Posts by talesin

41

Our Wedding Picture

by doodle-v in

jw
friends

.

hey guys, we just got back from vegas!

got home at 3 this morning *yawn* we had a blast though!

talesin

Congratulations! You two look mahhhvelous!

A Vegas wedding (sigh) - betcha had a great time! Did you see any of the sights/shows or just some lovely ceilings?

tal

10

Why is a trauma to move out from an organisation like the j.w ?

by arancia in

i was converted j.w about 15years ago but last year i got to know what sort of people they were in reality.

my husband and i made the decision in five minutes.within few days we sent a very brief letter that stated in few words that we were living the oganisation disgusted for what we so in tv on channel 9 the previous sunday.

we reach very fast that decision because we freely and voluntarily got in ,therefore with the same spirit got out.

talesin

Congratulations, arancia, on your choice to be free. All the best on your 'journey'.

To answer your question from the viewpoint of one raised in the bORG.

- I learned practically zero social skills, and didn't know how to interact with people.

- I never had to decide what was right and what was wrong - I was always TOLD the right/wrong thing to do. I had to learn a values system.

- The principles of judgmentalness were deeply instilled in me - it took years to learn to accept myself and others for who they are.

- Shunning - when I was DFd, I had one friend in the world (my boyfriend) and it was very hurtful to have lifelong 'friends' and family walk by me on the street without acknowledgement.

- Lack of education - even a high-school education was discouraged (which for me meant 'forbidden'), so it was a struggle to achieve any status in the workplace.

- I had believed all my life that jah was watching me every second, even KNOWING MY THOUGHTS. Guilt was a huge part of my life, and took many years to work through.

Hope that was helpful.

talesin

'free at last, free at last, thank g*d almighty, I'm free at last'

- Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.

6

You know it is bizzare.....Thanks

by SheilaM in

i won't name names but i found this funny.

i have had a hard time knowing how to feel about my mother's death.

i haven't cried much just a lot of frowning and feeling weird.

talesin

I'm happy you were able to cry, hope it released some of the pain.

You're right, it's amazing how people will surprise you with their goodwill when the chips are down.

And if yr bro gives you more grief, just let me know, I'll have at him

{{{{{{{sheila}}}}}}

tal

46

Women and abusive relationships...I don't understand?

by obiwan in

jw
friends

why do you stay in an abusive relationship?

do you feel that it's your responsibility to change him?

do you feel you "owe" him.

talesin

I don't understand either, cause it's s-o-o-o-o complicated. Each situation has different dynamics, so there is no clear-cut answer to this question.

But what I really don't understand is why we permit/excuse the abusers and their behaviour. And why we keep blaming the 'victims' for staying. I think society needs a 'paradigm' shift on this issue so that we turn the question around to read

"why do we tolerate spousal abuse?"

ex. you know your brother hits his wife, but you don't call him on it

ex. you hear the guy next door beating his wife, but you don't call police

ex. you see the bruises of a co-worker and don't offer your home as refuge

thoughts? comments?

tal

28

OUR MENTAL HEALTH

by RAYZORBLADE in

no epiphany whatsoever, but i was pondering this subject tonight on my way back home from work.. there are many subjects on the matter of health, and of course: post jw, our mental health.. for most of you, how would you rate your present mental health?.

comparitively, our physical health, depending upon what ails us, we can generally heal and feel better after brief or extended recovery time.. mental health on the other hand, is definitely long lasting.. i've been almost 20 years outside of the jws, but i think it nearly took me that entire 20 years to get where i am today.. sad, but true.

anyone like to contribute their thoughts on this matter.. thank you.

talesin

On a continuum of 0-10 where 0 v. ill and 10 is reasonably healthy, let's say, I was at zero when I left the JW, and now I'm pretty much at 9/10 most of the time.

When the 'black dog' rears its ugly head, and/or flashbacks are happening, the numbers plunge. Then I just have to work my way back up.

Pretty 'normal', if you ask me.

tal

124

The locking of threads.

by seven006 in

jw
friends

it seems like there is a little fire starting to burn here on the subject of locking threads.

iv been on this board a long time and on average have only seen about one out of every 200 threads locked.

those who have their threads locked take it very personal, that's understandable.

talesin

What seems to be lacking is the ability to discuss these matters in a civil manner.

too true, unfortunately

good thread, and a good explanation

Many thanks to Simon & mods for the hard work - it ain't easy bein' green!

talesin

41

How Do I Get Rid of This?

by Big Tex in

have you ever had your eyelid twitch uncontrollably?

it's driving me crazy.

it's been going on over a year.

talesin

Big Tex

This happens to me when I am either not dealing with stress particularly well, or if having flashbacks.

What works? Getting some rest, working through 'issues'.

Hope that's of some help.

tal oops, durn twitch, I meant

86

(((((Group Hug)))))

by LittleToe in

jw
friends

there's been too much volatile stuff going around, and a few folks appear tetchy.. can we drop any issues, and just enjoy a ((((group hug)))) for a moment.... ((((hugs to everyone)))).

love you guys.

coz regardless of the ups and downs, this place is a little like the family i lost.... sometimes i need to take a step back, have a break and some quiet time, but that's ok, too.. every blessing to everyone,.