by minimus 61 Replies latest jw friends
Why Do Inactive Ones Sometimes Go Back To The Organization?
I'm sure that many go back when they see that world events are very bad, and they get scared thinking that the end is close.
I'm sure that some really believe it's the truth, but they rather have a little fun before going back.
I would see this happen all the time. My 17-18 friends would leave, get pregnant, and come back because they had no where else to go. I ran into a friend of mine a couple months back, had not seen her in 15 years. We were best friends. I approached her at a restaurant. OMG, it was great seeing her up until I mentioned this site. She could not believe that I visited "apostate sites" and that I had no plans of returning to the org. She still had a drug problem, and had just got out of prison the day before. She was with her "sugar daddy". I couldn't believe what I was hearing, yet she was so offended that I did not want to return to the org ever, and I go to "apostate" sites where I have learned so much. Needless to say, have not heard from her since, nor do I want to hear from her. It was crazy.
Nikki
I meant to say my 17-18 year old friends, not my 17-18 friends....lol
Nikki
peer pressure or perhaps just plain stupidity and ignorance
I think they go back either because of fear (Armageddon) or feeling a loss of love (conditional) of family and friends.
Years ago I heard an elder brag that people stop coming to the meetings but seldom join another religion. He believed that once you know the "truth' you can never join another religion.
I have relatives that never attended but still believe it is the "truth" they just don't want to be one of jws, for numerous reasons. When they were younger they wanted to party, now that they are older they may join who knows, I guess they feel there is nothing fun left to do. Some attend the memorial occ but don't expect the jws to associate with them b/c they are not worthy. Talk about lack of self esteem
Really I think i have it, the WTS tries to lower your self esteem so much that you can't see a way out. You end up going back b/c you really do have no place else to go. .
For my part I would not go back b/c they really would not welcome us. it would be nice to be a part of "something" again, but now that I kow how many lies the tower is built on, it would never be the same. also jws are very suspicious of the inactive and those who are not "Whole-souled to jehovah". They will shun you and not let you into the inner circle. the ones who just show up occ look sad probably b/c they can"t figure out how to leave (don't have a support system) and don't have a support system in the org either. Their so called friends won't help, they will shun them. It is a sad place to be, so called inside the org and without friends and can't see a way to leave. Those that have "problem" behaviors and want to lead a lifestyle different than the wts teachs, well they really have it hard. They feel they don't measure up and yet can't find a place they feel accepted. The younger ones have the greatest chance of escaping, they can usually find friends and all. The older ones, who have life long friends , well, it is harder on them.
That's why if you are fading it is good to make new contacts, sports, volunteer, people at work, get to know the neighbors.
Rather than continue to let your JW family and elders do your thinking for you, start doing some research into the history of the WTS. Find out what abuse is.
Blondie
I agree that one must think about making new friends BEFORE leaving so that loneliness doesn't engulf a person.
I am inactive and have gone back and become inactive again. I never did any research before,believing all i would find was lies, but now i know better! But i used to feel so guilty about not doing "what was right", meetings etc that i'd go back eventually. But i soon used to find it all to hard to live up to, lack of warmth, not even wanting to walk into the hall i'd dread it all so much, and ministry would be the first thing to go as i did'nt feel right trying to get people interested in something i had doubts about.Even now, when someone came round recently and said i should be a good parent and go back to it all to save my childrens lives, i still had a bad dream that night and woke up the next day scared in case i was making a wrong decision and i think the problem is a part of you can wonder "what if they're right after all"? But what helps me is this site where i know people know what i mean because they've been there, buying the R Franz book and also finding courage to tell my non jw family and knowing i have their support - they didn't even say "i told you so!". Also my lovely husband, also inactive but supporting me in whatever decision i make. I do think fear drives alot to go back, and just the confusion of it all when you start doubting, its like the carpet being pulled from under your feet, and if you don't know where to go, you tend to return to something familiar.
Here is some advice for those who are struggling with staying out and have not yet determined whether the WT is or is not the true religion:
Research the organization from its very origin. When you see the crack pot teachings, flip flops in doctrines and other crazy things that went on even during the first President Russell's reign, you will know for sure that there is no way that this is God's organization that he solely entrusts to speak on his behalf! This helped me a lot.
You can also compare all the teachings that are unique to the WT to the New Testament and you will see how the WT twists scriptures out of context.
I guess it does come down to doing research. Kid A made a great point about changing your programming, you have to put the truth about the truth into your head to break down all the lies you have been taught.
Warlock -
the Christian faith is not and never was to be the same as God's dealings with the Isrealite nation. The laws given to them were all to point to Jesus and it is faith in him, not following rules and regulations that is not important. The real truth sets you free from any man or organization that tries to enslave you the way the Isrealites were enslaved under the heavy wieght of the Law Code. God knew they would not live up to it and that was the point of it, to show that man cannot do works to win or gain salvation. The WT continually brings out passages in the OT that have NOTHING to do with Christians. All the legalistic cults do the same thing. They do not want to be free from Law by preaching the simple message of faith in Christ because he freed us from slavery to man made rules including the rules of the WT, get it? They will loose all control over people. We (Christians) are united NOT by belonging to the same organization but by the indwelling of the Holy Spirit. No matter where we are in the world, or what church we attend, we belong to Jesus Christ. That is what is meant by being a Christian - follower of the teachings and belief in Jesus Christ.
Remember how the WT and Jehovah's Witnesses always mocked the churches that said that all you need is to believe in Christ and you will be saved? This is what the bible says. There is no other requirement. If we believe we will follow Christ's life as our example. There are no laws that bind us and we can be free to decide how to live our own life. To go back to the OT continually and God's dealings with the Isrealites is to go backwards to the old ways that are done away with. This is what the WT wants to do so that they can have control. Hope this helps, Lilly
Disclaimer: NO I do not believe only Christians will be saved. When I say saved, I am merely speaking of the first resurrection which is for those reigning with Christ. I believe God has a plan for everyone no matter what your religion is.
