What Pushed You Out The Door Of The Watchtower?

by minimus 44 Replies latest jw friends

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  Lady Lee

  Oh boy where to start

  Abusive elder husband nearly drove me to suicide. When I realized I didn't want to die or be responsible for him committing adultery I went out and did the deed. And after him running around the house to get inside so he could have his "marital due" even though we were separated.

  After agonizing repetitions of my 1 time act vs his 15 years of abuse (to which he admitted in front of the elders) it came down to one question.

  If you had to do it all over, would you make the same choice?

  Well I had to think that one over. Given that I had an abusive husband and that I had no support and was so depressed that my suicide plan was getting very close to being acted on, I didn't see how I could have made any other choice. They decided I was unrepentant.

  Now if they had said "If we gave you the support you need, would you make the same choice?" my answer might have been different.

  But they made their decision which swept the whole thing under the carpet which was probably what they wanted anyways.
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  minimus

  Lady Lee, that's the easiest q&a you can get. They want you to say, "NO WAY". But you didn't. So they felt you might do it again and contaminate the congregation. Elders are men with no schooling, no professionalism, nada. Most have no clue of human nature. They just follow the script.
• 

  nicolaou

  Min', this is eerily similar to another thread you started last year - What Was "IT" That Finally Made You Leave The "Truth"?

  The replies showed that, for the most part, it was the unloving, uncaring attitude displayed by most of the 'brothers & sisters' - elders particularly. Some posters even made the point that this lack of love drove them out despite them harbouring fears that they might actually be leaving the Truth. Who here doesn't recognise and sympathise with those sentiments?

  But here's my question. Did anyone quit the JW's because of doctrine?

  Though I certainly saw the lack of genuine love for myself, the hypocrisy, gossip and the 'old boy network', none of that ever knocked my belief that this was 'Jehovah's Organisation'. I rationalised it all away on the basis that we are all imperfect. I figured that no amount of imperfect, sinful, human behaviour should cause me to lose trust in 'Jehovah's theocratic arrangement'.

  What did it for me was when I actually started to make a close examination of Bible teachings compared to Watchtower teachings. (There was a catalyst for this which I don't need to go into now.) I could make both sets of teaching harmonise if I followed WT reasoning, but there lay the problem - it was all so forced and circuitous.

  Examples: Daniel Ch 4, the 'other sheep', the literalness of the 144,000 and many others. Of course I found I couldn't have a free and open discussion about these things with my Mum or 'brothers and sisters'. I began to feel isolated and was soon on my way out.

  For me doctrine mattered - a lot!
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  minimus

  I do not believe in the "truth" because I know the doctrines are not truth. The FDS doctrine really always got to me. The ridiculousness of teaching the Revelation Climax crap took its toll and besides, once you read Ray Franz's books, you can't but help to intellectually see that the Watchtower is full of shit. I hope that answers your question.
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  daystar

  As a teen, I screwed up and fornicated. I was given an ultimatum and was surprised to find that I didn't feel as repentant as I thought I should have. The elders told me that I could no longer attend meetings.

  After a while to consider what had happened, I realized that they hadn't even tried to keep me in the fold. And that saddened me deeply. After all, I had grown up with these people.

  My screw-up initiated the move out. The elder's lack of "loving-kindness" kept me out... long enough to realize the horrible truth about the Society.
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  minimus

  I've never heard of elders telling you that you could no longer attend meetings. WTF?? How are you supposed to "come back"?
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  daystar

  Min

  Yeah, it was weird to me as well. I was an unbaptised publisher. They couldn't disfellowship me.

  They gave me two choices:

  1. Repent, or
  2. Stop attending meetings

  The elders on the JC were like family to me. I'd known them since I was two. This was the only time I had ever been in trouble about anything, ever. I was active in the service, gave talks, handled the mics, was otherwise considered upstanding.
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  minimus

  They obviously thought that their threats would make you see their way. Instead it turned you off. Good for you!
• 

  Dismembered

  
  Min,

  I'd die of old age typing about why. There's not enough room in cyberspace to explain.

  Dismembered

  "Gimme back my hat.. ya punk"
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  Cori

  It was bad treatment from the elders towards me and my family. That started it, then I found out about the pedophile issue and silentlambs.org and that sealed the deal.