Your story sounds somewhat like mine, except that I just can't go to meetings anymore. They are supremely boring. When I did go, the last few years I would read the Bible or something else during them because I felt that I was wasting my life. You might be around my age. How can you stand to waste so much time? We don't have that much time left. One meeting can easily kill four hours when you consider the time to get dresssed, drive to the hall, etc.
The public talks have been horrific where I'm from. I completely lost my desire to invite new ones to meetings because of the low quality of the talks. And the situation's getting worse for several reasons: 1) The material is not as exciting as it was back in the Frreddy days when we thought exciting things were about to happen on the world scene. 2) People now have so much info available to them through the internet, TV channels, etc., that they're accustomed to acquiring info in an entirely different way now. They want their info rapidly. If they get bored, they leave the website, channel, etc. Their attention spans are shorter. They couldn't stand to sit and listen to some guy in a cheap suit ramble incoherently and boringly for 30 minutes.