Posts by ILoveTTATT

39

Why are the moms so attached to religion?

by ILoveTTATT in

jw
friends

please don't take this the wrong way, i would love it for women to comment on this thread because i just can't understand something!!.

here's the pattern i see:.

mostly guys in here.. if the guys are married, their wives usually stay a jw, or it takes 3 times as much time to convince a woman to leave than a man.. if the guys have a jw father, the father is open-minded and can be more easily persuaded to leave.

ILoveTTATT

I think it is the woman's interest in family, community, connectedness that drives her to stick it out longer than the man.

soical and emotional manipulation - making you feel bad if you say or do the wrong thing etc. and I suspect that women are perhaps a bit more

susceptible to this than men.

there are much stronger emotions tied to even the most instinctual aspects of the relationship (aka sex) than for a man

It is definitely an emotional issue for my wife. JWs in a sense "rescued" her from a life of casual sex, drug abuse, alcoholism. etc. They gave her a

direction, a hope, a purpose in life, things she never felt she had the remotest chance at.

She doesn't give much thought to doctrine, so the flip-flops and inconsistencies don't really matter to her. It is an emotional connection - it feels right, so it must be right.

She thinks they at least have the basics right, no immortal soul, paradise earth, no war etc.. and because of this she feels it must be "the truth"

I appreciate the quotes. It seems like you with your wives (and I with my mom) have an uphill battle. There is no TATT to them, since it doesn't matter. They will stick to JW's despite any logical argument. Fundamentally, even if you are proven right, you are attacking things that every woman protects tooth-and-nail: the family's unity, possibly the children, the marriage. The stability in their lives.

This creates a very difficult situation. No matter how logically right you are, it won't matter.

So let's use the analogy of an abusive husband/boyfriend: What helps women break free from them? If they love the man, they will forgive many things, but everyone has their breaking point.

Perhaps the man is their only income source. Many times, even though the man is cheating on the woman, especially in third-world countries, the wife will not leave the man. Doing so would be financial suicide. Also, some women stay in a marriage like that "for the children"...

I am just bouncing ideas here...

Please keep them coming!!

31

Fading hurts so much!!

by ILoveTTATT in

yet another update on my story:.

for various reasons, i still have to go to all meetings.

(i am looking to change my personal circumstances to allow me to live somewhere else so i can fade easier)... i actually don't mind going to the mid-week meeting since i can comment on the bible reading, and slowly but surely i can introduce little seeds of cognitive dissonance... making it seem like i am super interested in what the interlinear says or that people can actually go and check out the manuscripts for themselves online!

ILoveTTATT

Adamah:

CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.

Thursday is my first meeting that I will miss. Excuse: sick.

What I will really be doing: watching a movie. =)

Ask me on Thursday.

31

Fading hurts so much!!

by ILoveTTATT in

yet another update on my story:.

for various reasons, i still have to go to all meetings.

(i am looking to change my personal circumstances to allow me to live somewhere else so i can fade easier)... i actually don't mind going to the mid-week meeting since i can comment on the bible reading, and slowly but surely i can introduce little seeds of cognitive dissonance... making it seem like i am super interested in what the interlinear says or that people can actually go and check out the manuscripts for themselves online!

ILoveTTATT

Dear Mr. Flipper:

Totally agreed. I have doubts about the doubts sometimes. When that happens, I sit down and review the facts that I know. To combat the doubts about the doubts, I challenge myself to find more and more stuff that's wrong and verify it for myself. For example, I went to the KH library and looked up the 1969 awake, I have taken pics of the "Studies in the Scriptures" and have seen the actual pagan symbol.

I am reverse witnessing using a pseudonym online. This helps.

Unfortunately, I cannot stop going to the meetings completely. I can make a designed fade. In fact, this week I will miss my first meeting. =)

ILTTATT

27

Integrity over living a lie....

by Happier in

jw
friends

hey to everyone here... so i have never been one for writing much of my feelings down for other people to see.

this however has become so important to me and i may be able to help someone who dares go looking for answers some place other than the jw.org website.

first of all i would like to thank anybody and everybody who had the courage enough to write their experience in the organisation.

ILoveTTATT

Hi happier!!

First of all, welcome!!

Isn't it ironic that JWN is full of good-hearted, loving people?? We all want to help you!!

I am so sorry you had to go through an experience like this!! It is so sad to think that people can let go of their humanity to protect a group!!

You have a great mom!! Cherish her!! Love her!! Not many moms have the courage to face the JW's!!

