Posts by Lemon

That's funny lv4fer ..... I was undecided when I was a kid....I wanted to go to heaven (even though I knew I couldn't) because I thought it would be cool to spy on people from the clouds....but the idea of living in a giant kingdom hall in the sky, that scared the hell out of me....so I started thinking it probably wouldn't be that great.

But the idea of living on a cleansed earth was pretty lame too....I still wanted cartoons and cereal from a box...I wasn't really ready to give it all up. I was always hoping that the "end" would be delayed so I could have a little more fun......

4

Negative Mention of JWs in books-How did they affect you?

by Cicatrix in

jw
friends

it happened to me when i was in the org-i'd be reading a pretty good book, and every once in awhile jws would be mentioned in a less than flattering light( or a description of "the dark night of the soul" would feel a little too familiar).

i would skim that part really quickly and tell myself that it was just opposers "persecuting" the jws.

but a little flag would go up in the back of my mind.

Lemon_Lime

Hey Cicatrix-

I was born and raised in the borg, elder father etc....but I can remember around age 15 or I started having those exact emotions when encountering negativism or "apostate" ideas. My first instinctual response was that these people were out to get us, but I remember certain thoughts lingering in the back of my mind, and I wasn't sure how to feel about it. I didn't really trust anyone enought to talk about it, so I decided to start listening to my "gut" instead and started living the way that felt right.

It took about two more years, and I was finally able to think freely and left it all behind (my ex and I took about 5 people with us too).

Interesting Post.

22

My Story

by Lemon_Lime in

first off, i want to give prop's to "dantheman"......that post inspired me to share my experience, and thanks to everyone that responded to my first post under "desperately seeking"....that was a nice welcome.

this might ramble ..... i was born and bred into the borg....my dad was/is an elder, i had a big family, two older sisters, three younger bro's....i was baptized at 15 (i'm 25 now) and tried to pioneer...give talks...have repsonsibilities...but the wrong feeling that had been welling up in my stomach and kept getting stronger as time went on.. when i moved away from my hometown at 17, my life really started to change.....i met an awesome girl (another jw)....and we fell in love pretty quickly...and i also left home and got my own apt.

(much to my fathers sadness).

Lemon_Lime

Hey Lyin,

I recently moved out of SF and into Sin City.......

22

My Story

by Lemon_Lime in

first off, i want to give prop's to "dantheman"......that post inspired me to share my experience, and thanks to everyone that responded to my first post under "desperately seeking"....that was a nice welcome.

this might ramble ..... i was born and bred into the borg....my dad was/is an elder, i had a big family, two older sisters, three younger bro's....i was baptized at 15 (i'm 25 now) and tried to pioneer...give talks...have repsonsibilities...but the wrong feeling that had been welling up in my stomach and kept getting stronger as time went on.. when i moved away from my hometown at 17, my life really started to change.....i met an awesome girl (another jw)....and we fell in love pretty quickly...and i also left home and got my own apt.

(much to my fathers sadness).

Lemon_Lime

Thanks for all of the welcomes, it's nice to meet everyone.

>dantheman: lemon_lime_shasta - that is hilarious, if you are referring to what I think you're referring to.

you guessed it

LL

22

My Story

by Lemon_Lime in

first off, i want to give prop's to "dantheman"......that post inspired me to share my experience, and thanks to everyone that responded to my first post under "desperately seeking"....that was a nice welcome.

this might ramble ..... i was born and bred into the borg....my dad was/is an elder, i had a big family, two older sisters, three younger bro's....i was baptized at 15 (i'm 25 now) and tried to pioneer...give talks...have repsonsibilities...but the wrong feeling that had been welling up in my stomach and kept getting stronger as time went on.. when i moved away from my hometown at 17, my life really started to change.....i met an awesome girl (another jw)....and we fell in love pretty quickly...and i also left home and got my own apt.

(much to my fathers sadness).

Lemon_Lime

(footprints) It was only in retrospect that "we" agreed that it was the right decision.......I initiated it, which caused a lot of pain.

Btw......thanks for the responses, I look forward to getting to know everyone better.

Email me anytime @ [email protected]

-dan

27

Weird Childhood Thoughts

by pettygrudger in

jw
friends

when i was growing up, i used to think that as long as they made fuzzy loving commercials (i.e.

the faygo one was my favorite & coke second) that the trib & big-a couldn't possibly come!!!

i also used to plan how i would hoard food & water in holes in my backyard that we wouldn't have to eat all the icky mice & insects my mom said we would have to live on.

