Did you ever think you'd stop being one of Jehovah's Witnesses? (page 2)

XJW4EVR

I never thought I would ever leave. I figured I would fade, and be done with it, but other things conspiried against it.

Gill

I never knew there could be a wonderful life after that deep dark hole that was the Watchtower Society!

Now finally, I'm so glad to be alive and know what freedom is.

I was given a life sentence by my parents, born into that cult. But someone ripped the doors off my cell, and I found I had wings!

Thank you!

Up until 1995, I was a faithful witness without doubts. That change in doctrine blew my mind. I was only in for about 9 years at the time, but I knew it was extremely faith-shaking, and I was upset that others didn't pay it much attention.

After that, even though the Mind Control sessions (meetings and assemblies) kept me in line, I was never really the same. Eventually, I knew I would have to look at the organization from the outside. It only took more than 10 years to get up the nerve to do that.

Abandoned

This is an interesting question. For me it wasn't "would I ever leave," it's "when will I finally fit in?" When you are required to reprove your dedication to god every day, it's impossible to ever feel that you have any intrinsic worth. So, I didn't really think about leaving, I was constantly worried about when they were going to kick me out.

It's been about four years since I last attended a meeting at the kingdom hall and I'm finally able to talk about this. Instead of being ashamed of this part of my life, I'm angry that what the wt does is legal. I'm still a little fuzzy on what I ACTUALLY believe right now, but the one thing I KNOW is that for the rest of my life, part of my service to my fellow man will be warning people about this corrupt organization.

moshe

I thought I had a life sentence at the WT penal colony. When I got a a chance for a jail break in 1988, I escaped. Can't believe I took the BS as long as I did.

XU

I never thought I would leave. I used to be scared that my friends would lose their faith and always ask them about it. I guess I was just thinking about my own doubts, but couldn't look at myself honestly yet. I used to fantasize when I grew up I would move to a congregation that didn't know me, then maybe fade, but I kept that vision blurry on purpose.

Woofer

I never thought I would leave, although I never took great joy in being a Witnoid either. I guess I thought the end would come when I was a teenager.

When I first got d/f I was "ashamed" and if I saw another JW I would feel bad for days. Luckily that feeling as passed. Now when/if I see a Witness I feel proud and imagine that they are secretly envious of me because of my freedom (which they probably are anyways).

Zico

No. Pre-March/April, when I started to find out the Truth about the Truth, my ambition was to go to MTS.

In fact, this became an on and off ambition till about July, when I finally accepted they had it completely wrong, and decided to work towards getting out. I've been fading ever since.

AK - Jeff

Nope. I was dyed-in-the-damn-wool, if ever there was one.

I had never stolen, cheated on my spouse, or even gotten drunk, in my whole life. Still haven't, come to think of it. [Well, there was that one time when I drank a little too much - but never was drunk.]

I owe my basic moral structure to the organization, though I am relatively sure I would have been 'religious' and towed the mark, no matter if I had ever heard of Jw's. Religion was just normal to me, when it wasn't to others. Ironically, though I profess Christianity now, I am un-churched and don't really see that changing in the near future. I am now able to discern the general hypocricy in organized religion, a result of careful scutiny of the one I always viewed as 'Truth'.

I wore the badge proudly - but now would not be found dead inside a Kingdom Hall. Honestly, one of the reasons [though perhaps not the major one] that I chose to DA rather than face the JC, was my vow to never set foot inside the devil's den again. It sickens me to the point of nearly getting nauseated to think of ever being in a KH again - though I have considered doing so on vacation to obtain some of the latest literture for my apostate library.

Jeff

anewme

No I never dreamed I would walk away from the JWs. It was my life. But.........something was missing.
In my heart I have always wanted happy family life.

I felt all the forced meetings and forced weekend field service were working against my happy family life.
When my husband started to get ultra zealous and fanatical about the meetings and field service and donate our every waking moment to the society, a little voice inside my heart said this is not how I want to spend my life and the next 20 years, a slave soldier of the Watchtower and a victimized wife of a fanatical religious person.

I remember one particular Sunday afternoon, very blustery like today. Husband insisted we set the example for others and go back out in the ministry after the morning meeting. I had already told him I was not well. It was difficult enough to drag myself to the meeting that morning (against my own will) and now I was being nagged to join him in "calls" afterwards. No lunch he says, just an hour of F.S. and then we will go home.
He wanted to do some Not At Homes to complete his territory, find people home and check them off his list and turn in the territory. It was very cold. The wind went right through my clothes. He found lots of his NH home. One man wanted to argue with my husband. Together they enjoyed arguing for close to two hours on the door step (or so it felt) I just coughed and coughed and gagged and swooned behind the husband the whole time.

To make a long dumb story shorter, the next day I checked into the doctors with pneumonia! My chest felt like a truck was parked on it! I knew I was sick but was not allowed to make the decision for myself to stay home from the meeting and F.S.

It was then I realized something was wrong. Something had changed in my marriage and in my husband.
I realized then that I needed to use common sense and safe guard my health first. I felt like nobody really cared about ME. ME did not matter. My husband believed only Jehovah mattered. I came to believe over the next two years that my husband and his JW family would rather see me dead and faithful than free and happy.

Well the events that led up to my booting, I mean departure, are history now. Even amusing to me.
But the point is I got out! Im free! And I am pursuing the happy family life I sought for so long!

Did you ever think you'd stop being one of Jehovah's Witnesses?