Is your goal to have the shunning stop? If you limit it to that, a straigt forward discussion about hypocracy with misses "sex addicted" may just do some good in having her become more humble and to have her change her posture with your sister. Beyond that anything you do will have unintended consequences for the innocent. Not a burden you wll enjoy! carmel
Sister Pioneer and Her 10 Year Secret of Porneia
by bluesapphire 91 Replies latest jw friends
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BizzyBee
Someone tell me not to do it. Someone tell me how wrong it would be and that they would be disappointed in me.
Don't do it. It would be very wrong. I would be disappointed in you.
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Highlander
Focus on your friend/"brother", everything else will sort itself out.
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bluesapphire
I think I choose the high road here. If ever I come face to face with the little hypocroite and she shuns me or tries to humiliate me then my mouth will open and call a spade a spade. If Ricky opens up or starts talking about it again Ill tell him what I think he needs for peace of mind. And finally if the day ever comes where my sister talks to me and if she ever bings this woman up Ill tell her what I know and the burden will become my sisters to do with as she pleases. I am not going to look for these opportunities. If they happen to come along then karma will take its course.
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Save My Soul
Wow, I posted a similar topic some time ago.
http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/6/128970/1.ashx
Many pioneer women are having sex. Many have done it for years and have secrets. Sex in the org is a hot but hidden topic. Most people always tell at least one person.
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asleif_dufansdottir
Well I guess I'm just not a very noble person because I'd tell.
At a minimum I'd tell my sister. And I'd give serious consideration to writing a letter to Sister Pioneer about how her behavior (openly confessing porneia to a study??) caused you to be stumbled and tell her she's a hypocrit for encouraging your sister to shun you.
But I'm kind of a "harsh light of day" person.
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cognizant dissident
Well, I can understand your desire to see miz self-righteous, high and mighty dubette get what she deserves. However, I agree with Wanderer. Outing someone for whatever reason can set into motion a chain of events that once started could have disastrous repercussions and be unstoppable.
This is a worst case scenario, but it is not unheard of for mentally unbalanced people to kill themselves at the thought of public shame and humiliation. Those with the biggest ego's and the most "image conscious" also have the most to lose with public exposure. How would you feel if your revelations were the spur for such an action on her part? Would that be more come-uppance than you had planned or hoped for.
What of the devastation of children from broken families?
What if her husband were to beat her or kill her in a jealous rage?
I know the chances of these outcomes may be small, but I personally know of witnesses who have killed themselves for less and ones who have murdered their wives. So it could happen. Why risk it for a moment of personal satisfaction?
As a general rule, I think is not a good idea to play with other people's lives.
Cog
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Dawn
bluesphire - I understand totally your feeling.
Take the high road, like you said. Eventually she will pay for her actions. She may already be and you just dont know it. She may have stress, health problems, etc. Some how, karma always gets them in the end. I've seen it over and over again. Just do what you believe is the right thing to do. If you can be proud of yourself and how you have handled it, then that's what matters most.
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mouthy
Maybe you could even tape the conversationBecare ful about doing the above..Could end you in deep waters it is against the law in some places
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Crumpet
Great thread and very interesting responses. My initial response would be to stir away - but thats my evil side. I would say it would be a blessed relief for her child and husband to escape her self-righteous attitude personally. However apart from telling your own sister I dont think you have course or reason to tell anyone else. Your sister needs to know because she has chosen a bad person for a role model. You were never sworn to secrecy about her sexual shennanigans.
No wonder this woman advocates your shunning - she wants to the minimise the risk of you blabbing to anyone that could shake the pedestal she has jumped on.
Nevertheless I think you do have to leave it to karma.
Having said that - a little note through her door saying "I know what you did last summer" might be just as effective.
Oh jeez - I am evil! I think you and I could have a fantasy revenge party! The important thing is not to dwell on it over much because it just makes you bitter. I know this from personal experience. When I see terrible behaviour from one human to another it can keep me up for weeks. I'm learning its much better to let go.