?

Now I understand what that means.

It means I could choose to learn a new way of believing...in myself...to love and take care of myself. Exercise my free will and choose. If I didn't learn to take care of myself, no one would do it for me. It was my responsibility to provide, care for and love myself first, then I could be open to receive a healthy kind of love from others---because I could also give a healthy kind of love to another. The kind of love I talk about is an unconditional kind of love. The kind of love the jws teach is conditional love. Their teaching is, "In order to be loved, you should do this, and you must do that. Or you risk being destroyed at Armageddon." Conditions. Fear---Those are not love because they are based on fear. The scriptures say, "Perfect love throws fear outside."

In therapy, I learned that I had all the tools I needed to be a healthy and happy person...within myself. I chose to stop looking outside of myself for answers. Because I had been taught that I could not live without my religion. I was co-dependent with the religion. That was not healthy. We are created to stand up on our own two feet and stop leaning on others (e.g., parents or religion). Doesn't nature teach us that baby birds grow up and leave the nest? Or baby animals grow up and leave the den? Why are people taught that they must be co-dependent with a religion?

There is soooo much a person could say on this subject.

But, for now, if you can walk away from this thread with one tidbit of new information to think about, it will help you on your new path to freedom. Trust in yourself and in this new journey you find yourself on. There is healing after leaving a cult.

The brainwash says, there is no healing after leaving. But I know that is just a lie. The cult has set us up to believe that lie. I chose to replace that lie with a new truth, "There is healing after leaving a cult."

A much happier life awaits you, BFB. I believe you too, have all the tools to heal from that crazy religion.

I see lots of good healing on this forum.

*hugs*

ESTEE

29

PO says: "Don't say you are a JW, tell them you are with an educational foundation if they ask"

by MinisterAmos in

last wednesday field circus school was about how to adeptly use the phone to make appointments to drop off material and find the ho at home.. .

lie says the po, do not tell them you are a dub!

i fell out of my chair right after looking up "lies" in the index of my jw bible..

ESTEE

A PO who is ashamed of being a dub? Who could blame him?

Perhaps he's on his way out.hehehehe!!!

ESTEE

36

What do most ex-JWs "believe" after leaving?

by EverAStudent in

has anyone done a survey to determine what faith system, religion, or set of religious beliefs ex-jws tend to settle into after leaving the organization?

if not, would you care to post what you presently consider to be your own personal religion (e.g.

protestant, catholic, baptist, jw but not in the organization, agnostic, atheist, ...) and especially what you presently believe about jesus (was he a real historical human, is he god, is he an angel, ...).. thank you!.

ESTEE

I certainly don't believe in organized religion.

I do believe in the harmony found within nature.

ESTEE

17

JWs just came to my door and didn't even knock

by hemp lover in

jw
friends

i was working in the back room of my house, transcribing an interview with lara logan (she's fascinating), when my dogs started barking at the front door.

i ignored it for 30 seconds, because that's just what they do.

figured it was a cat or the mailman.

ESTEE

Perhaps these two youngsters are on their way out...? *cheers* Their heart obviously is not in it.

It is apparent to me that they are being made to preach. They are being told what to do. Big surprise, huh?

ESTEE

17

Do you think Mormons are a CULT?

by ESTEE in

jw
friends

pardon my asking.

i have a dance friend that invited me to their event at their church.

it is a half hour dance show, then a half hour dance lesson, then general dancing till midnight.. this sounded okay.

ESTEE

Thanks for the links, Mad Giant! Much appreciated...lots of reading to do...

ESTEE

38

Do the celestial positions on BM 33478 help to prove Artaxerxes I's 20th year was 455 BCE? (For 'scholar')

by AnnOMaly in

this is a spin off from this thread: http://www.jehovahs-witness.net/jw/friends/182714/4/hubby-is-researching-607.

background.

for the past three years, carl jonsson has been critiquing rolf furuli's 'oslo' chronology in an interdisciplinary journal called chronology and catastrophism review.

ESTEE

Ummmm...could you describe this "celestial" position in a little more detail? Sounds kinky.

ESTEE