my profile

by BlackSwan of Memphis 23 Replies latest jw friends

• 

  Sad emo

  Hi BlackSwan

  I hear what you say. The backbiting and ridicule has been getting to me the last few months too. It's just I dunno ... disheartening to see it happening, often when there's no real need for it.

  I wish you peace

  theinfamousone - venting is fine and this is an excellent place to do it, but does it ever need to be at the expense of other poster's feelings? Aren't they entitled to their space to heal also, without being 'looked down upon' by other posters?

  I wish everyone here peace and healing
• 

  BlackSwan of Memphis

  You guys aren't making this easy, lol.

  Crumpet, and you know you have a right to say as you please. That was one of those things that as JW's we don't have the right to do.

  I just think that sometimes we are all moving in different directions and sometimes we get to a point where what once was not as much of an issue becomes a bigger issue. I hope that in time I can find even more peace so that I can find an inner balance that doesn't need to be guided by either or. I.e. either I'm posting or not. Right now, I don't have that. And that is all me baby. I know that. I miss you Crumpy. You are such a sweety.

  Poppers, thank you. I haven't even thought of it as me growing or not growing. Just changing, morphing. I appreciate your words a great deal!!

  Emo, hey there girlie. Yeah, you get it. I think that at times I am waaaaaaaayyyyyyy too sensitive and I readily acknowledge this. I see a poster here get knocked around a bit and my heart breaks for them. Some of the posters here have taught me ALOT about how to treat people and I am forever indebted to them. I have been a brat at times and have been called on it. Either here or privately.

  I do wish that we could all express opinions without it turning into a flame throwing contest. But life isn't like that. And as I said I can be really too sensitive at times.

  Ok....I am off to walk.

  If I miss comments, I just want people to know, I check in. I check to see how my friends are doing. I worry about you guys.

  take care
• 

  juni

  you have a PM BlackSwan ~

  Beautifully expressed HappyDad!
• 

  Warlock

  BSM,

  My opinion is, there is no need to apologise.

  Why apologise for words of truth?

  I think it gets to all of us in varying degrees.

  Warlock
• 

  HappyDad

  I agree with Black Swan 100% +

  You MUST move forward! But to those who have family still in...........that can be somewhat hard to do.

  ME? I have absolutely no one in the Borg except for some in-laws (my late wife's family who have no contact with me whatsoever even though I'd like to talk to them)

  Neither I nor my daughter want to look back. Those years had more BS than a cattle ranch! The JW religion is only a vague memory to us. Our life today is filled with joy with the occasional sucker punch that comes along in everyones life.

  But.......I still want to keep up on what is going down in Brooklyn and always want to help suffering ones in any way I can.

  Just because I have moved on doesn't mean that I won't listen to those who bitch and moan (sometimes TOO much.. about their lot in life). I can handle it! Like Black Swan said......Go forward! Hopefully.......one day.........you will.

  Not a single one person will be able to take the WT down. Leave that in God's hands. (or whatever else you believe a higher power is).

  Be the master of your own destiny. Constantly bitching about what the Borg has done and is still doing does nothing but make you unhappy. You can't stop it! But do yourself a favor and live your life better and better starting today.

  An example I can use is the Jews who had to go to the camps under Hitler. So many of them saw much more family devistation than any ex JW could imagine. They saw torture and death. And the ones who survived the camps went on to have productive lives. BUT.......THEY DIDN'T FORGET! Instead of bitching......they EDUCATED everyone they could about the atrocities. The WT is just as guilty of atrocities as those that happend back then......but in a somewhat different way. People and families were still destroyed, but we as ex JW's need to educate all the people we can about the WT atrocities. Not just bitch about OUR OWN LOT IN LIFE. Self pity never amounts to anything.

  Do what you have to do and if you are the loser so to speak in the JW WTBTS fight.........then leave it and your snubbing family alone. Find a new family and a new life. It can be done. Why stay in the mud hole? Get out and get cleaned up ........ for your own sake.

  It's your life. Do want you want with it. Continually jumping back into the fire is only destroying you...no one else!

