I have raised five teenagers and have a sixth still in school in another city best suited for his particular living with Asperger's Syndrome. There IS no way to describe the experience of raising teens....even the non-rebellious ones tend to give you serious flak at times.
You CAN take all the time you want to, to deliver whatever she may have left behind. (tough tomatoes) It is all up to YOU as the sole custodial parent. The grass is always greener on the other parent's side....and I'll just be willing to bet that things may have quite a turnaround the second things become sticky with Daddy at HIS house....and she may just not see where living with YOU was such a "bad thing" all along!
We had one daughter that did this three times because we didn't allow her to do something that was waaaay beyond what we permitted as parents....with her OR the other kids. She ended up running away and then taking us to court when she found a willing parent of a classmate that would take her in.....but IN court, when the jugde asked some questions of her....it "came out" that what she had told everyone was NOT the truth of the matter.....and that WE didn't throw her out into the street one night,
but SHE ran off DURING the night and we had no clue where she had gone (again). Our home was and had been, open to he whenever she wanted to come back. She had also told people that we had gone to a JW assembly...had come back and threw all her belongings into the parking lot of the motel....because she wouldn't get baptized the next morning! Some of the stories she told were quite unbelievable, let me tell you!
We can laugh about it NOW....but at the time we never knew what was going to happen next.....right down to the night TWO police cars pulled up like on COPS...screeching to a halt....and very BIG and very TALL cops banged on the door and demanded to come in. A very business-like and snotty lady with a clipboard....came in after them and with our daughter...demanding HER things....
saying SHE had "rights" to her stuff....even though hubby said that HE had PURCHASED all...her stuff....and what happened to OUR "rights".....but the threat of arrest kept us quiet and very compliant as she got ""all her stuff". We shook for hours after everyone left that night.
But things DO have a way of working out....we are all friendly now, and get along beautifully. She is a very beautiful 38 year old woman with so much artistic talent and skills that it makes it hard to believe that *I* gave birth to her! I enjoy her and who she is as a woman. It CAN happen in your family too! Just hang in there!
hugs,
Annie
