Ow, what a horrid e-mail to get. Vindictive, rub it in your nose kinda person isnt she?
update on my divorce situation
by depressed 62 Replies latest jw experiences
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SPAZnik
CUT.
YOUR.
LOSSES. -
MsMcDucket
Would it make you feel better if his parents started shunning him? We all find it so strange that many parents or loved ones can so easily turn against their children. Maybe, in this case, they aren't. They are going to continue loving their child no matter what. They know that you are angry because of the extramarital affair, but you're not their child.
If they are protecting their son, that's just the way it is. They don't love you; they love him.
You've got to go on with your life and stop trying to bring him down. As long as you're attacking the other woman, she will continue to counter-attack. It's just kind of like a normal human reflex. She knows that you are trying to break up their relationship and cause trouble, and so does his parents.
Take a step back and look at it from their side. They don't want their son to be disfellowshipped. The other woman is just that the other woman and she's not giving up her man without a fight. You have the papers on him, but she has the man.
Let her have him. What goes around comes around.
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JWdaughter
Get a good settlement from him and be grateful you are rid of the so-and-so. Seriously, you live in NYC-there are lots of men, and many of them are irreligious to a PERFECT fault:) Or religious, if that is what you want. And you can forget men altogether and re-focus your life to find activities and interests that you want to be involved with. No permission needed, no input from anyone else. You have it made. No matter what else happens, you are not in a bad marriage with a cheater anymore. MUCH better off than you were a year ago. Thank God or nature and don't just move on, SKIP joyfully along your new path, it could be a really wonderful trip to take.
Whatever happens with him or his family really won't be impacted by you at this point. His family knows what is going on. They are dealing with it the way they know how. Forget them. You will probably find out all the sad and pathetic details over time, and you will just shake your head, wondering how you could have ever been involved with such a skunk. And then you will sigh happily as you live your own happy and fulfilled life. And if she IS having twins at 46, she is likely getting what she deserves already:) As wonderful as kids are, they are a heck of a lot of hard work. And they and your husband are her mess to deal with now. HA!
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depressed
I wonder - how do people change so drastically? My soon to be ex husband used to love me, and he'd tell me. We never once had a fight were divorce was even mentioned. He used to tell me that he loved me everyday. Now he's laughing at my pain with the bitch. I don't understand how his conscience doesn't bother him - especially being raised in the borg. He must be really evil now if he's laughing at my pain, and using my pain as an indication of how "touched in the head" I am.
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Sunspot
I wonder - how do people change so drastically? My soon to be ex husband used to love me, and he'd tell me. We never once had a fight were divorce was even mentioned. He used to tell me that he loved me everyday. Now he's laughing at my pain with the bitch.
Have you considered that he might not have been who you thought he was? Some people don't change overnight---we just find out they have been living a lie overnight. Fighting is not always an indication of something wrong. Indifference also acts the same way. Some guys are real rats and you never know there's any problem until they up and walk out. Been there-done that.
It hurts MORE because you HAD no clue....at least when they leave after a period of arguing and being snots....you are not as shocked! I can certainly sympathize with you.....don't get me wrong here...but it WILL be better for YOU if you just wash your hands of this jerk and chalk it up to experience.
It seems as if these two are a perfect match for each other and any "bliss" will be short-lived. They are starting off on the wrong foot and that dance won't last long....and new baby twins will complicate a lot of things for these newlyweds, haha! I think YOU will come up smelling like a rose----and THEY will just come up smelling.
Keep us posted!
hugs,
Annie
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depressed
sunspot, thanks for your warm words.
His whore other woman had sent me another email where she tells me that she was just lying and that she's just his friend. Yeah, "just friends" co sign on car loans, and they kiss each other in the office.
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Odrade
Oh good grief. I went back and read your other two threads, and see this thing started OVER A YEAR AGO, and here you are STILL forwarding letters, and emails, trying to get him in trouble with his family, the elders, workmates, bosses, etc. For what? So you can vindicate yourself? You have acted like as much of a fool as they have with your letters, your blog, and your vindictiveness.
Just stop. Let go of the ex, let go of the in-laws. You've dealt out enough "revenge" by now, there's nothing left for "karma." They've pretty much paid in full by having to deal with you.
I can't help but think that the fact you're still behaving so vengefully and childishly over a year after all of this stuff, (which seems to have been escalated by you in the first place, after all he did move out in short order, but it was YOU who tried to ruin everyone else's lives by divulging secrets of even people who have nothing to do with you,) perhaps your behavior holds the clue as to why he left you in the first place.
Regardless, get help, before you destroy yourself trying to take everyone else out.
Personally, I didn't see anything particularly heinous about the email in the original post on this thread. I'm irritated enough by YOUR side of your behavior to have written you a much meaner one. I can only imagine what the real story would tell. She showed remarkable self-restraint, IMO.
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MsMcDucket
Depressed, I feel your pain. I don't want you to think that I don't care. It's just that I have 6 sisters and 6 brothers and neices that are just a little younger than me. I've seen the hurt. It's all most unbearable. You can get pass this. You've got to get your mind on something else. You just have to!
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depressed
wow, odrade that was so mean..
Not sure what to tell you except that everyone is different. I highly doubt that you've gotten cheated on by what you thought was your "faithful" husband of ten years. You know, that's a trauma in itself. One year is not sufficient time for most people to get over something as drastic as what happened to me. Remember, this whole thing happened suddenly.
Odrade - I'll get over it when I'm good and ready. No offense to you, but my choice is my choice. And if I want to prove him to be a liar, then that is my choice as well. I'm glad that I'm growing confidentally this way. Negative opinions just do not influence me any longer. That's what 10 years of pioneering, and 5 years of bethel service does to ya.