  I wish you all happiness,

  HappyDad
• 

  freedomloverr

  I hear you loud and clear BSofM.
  
  It different for everyone but I don't *need* the board as much as I used to. For me I can't put energy into talking and thinking about jw things and still move forward in this journey. that's just me though.....
  
  I've been thinking about you girl. been meaning to email you and make sure things were okay.
  
  keep in touch - okay?
  
  love and peace to you - freedomlover
• 

  SnakesInTheTower

  BSOM

  I am currently a dub....fading, and doing so faster than I expected...mostly because of the support of those here. both in PMs and on board comments. (thank you)

  I see your point about moving on of course and understand completly...but I also am glad everyone here has not moved on. If that had happened, there would be no JWD, no place for lurkers... who become posters.... then faders.... then out of the Borg....to go for support. I (personally only) almost feel an obligation to hang around JWD to help others just as some of you are helping me now. That was my point of being an elder...to help others...so if I can do that here...., then maybe my time in the Borg has not been a complete waste of my life.

  If you do truly decide to stop posting, please understand that I am grateful for you and those like you who did spend a 2-3 years here helping those like me before moving on.

  Wherever your journey takes you, I for one hope it is a good one..

  SnakesInTheTower (of the "grateful for your support" Sheep Class)
• 

  darth frosty

  I agree with warlock, Just live your life and enjoy your freedom. We must do for ourselves. What I mean by that is we all are not at the same place. As has been posted many times there are steps that you go thru on your way out. These range from anger and fear until you get to final resolution. Where one person or poster is cant compare to another in the linear stream of time.
  
  I have always loved this thought from JT
  EVERYONE CAN'T BE IN THE FRONT ROW!
  
  Life is a theater - Invite your audience carefully. Not everyone is healthy enough to have a front row seat in our lives. There are some people in your life that need to be loved from a distance. It's amazing what you can accomplish when you let go, or at least minimize, your time with draining, negative, incompatible, not-going-anywhere relationships/friendships!
  
  Observe the relationships around you. Pay attention. Which ones lift and which ones lean? Which one encourages and which ones discourage? Which ones are on a path of growth uphill and which ones are going downhill? When you leave certain people, do you feel better or feel worse? Which ones always have drama or don't really understand, know or appreciate you?
  
  The more you seek quality, respect, growth, peace of mind, love and truth around you, the easier it will become for you to decide who gets to sit in the FRONT ROW and who should be moved to the balcony of your life. You cannot change the people around you....but you can change the people you are around!
  
  --Author Unknown
• 

  Crumpet

  You guys aren't making this easy, lol.

  Crumpet, and you know you have a right to say as you please. That was one of those things that as JW's we don't have the right to do.

  I just think that sometimes we are all moving in different directions and sometimes we get to a point where what once was not as much of an issue becomes a bigger issue. I hope that in time I can find even more peace so that I can find an inner balance that doesn't need to be guided by either or. I.e. either I'm posting or not. Right now, I don't have that. And that is all me baby. I know that. I miss you Crumpy. You are such a sweety.

  Thanks hon - I will miss seeing around so often as you have been here the whole time I have and xare one of my favourites, but I do totally understand. I am thinking that through time constraints and other goals I need to focus on I shall need to take a step or two back from all things exJW for a while. Unlike you I can't read and not post though - I always have to stick my oar in don't I!
• 

  Good Girl or Bad Girl?

  Black Swan, your profile message was WONDERFUL, but I checked your profile and see you took it out. There have been many good responses to this thread as well. (By the way it's nice to see you!) I personally have trouble keeping up with this board if I don't spend a great deal of time here. So what holds me back is the amount of time necessary to really benefit from the board holds me back from personal growth in "real life." But if I only check it once or twice a day I feel out of the loop, so to say.

  Anyway, I can see both sides of the issue. You can either grow or be held back through using this board. It depends, I would guess, on the personality of the individual, the place in their life they are at, and what they are trying to get from posting here.

  No matter what, Black Swan, I wish you happiness. I am always glad to see you post here. But I understand if you feel like it isn't good for you.