I wish you a happy and great life, and welcome again!!

ILTTATT

39

Why are the moms so attached to religion?

by ILoveTTATT in

jw
friends

please don't take this the wrong way, i would love it for women to comment on this thread because i just can't understand something!!.

here's the pattern i see:.

mostly guys in here.. if the guys are married, their wives usually stay a jw, or it takes 3 times as much time to convince a woman to leave than a man.. if the guys have a jw father, the father is open-minded and can be more easily persuaded to leave.

ILoveTTATT

Please don't take this the wrong way, I would love it for women to comment on this thread because I just can't understand something!!

Here's the pattern I see:

Mostly guys in here.

If the guys are married, their wives usually stay a JW, or it takes 3 times as much time to convince a woman to leave than a man.

If the guys have a JW father, the father is open-minded and can be more easily persuaded to leave. The JW mother stays, even shuns for many years until her death.

WHY???????

Why does religion/cults affect women more? Why is it harder for them to be convinced? Maybe guys are convinced by logic (show them doctrinally that JW's are wrong) and women are convinced by emotions (show them that JW's go against basic human emotions like motherly love)?

Please, don't get me wrong... it's just a pattern I am seeing... If ex-JW women have an idea or insight on this, that would be appreciated!! Maybe the "silver bullet" for guys is different than for women... maybe there has to be a specific book on how to help women to come out of JW's...

ILTTATT

31

Fading hurts so much!!

by ILoveTTATT in

yet another update on my story:.

for various reasons, i still have to go to all meetings.

(i am looking to change my personal circumstances to allow me to live somewhere else so i can fade easier)... i actually don't mind going to the mid-week meeting since i can comment on the bible reading, and slowly but surely i can introduce little seeds of cognitive dissonance... making it seem like i am super interested in what the interlinear says or that people can actually go and check out the manuscripts for themselves online!

ILoveTTATT

Thank you all!

I have a habit of not writing back, to comment, but this time I will!

@ Blues Brother - Thanks!! Wow, I cannot IMAGINE giving parts on the meeting, thankfully I have a convenient situation now where my cards are in limbo and neither the elders from one hall nor the ones from the second one know where I am... that's good!! However, because of not wanting to dissapoint my GF's family, I still have to pretend that I am a "good JW"... hope to move soon (as soon as I get a job in the other city), but even where I am I want to slowly fade away!

@ DOC - exactly!! I wanted to comment on how mysogynistic (against women) the Bible really is!! The WT gave ONE example of how impartial Jehovah supposedly is, and everyone agreed, but I was shocked at the fact that NO ONE (besides me) thought of the many examples where God clearly discriminated!! If it was a boy - X amount of days of uncleanness, if it was a girl - double. Guy gets killed for touching the Ark, David gets away with adultery and murder, and his kid dies for his (David's) sins!!

@Mum: Yes, I will move ASAP. I need a job first.

@Vidiot: You are right. I am not fading. I need to start to fade.

@BibleStudent: Thank you for your constantly kind words. I think that given my current situation, when I move I will be able to fade at a much faster rate. I will give your suggestions a try.

@Comatose: It was just a figure of speech. I am not planning to get drunk either before or after a meeting. I was just saying how I need some form of stress relief because going to the meetings and holding back your thoughts is very stressful.

@Adamah: Thank you. Like I said to comatose, I was just using a figure of speech. Sorry if I spooked out some. I guess it would have been a LOT worse if I had used the figure of speech "somebody shoot me"... lol... But regardless, I need some sort of healthy stress release. I guess I should go and run (exercise) or watch a movie or do something fun after every meeting. Maybe post on JWN and rant as much as I want and say here what I wanted to say...

@JGNat: You are so lucky!! I guess that I am lucky in a sense since I have had no "priviledges" for some years, I am just a low-to-zero-hour Joe Schmoe publisher. THANK YOU for your suggestions. They are great, and I plan to use them ASAP. I guess I will just read the Bible or something, and bring a notepad to write whatever I want. I am already sitting way in the back so that no one sees me. I am glad that after the meeting I can discuss things with the GF and vent a little with her. I have also noticed the power of one of my comments; I have changed the comments from black-and-white thinking to just a little critical thinking.

@BU2B: I will answer that one privately. Thanks.

