I'm Attending the Memorial (page 5)

rebel8

Each congregation is different of course, but in mine they loved it when inactives or DFd people came to visit, all tatooed and pierced. They seized upon it as an opportunity to prove how people "go off the deep end" when they leave the Borg, how Satan's influence on "the world" is evident, etc.

There was no apparent jealousy or sadness that the inactives were having a good life. Even when they said they are enjoying their career or making a decent income, that was seen as evidence that Satan has tricked them.

They also said meeting attendance was evidence that the person "knows the truth" and still longs to be a jw.

Maybe the younger jws in your cong, who have had less brainwashing time, may be positively influenced somehow.

jgnat

You guys...Richie is not asking for our permission! Like, I squeaked when he got his third tattoo, and see where that went! I love him anyways no matter how many tattoos and piercings he has, because that is what real moms do. Richie is Richie and he will be the man he is. He'll go.

I predict that nothing bad will happen. His girlfriend will be beautiful and gracious. She will receive at least three invites to the coming life-saving talk from well-meaning biddies. The spinster sisters will be spitting nails with their eyes. The single guys will all be furiously admiring, plotting their exit shortly after the Memorial. The parents will be oblivious, too busy keeping Johnny and Susie from squirming in the hot crowd. Momma will fall away in a dead faint. The elders will be jumpy and suspicious but will do nothing to interfere until Richie pulls out his camera-phone.

tijkmo

i thought about doing something like this too

then i thought again.

diamondblue1974

I predict that nothing bad will happen. His girlfriend will be beautiful and gracious. She will receive at least three invites to the coming life-saving talk from well-meaning biddies. The spinster sisters will be spitting nails with their eyes. The single guys will all be furiously admiring, plotting their exit shortly after the Memorial. The parents will be oblivious, too busy keeping Johnny and Susie from squirming in the hot crowd. Momma will fall away in a dead faint. The elders will be jumpy and suspicious but will do nothing to interfere until Richie pulls out his camera-phone.

With your predictions, have you considered setting up a premium rate telephone number for personal readings and horoscopes LOL!

I can see all you are saying coming true Jgnat, its uncanny given that you were never a witness

Gary

undercover

I've only skimmed thorugh the responses...I see some say "go for it" and others say "bad idea".

I have a question...Have you been specifically invited to the Memorial, either by your mom or your grandmorther? Are you still in contact with either of them enough that they have expressed a desire for you to come?

If so, then I say as well, go for it and do exactly as you planned, complete with piercings and your GF in killer dress. Be yourself, don't apologize for who you are or what you are. But going shows that you respect your mom or grandmother enough to do this one thing for them.

If, however, your contact with them has been little or none and there has been no expression of wanting you to come or even expecting you to come, then maybe it would be better to let sleeping dogs lie. You've seperated yourself from the life that you hated before, why stir up a hornets nest unduly? You've made your break. No one expects anything from you anymore as far as JW traditions go. Your unexpected apprearance may upset and embarrass your mother more than you think. Remember, this is her religion and while it may be a fucked up religion, she has every right to follow it and enjoy it without harrassement. Why, subconsciously maybe, try to ruin it for her?

Just a couple of things to think about, but hey it's your decision. Do what you feel is best for you. Good luck, dude.

MinisterAmos

Meh, go. Try to get a BJ in the library or something......

RichieRich

Sorry to start something so controversial and then walk away from the computer...

You will be talked about, but not in any positive light. The most frequently used word will be 'worldly', maybe even 'demonic'. I do not see how this will aid anyone, unless it somehow does aid you.

Since several people expressed a sentiment similar to that, I'll give a general response...

The ways I have changed myself are my way of establishing myself as myself. I know, and had always calculated the risks of how these actions will alter people's opinions of me. I'm sure I will be labeled with a horrible JW buzzword. But I'm forcing them to do that. It was my choice to do what I've done. I welcome their judgements. And this does aid ME. Its hard to explain, but it's something I need.

If, however, your contact with them has been little or none and there has been no expression of wanting you to come or even expecting you to come, then maybe it would be better to let sleeping dogs lie. You've seperated yourself from the life that you hated before, why stir up a hornets nest unduly? You've made your break. No one expects anything from you anymore as far as JW traditions go. Your unexpected apprearance may upset and embarrass your mother more than you think. Remember, this is her religion and while it may be a fucked up religion, she has every right to follow it and enjoy it without harrassement. Why, subconsciously maybe, try to ruin it for her?

I haven't spoken with either of them in almost a year. In that 10 months or so, I went through some emotional flaming hoops to keep my sanity. Remember, I was torn about being a Witness for years before I even left, so I've been in pain for a while (although, for the record, I feel completely fine now).

I first felt guilty, that I had left my mother's love. That was until I realized my mother gave me up, not vice versa. So why should I hide my face to protect anyone? What's the worse that can happen? She has to make eye contact with me and in that brief moment acknowledge her shortcomings? Personally, I don't think that will hurt her any more than I've been hurt.

Is that petty? yes.

Is it spiteful? mm hmm.

Is it healing? time will tell.

And Crumpet, thanks for your synopsis of what will be going through everyone's head.

Gill

Richie! Now is the time to look forward! Never look back! Never step backwards!

Many of us here have had to lose the love of our parents because of the bOrg! You have nothing to prove to them! Only go if you must, but it really isn't necessary!

RichieRich

You have nothing to prove to them!

But this is for me!!!

It's something I want to do.

tall penguin

"It's something I want to do."

Then go for it. I think it's useful sometimes to go back to the past and see how it feels. To revisit situations with new eyes. Shows us how far we've come.

tall penguin

I'm Attending the Memorial

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