Double Standards - Where is the line drawn?

by msil 55 Replies latest jw friends

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  teejay

  I've learned my lesson on Simon's board.

  good. any chance of you helping out your norwegian friend?
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  GinnyTosken

  good. any chance of you helping out your norwegian friend?

  I have several Norwegian friends. Do you mean Kent?

  If so, I do my best to help Kent, just as he has helped me learn many good lessons. I don't expect that you will have the same tolerance for him that I do.

  Have you ever played The Sims? In that game, when each person interacts, the game rates the encounter and shows you a running tally. A character you dislike might be a -20%. A good friend might be a +100%. Each encounter affects this balance.

  Kent and I have known each other for a long time. I've had many good encounters with him. I myself would not have posted that song. My esteem for Kent was lowered when he did so. Still, for me, the positive encounters outweigh the negative ones. That's how our friendship stands at the moment.

  After he did it, I asked him about it in the thread. Why did he do it? What did he hope to accomplish? He didn't answer.

  I wrote to him privately, and he explained. I am satisfied with his answer and accept it.

  I truly do believe that if someone offends you, the adult thing to do is to approach that person directly, explain how his/her behavior offended you, and discuss the matter. If Kent has offended you, I suggest you contact him directly.

  Kent is Kent; I am me. I cannot control Kent's behavior any more than you can control Bigboi's. I can only do my best to be a good influence.

  Ginny
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  teejay

  Fair enough, Ginny.

  I WILL say this: kent has not offended me.

  You may disbelieve this if you wish, but people have to matter to me for them to offend me. I simply find kent offensive in general. I have not 'known' him long, and the only contact I've had with him has been here, but based on that limited exposure, I think a case could be made that he's not a very nice man. He's either under-developed emotionally, with poor social skills, or he's just a mean, rude, man who cares little of other's feelings.

  In so doing, he fails to see that he undermines whatever good he does with behaviors I can only describe as evil. Reminds me of the Society. The parallels are obvious.

  I have no problem with your support, defense, excuse of him. You are his friend.
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  GinnyTosken

  Teejay,

  You have a right to form your own opinion of Kent. I cannot argue with that.

  However, in the case of Shelby/AGuest, I have neither defended him nor excused him. If you think that I have, I ask that you point out where I have done so. Like anyone else, Kent will have to accept the consequences of his behavior.

  Ginny
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  teejay

  If you think that I have, I ask that you point out where I have done so.

  Instead of saying, "I have no problem with your support, defense, excuse of him", I guess I should have said, "I have no problem with your support, defense, OR excuse of him."

  You're correct... my bad. You only "support" him.
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  GinnyTosken

  Teejay,

  Yes, I support him in the sense of offering help, comfort, and understanding. I do not support him in the sense of being in favor of or upholding everything he does.

  Kent is my friend. That does not mean that I always approve of his behavior. Nor does he always approve of mine.

  Ginny