@Data Dog: I am skipping service too!! I have successfully done 3 months without reporting because of the "my cards are in limbo" situation. When I am forced to go out in "serve-us" I try to go alone and I pretend I ring the doorbell... Lots of "Not at Homes"!! lol

@Julia Orwell: Fading does not hurt for me because of that. Unless I was fading in the area of the world where I have most of my friends, then it would hurt because of that. It hurts because keeping knowledge to myself is one of the hardest things to do for me!! I feel sorry for humanity to think that so many people, not only in JW but in so many cults, have their lives destroyed because of ignorance and evil people taking advantage of sincere, good people!

Love to you all!

ILTTATT

10

Hi, Im new (kind of)

by geek in

jw
friends

hi, i was here years ago but havnt been around for maybe 7 or 8 years.

i was brought up as a jw, my mum still is, ive studied and studied over the years but have never been baptized and have always had nagging doubts.. ive been trying to talk to my mum and her husband about my doubts but its like they dont understand what im saying, my mum's husband jumps from one topic to the next, throwing point after point at me and doesnt listen to any of the answers i give him.. for instance this week i told him that i doubt the bible because when it talks about the last days it fails to mention the ice caps melting or about the technology we now have but talks about wars etc that mankind has always known.

i just get the same answer from him everytime "it cant mention everything or the bible would be a mile long".

ILoveTTATT

I totally feel for you... Jehovah's Witnesses do not THINK... they just respond with the same canned responses that they are given!

You, my friend, should learn the Truth about the Truth...

Go to websites such as

www.jwfacts.com

www.ajwrb.org

and read the following books:

Crisis of Conscience - Raymond Franz

Combatting Cult Mind Control - Steven Hassan

Send me a private message, I will try and answer your questions as best as I can, well thought-out answers ok?

31

Fading hurts so much!!

by ILoveTTATT in

yet another update on my story:.

for various reasons, i still have to go to all meetings.

(i am looking to change my personal circumstances to allow me to live somewhere else so i can fade easier)... i actually don't mind going to the mid-week meeting since i can comment on the bible reading, and slowly but surely i can introduce little seeds of cognitive dissonance... making it seem like i am super interested in what the interlinear says or that people can actually go and check out the manuscripts for themselves online!

ILoveTTATT

Hi!

Yet another update on my story:

For various reasons, I still have to go to all meetings. (I am looking to change my personal circumstances to allow me to live somewhere else so I can fade easier)... I actually don't mind going to the mid-week meeting since I can comment on the Bible reading, and slowly but surely I can introduce little seeds of cognitive dissonance... making it seem like I am super interested in what the Interlinear says or that people can actually go and check out the manuscripts for themselves online! It takes me a while to think of ways of saying what I want to say without saying it!! "Here is an APPARENT contradiction"... "EVIL APOSTATES WOULD SAY that..."

The rest of the time, though, I need a strong drink after the meetings... to numb my mind a little... the utter nonsense that is said in the meetings makes my blood boil!! I am apalled at the stupidity of humanity!!Knowing TTATT and going to all meetings is just... torture!!

I will start making a plan to fade out, and stick to it!! 1 meeting lost the first month, 2 the second, and so on...

10

Active Witness Reading Combatting Cult Mind Control

by BU2B in

jw
friends

i have gotten a thought about how to wake active witnesses up.

since the book does not mention jws specifically, if you could get a active jw to read ccmc, what do you think their reaction would be?

could they clearly see how jws fit in as a cult?, or would the average jw be blinded to the obvious and just see how other groups like mormons, moonies, scientology, etc fit the mold?

ILoveTTATT

Careful! Be sure that it is the correct version since the latest book by Hassan strangely mentions JW's a lot but doesn't mention mormons!!

10

What would be the best decision if we took out all the religion out of the blood issue?

by ILoveTTATT in

i am wondering this:.

what surgeries/procedures/situations have been shown to be life-or-death decisions without blood?.

i only know, currently, of trauma (car accident, gunshot wound, etc).... what would be treatable exclusively with "no blood fractions" and with "no procedures using my blood"?.

ILoveTTATT

Paintedtoenail: This is more the answer that I am looking for!! So, doctors would only transfuse if they knew the risks of transfusing were less than the risks of NOT transfusing, right?

It would be interesting if someone made a short guide on various procedures and their evolution to the point of not having blood transfusions. I know that in certain procedures, the added risk of bloodless is much much higher than the risk of using blood. In other procedures, bloodless would be the gold standard. I would want unbiased information that would show the pros/cons of the specific procedure.

I would like to create a "medical directive" for myself based on the best practices in the medical profession, and not based on any religious beliefs. I think I have to do one to go above my personal living will... unfortunately I have to make a new one that's non-JW...