Lemon_Lime

I liked your post....

When I was about 5, I remember my father saying that everything would be destroyed..including television...it really pissed me off, because cartoons would have been better in Paradise.

20

Today is my sons birthday

by mamashel in

jw
friends

hi guys!

i thought since all of you were so wonderful telling everyone hapy birthday, you might do me a huge favor.

today is my sons 11th birthday, first celebrated birthday since leaving the hall.

Lemon_Lime

Have a rad B-Day!!!!!!

Lemon_Lime

(give your mom a hug)

22

My Story

by Lemon_Lime in

first off, i want to give prop's to "dantheman"......that post inspired me to share my experience, and thanks to everyone that responded to my first post under "desperately seeking"....that was a nice welcome.

this might ramble ..... i was born and bred into the borg....my dad was/is an elder, i had a big family, two older sisters, three younger bro's....i was baptized at 15 (i'm 25 now) and tried to pioneer...give talks...have repsonsibilities...but the wrong feeling that had been welling up in my stomach and kept getting stronger as time went on.. when i moved away from my hometown at 17, my life really started to change.....i met an awesome girl (another jw)....and we fell in love pretty quickly...and i also left home and got my own apt.

(much to my fathers sadness).

Lemon_Lime

First off, I want to give prop's to "dantheman"......that post inspired me to share my experience, and thanks to everyone that responded to my first post under "desperately seeking"....that was a nice welcome. This might ramble ....

I was born and bred into the borg....my dad was/is an elder, I had a big family, two older sisters, three younger bro's....I was baptized at 15 (I'm 25 now) and tried to pioneer...give talks...have repsonsibilities...but the wrong feeling that had been welling up in my stomach and kept getting stronger as time went on.

When I moved away from my hometown at 17, my life really started to change.....I met an awesome girl (another JW)....and we fell in love pretty quickly...and I also left home and got my own apt. (much to my fathers sadness). Early on, we realized that we had similar wrong "feelings" about what we had been raised to beleive....but this presented a problem....our families were in the cult, but my girlfriend and I really loved each other....so we did what any good young christians would do...we maintained a fairly decent facade and got married (we were both twenty).....after our honeymoon we attended one meeting and decided to drop out completely.

Up to this point we had been regarded in fairly good standing, so this came as quite a shock to our families and former friends.....I consider myself lucky that I had my best friend to go through this experience with...it was a pretty big trauma and we didn't really know what to do, but despite the stress and shunning (and sadness that it caused our families), the freedom felt great. About two months later I went to my parents house and laid everything out to them (we were never da'd or df'd, we just left)....it was the first time I ever saw my father cry....it was pretty bad...I told him that I beleived he was in a cult...and the look of horror/sadness/guilt/? in his face was pretty tough for me to handle, but it reinforced the decision that we had made.

Unfortunately, after about two years of marriage, we got divorced.....we realized that we had gotten married too young and that we still had a lot of life to live. That was my second biggest trauma....I initiated the divorce and have had a hard time dealing with the guilt (we never had any kids, and now we are really close friends) but up to that point we had been each others security, and had taken it for granted that we would be together for a long time....or at least that our feelings wouldn't change.....that type of dependency is what I see as one of the major dangers of the borg.....the longer you remain, the harder it is to admit to yourself that you've been living a lie.

After the divorce, I moved out to San Francisco and spent the past few years having fun, making great friends, soul searching and generally having an insane time.....I still thought about the cult from time to time but I had been trying hard to forget about my past. It all came back while having a conversation with a friend (we had known each other for a year) when we realized that we were both ex J'dubs. We were sitting a club (house bumpin' in the background) when we reach the realization, she starts crying and we hug for a few minutes, it was surreal, we felt a really intense bond, and it re-awakened some feelings about the past that I thought were gone. It made me realize the importance of thinking through my past completely, and being available to anyone who might need to talk.

I've probably dragged this on long enough, but I want to say thanks to the organizers of these boards and good luck to everyone that's breaking FREE.....if anyone needs to talk, please email.....I would like to make some new friends....

-dan

Lemon_Lime

Posts by Lemon_Lime