does one need to LIVE with a person that they are involved with to see that they are gay? REALLY! If you didn't see that before you married him than you must be blind in my opinion.
Agape... hmm, a loving name to go with an unloving attitude. I didn't know he was gay until we had been married 7 years. Am I an idiot? No, but I was fooled by someone who had been advised to get married so his "unnatural feelings would go away" My marriage was a sham, I was the closet door.
Living together before we got married may not have provided me with the information that he was gay, but it would have let me in on the secret that he wasn't very interested in sex. I could have saved myself 7 years of losing my self-esteem. I was a good little JW wifey, so I of course, blamed any marital problems on myself.
Were there clues? Of course, and I can see them clear as day with hindsight. But I was so naive when we got married.. when someone says they love you and want to marry you... you aren't looking for signs of gayness..
And, just for your information, not all gays act different than heterosexuals. The only really obvious clue was his lack of interest in sex.. but there are many things that can cause that, it doesn't neccesarily point to a lust for the same sex.
And I was blind, blind to the fact that a "loving brother" could be so deceptive. Blind to the fact that the "loving shepherds" could tell a man to marry an innocent girl to cover up the fact that he was gay. And most of all.. blind to the fact that I was part of a cult, a pool of deception so deep it's a wonder I ever found my way out.
You are the blind one, Agape.. all that "new light" shining in your eyes, I guess.
Misty
(thank you Buttlight, a little support goes a long way)