I'm Attending the Memorial

by RichieRich 117 Replies latest jw friends

  • megsmomma
    megsmomma

    Richie-Rich.....attending the memorial can be a very good experience in reiterating that you have done the right thing. I went about 4 years back. I went with 2 of my disfellowshipped friends who used to attend the KH we went to. (So, people knew of us) We got all dressed up (but were modest and respectfull) It scared me to see the girls like that because we looked like Dubs!

    Well....we walked in and I saw all the "brothers and sisters" greeting eachother in the way they do....Hand shake...fake smile...."so good to see you brotha"....all the fakeness really hit me......and I started to lose it.....cracking up/on the verge of hyseria......So I made a bee-line for the exit with my friends in tow to compose myself. When we sat there for the talk, it was the SAME OLD THING. I started reading around the scriptures they were reading and saw they just picked and choose whatever to support whatever they were getting at. That was my first step in finally NOT believing they were the truth.

    After the whole thing a baptised young brother "slipped" the youngest of my companions his number. (Hitting on her) He came over to try to get into her pants later that night as we had to go home and drink some wine!! (He was not successful!)

    I hope it re-iterates for you that you are on the right path too!! I have never had the desire after that to EVER go back to a meeting of theirs.

  • brunnhilde
    brunnhilde

    Good for you, RR. I really respect that you're listening to YOURSELF and recognizing what you need to do for closure or completeness or whatever. Maybe I'm misreading it, but it sounds like this isn't really about the dubs at all. More like you're proving something to yourself? Not about them possibly being right, but more that you are complete and whole and strong without them, or maybe I'm just blowing smoke *grin*! Anyhow, hope it goes well and be sure to tell us the juicy details! Oh, who am I kidding. It's Memorial, it will be dull and obnoxious and RR will be the highlight of the evening!!

  • JWdaughter
    JWdaughter

    Richie, you know I like your style-so to speak;) I fully understand what you are attempting to do. I SO get it. My only caution is that I think you are still pretty angry-don't go unless you are sure that you will not be causing the scene (that your presence will is a given!). I think it is great to shake them up a little, let them know you haven't grown horns (exactly. . .) and that you still dress nicely. . .Oh, and that you have a sweet girl who love you and supports you. If you are so angry that you have any inclination to start a scene (meaning overtly, not just by your presence), then you might want to wait a year or two. If you are ~cool~ about it though, go for it. Take a big dose of no-doze first if you don't want to cause a scene by your snoring! Or take drammamine if that is the only way you can get through it! Whatever works, my dear!

    You are really being kind of nice in this you know, the only drama those people get is waiting for those "very special announcements" and of course, seeing who has decided they are annointed in 'these end times'.

    Your friend,

    Shelly (who is sending your GF a hug for being a great support for you!)

  • Crumpet
    Crumpet
    I haven't lost my couth.

    a) I love your way with words

    Plus, I look REALLLLLY good in a suit.

    b) I love your way without words.

  • scotsman
    scotsman

    Hey Richie

    Good luck, but... if i read correctly you haven't had contact with your mon and gran for 10 months. Seeing them may make you blub like a baby and may not feel like closure. Closure in 10 months after 18 years would be a frickin' miracle too.

    I went through all sorts of plans when I left from knocking back all the wine at the memorial to turning up at an assembly in drag (looking fabulous but fierce). I have no regrets about not doing them.

    But again, best of luck.

  • LittleToe
    LittleToe

    Scots:
    You took the words out of my mouth...

    .

    ...except the thing about drag...

    .

    .

    .

    ...I leave that for Maunday Tuesdays!

    Richie:
    Its never good to see a superhero blub into the wine

  • Crumpet
    Crumpet

    He will cry when he gets home. The experience almost certainly will elicit that. And THAT is what is therapeutic - its facing the source of your pain - which isnt the kingdomhall - its his mother and granny. This is the only way he will ever get to see them and he is doing it the only way, which is on their territory. Teauirs help bring closure so long as they are induced the right way. And this is the right way for Richie. Good on him for figuring all this out - took me like 18 years, embarassingly and now its really too late to undo the mess I made.

  • DamienL
    DamienL

    I say hire a devil outfit and turn up with the horns. The look on their face would be a beutiful picture lol

  • asleif_dufansdottir
    asleif_dufansdottir

    Richie,

    I just saw this thread and wanted to say, if I ever decided I wanted to go to a meeting again the memorial would be the very last meeting I'd pick.

    Why? Because the memorial is the one meeting a year that people who "are afraid to make the commitment of being real JWs" go to, "because they really know it's the truth(tm)".

    They'll read it as you wanting to be all evil and worldly but unable to deny that the JWs have the truth and 'knowing' that you 'need' to attend the memorial.

    They won't see it as you showing that you've survived and thrived away from J's Org. They'll view it as vindication that 'even those who hate J's Org know it's the truth and come to the memorial.'

    I'd pick another meeting. Like on your birthday, cause you wanted to say hi to your mom on the anniversary of your birth

  • LoverOfTruth
    LoverOfTruth

    Oftentimes, going to a meeting will help you realize you don't ever want to be part of this Organization ever again. It's different when you've been out for awhile getting your head cleared up. You realize how wierd these people really are.

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