Thank you very much for your comments and suggestions.
I am aware that there might be more options like for example fading or staying in and gently over the years try to influence wife and child.
I will read Steven Hassans books and I try to look at the non cult personality of my wife.
But probably I am already heading for option 2, as next week the elders want to talk to me again about my doubts. My wife wants me to tell them also about my decision to accept blood and blood products in a life threatening situation for me and my child, as I don't want to be bloodguilty. So probably they will view me sooner or later as da by action which is fine for me, as the situation would be clear.
I will give my best to be mild and loving as I don't want to end up in divorce.