I'm prompted to make my first post after many years. Dozy's information is good news and hopefully will accomplish the same thing this type of thinking did to me, Here is my experience in this regard:
I was a full time pioneer and my husband was elected elder when that arrangement first came into being. In 1972 he left me and the family to play (I should have followed sooner for my own reasons). I was left with a minor son, the other two having been married (at age 19-20 ???). This young son was in desperate need of a father and I asked the elders to call on him for encouragement --- no one came. By late 1973 the boy had got himself in trouble with some marijuana along with 5 other boys.
Meanwhile my husband had left behind the elder Organization Book and I had read it and was extremely familiar with all the old and new rules. When the boy was called to a JC as were the other boys, he confessed and was later disfellowshipped. He was 16 at the time and the rules were an underage child was to remain under the parental supervision (he was never in trouble or rebellious). I questioned the new elders as to why they felt that was necessary and they said that his answer to their question as to whether he would do it again was "I don't know" he couldn't foretell the future just that he would hope not to. To the JC it showed he wasn't really repentent in his heart. UAU they could read hearts. I argued with them about the information in the Org Book about minor children and their answer was "since there was no longer a man in the house they didn't feel I could handle the boy being alone".
Thereby started my exit from the organization. It was a 10 years fade after having spent 20 yrs being dedicated and submissive to the organization, always "waiting on Jehovah" for my doubts. I wroteo many letter to the society and eventually had my "life time" Bethel cousin tell me to quit writing the Society about this incident because I would be considered no more than a "difficult/obstinant sister".
Elders had lied about me and my family and I shouldn't defend myself??? I lost complete faith in "mother" . No more "waiting on Jehovah" it was time to to leave slowly and have never been DF'd or DA'd although now I am considered an apostate" (HURRAY) and no longer spoken to by my elder oldest son and his family and other self righteous ones of my so called "friends" and "loving sis/bro".
Sorry this is soooo long. I left much out and there is a lot more to my experience but this suffices for now to encourage those who are on the borderline or those may be snoops in here that it's time to smell the roses on the outside of the stranglehold of that Organization and their changing "brighter light".