The Kingdom Hall was filled to overflowing capacity one Sunday morning. The CO was ready to start the talk when two men, dressed in long black coats and black hats entered through the rear of the hall. One of the two men walked to the middle of the hall while the other stayed at the back of the hall. They both then reached under their coats and withdrew automatic weapons.
The one in the middle announced, "Everyone willing to take a bullet for Jehovah stay in your seats!"
Naturally, the chairs emptied quickly. People ran screaming out the door, followed by an elder and his wife.
After a few moments, there were about twenty people left sitting in the kingdom hall. The CO was still standing up front watching with interest.
The men put their weapons away and said gently to him, "All right, the hypocrites are gone now. You may begin."
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This fundamentalist Christian couple felt it important to own an equally devout pet. So, they went shopping. At a kennel specializing in this particular breed, they found a dog they liked quite a lot. When they asked the dog to fetch the Bible, he did it in a flash. When they instructed him to look up Psalm 23, he complied equally fast, using his paws with surprising dexterity.
They were impressed, purchased the animal, and went home (piously, of course). That night they had some friends over. They were so proud of their new fundamentalist dog and his major skills, they called the dog and showed off a little. The friends were impressed, and asked whether the dog was able to do any of the usual dog tricks, as well. This stopped the couple cold, as they hadn't thought about 'normal' tricks.
"Well," they said, "let's try this out."
Once more they called out to the dog, and then clearly pronounced the command, "Heel!"
Quick as a wink, the dog jumped up, put his paw on the man's forehead, closed his eyes in concentration, and bowed his head.
Binky
JoinedPosts by Binky
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2
Two Religious Jokes
by Binky inthe kingdom hall was filled to overflowing capacity one sunday morning.
the co was ready to start the talk when two men, dressed in long black coats and black hats entered through the rear of the hall.
one of the two men walked to the middle of the hall while the other stayed at the back of the hall.
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Binky
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36
What kind of car would Jesus drive?
by Binky inthere's a debate raging over here.
i gotta go with a volkswagen mini-bus.
he was a carpenter, right?
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Binky
worrrrrrrrrd.
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9
Do Jehovah's Witnesses donate organs?
by Binky inmy girfriend read it on her brother's web log.
) now she's all confused.. many thanks.. binky,.
god of fridays and shaving cream afros
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Binky
Many thanks.
Binky, Demigod
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36
What kind of car would Jesus drive?
by Binky inthere's a debate raging over here.
i gotta go with a volkswagen mini-bus.
he was a carpenter, right?
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Binky
There's a debate raging over here. I gotta go with a Volkswagen mini-bus. He was a carpenter, right? So he would need something big enough to carry around his tools, and his apostles, and still be planet-friendly.
Binky, Rock Deity
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9
Do Jehovah's Witnesses donate organs?
by Binky inmy girfriend read it on her brother's web log.
) now she's all confused.. many thanks.. binky,.
god of fridays and shaving cream afros
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Binky
My girfriend read it on her brother's web log. (He's one of them.) Now she's all confused.
Many thanks.
Binky,
God of Fridays and Shaving Cream Afros