FOR THOSE UNFORTUNATE ENOUGH TO BE GOING TO THE ASSEMBLY, HERE'S SOME TIPS: (page 3)

greendawn

A little bit of wine to make one sleepy and relaxed would be the best way to deal with an assemly th emind can travel somewhere more pleasant as the body has to be present at the boring and pointless JW gathering.

veen

My mate did the straw thing, but with chewed up paper so it would stick to whatever it made contact with. The noise was quite noticeable which made it more difficult to keep a straight face. I once read 'Mr Nice' by Howard Marks throughout an entire 3 day convention without anyone saying a thing. The point about the best seats is so true. I once turned up at between 7-7.30am for a whole convention. There was not one row of seats that were not taken at the back on any level of an entire football stadium. One of my favorite things to do was sing harmonies to all the songs. One year was totally golden though. Myself and three other muso friends perfected barbershop style harmonies over the course of the weekend. At the end of the last song on the Sunday we hit a beaut of a chord and held it after everyone else stopped singing, at which point my girlfriend elbowed me in the solar plexus causing me to let out a significantly loud 'heurrgh!' which reverberated around the stadium. The people in the row in front were pissing themselves laughing throughout the never ending prayer. It makes me wish I was going.

Mary

LOL @ veen!!

Bumblebee said: Hey - you're going one day right? I'm game if you are!! lol

You wanna shoot the peas or cross your legs?

bigdreaux

i went to the convention one year, tweaked out on rockstar energy drinks and yellow jacket energy pills. i was determined to stay awake. i wound up just grinding my teth and contemplating leaving because i was so fidgety. lol

karvel

GREAT stuff Mary. i personally plan taking my hip flask and getting drunk as soon as they start the text.

nvrgnbk

YOU DA WOMAN Mary!

SirNose586

Awww, I wish I had this advice before my convention! Mine just ended. I could've seriously worked the Attendant angle....

Ours was in a stadium, so no pea shooting...

Great stuff, Mary! Oh yes, I did amuse myself by noting the plunging necklines and the not-quite-#3-ready skirts. Thank goodness for the chicks who don't follow the WT rules!

eclipse

LMAO at veen, that was an awesome story to read, I burst out laughing!

Mysterious

Anyone every gone in very worldly attire? Sisters in jeans with pink mohawks? What woudl they do as supposedly it is open to the public.

SnakesInTheTower

Jim_TX

P.S. This only works at JW conventions. Do not try this at presidential conferences, or NRA conventions.

OMFG I just about died when I read that.

I am seriously thinking about buying a laser pointer now that this has been pointed out. Already have binoculars.....and I have video camera that has a nice zoom saves to a DVD..... perfect for shooting action shots of "Stupid JW Tricks"..... was thinking of not going at all, but hell, this could be the most fun I've ever had at a convention (since I dont have to do food service, attendant, cleaning, parking, accounting, security, or any of the other crap I used to ~~volunteer~~ get drafted for......but at least I did not have to sit through the damn thing bored).

Don't forget the earlier thread about printing up fake checks and Monopoly money and stuffing the donation boxes with 'em... I'm going to Kinkos and getting them done in color so they really look good, especially the checks..

SnakesInTheTower (of the "finally having fun" Sheep Class)

FOR THOSE UNFORTUNATE ENOUGH TO BE GOING TO THE ASSEMBLY, HERE'S SOME TIPS:

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