THE REAL REASON FAMILY MEMBERS SHUN.........................

vitty

I think the real reason family members shun their "loved ones" is not because they love you and think it will bring you back, or that they are being obedient to God, but that you have totally embarrassed them, brought the family name into disrepute and it now brings into question how spiritual THEY are.

If they shun you, in their minds, they think the Elders, and dubs will not think less of them. Its all about what the "neighbours " think not what the bible teaches.

Its about PRIDE not LOVE.

What do you think?

Oh and it gives them brownie points to be used at armageddon.......................just in case.

Dansk

I don't have a problem with anything you said. My JW daughter thinks I'm the worst father in the world so shunning from a "spiritual" perspective gets her off the hook!

Ian

looking_glass

I also think in some people's case it allows them to feel superior. My guess is that many people have thought about doing what some DF'd people have done. If you act self righteous and pious, then clearly you are proving to everyone else that you would never do anything as dirty and/or unclean as that person.

I have never bought into the tough love approach that comes w/ the DF/DA shunning crap. I have yet to see it really work. Most people who return do it either because they really believe the religion is the right one and want back in or they do it because they don't want to be shunned by their family so they put on an act until they are reinstated and they they quickly fade.

Crumpet

think the real reason family members shun their "loved ones" is not because they love you and think it will bring you back, or that they are being obedient to God, but that you have totally embarrassed them, brought the family name into disrepute and it now brings into question how spiritual THEY are.

Vitty this may be the case at times, but I tend to think love would over rule pride especially for a child would it not? I believe my parents genuinely wanted it to bring me back when I was 16 and it did work and it worked again when I was in my early 20's. Now they still hope it will work, but their primary reason is to please Jehovah at all costs. They never cared about stance in the congregation - my dad would have made a great CO in my opinion but always kept a low profile - did not show off.

Y I Man

Afternoon all,

I think im quite fortunate in that I get on pretty well with my family now. It took a few years and they did shun me at first, im assuming it was to make a point in front of everyone. But now, I dont think they realy care what people think, they know i'll never go back to the meetings. They are a lot laid back now and im even going for lunch with my g/f on bank holiday Monday.

I do have a few questions for them, especially about the 1914 stuff & the scandal with the UN & WBTS that the Guardian newspaper published. I'll let you know what they say.

Gavin

lowden

My JW daughter thinks I'm the worst father in the world so shunning from a "spiritual" perspective gets her off the hook!

Bloody Hell Dansk!!

That must be really hard to deal with. I'm presuming she's been 'dirtied' by the WTS to get her to that state of mental blackness.

I have 3 sons, all thankfully free of the WTS.

It must break your heart. I really feel for you sunshine.

Peace

Lowden

hartstrings

You know how you felt when you studied really hard on a test and you looked across the room and caught your friend cheating. She wasn't caught and got an A and you hated her for it? I think this analogy works with dubs. They have been working so hard for some elusive prize of happiness because they've been told that's the way it has to be done. Then they see their sister get the prize of happiness and enjoyment of life after they leave and the dub feels cheated. What do they do with their jealousy? They turn it into a self-righteous shunning crusade.

jaguarbass

Different folks for different folks. some people may fit the profile you mention. Some folks may be sincere and naive.

Perry

PRIDE ... Yes that's it. And, especially it's child Contempt. Bad Religion & Bad Character = a very bad Life Cocktail.

just2sheep

for those of you who are shunned by your children,

if i were your child and you spent 20 to 40 years of my life indoctrinating me into what you consider the truth, and then you try to insist that your new light is that it was all a lie and i should now accept that; i would shun you too. how many of you spent your lives shunning others as an example to your children and then when it's your turn to be shunned cry and whine about it? the borg didn't come and get your children. you took your children and sacrificed them to the borg. you reap what you sow. it is hypocritical to think that the children you taught to shun others would now not shun you.

j2s

THE REAL REASON FAMILY MEMBERS SHUN.........................

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