Make up your very own "Scripture" and post it here (page 4)

minimus

Minimus 5:3, "At that time an eclipse occured over the land and darkness fell upon the excrement of the earth and all the able bodied women came to do obesiance to Minimus, their Lord., and Minimus liked it a lot."

RisingEagle

Ecliptical 10:4
And all the earthlings shall know, that you alone, who's name is ~~Eclipse~~ I-Don't-Have-A-Name

"Zealous early Ecliptians thought the name too holy to be spoken by the common worshipper and hid the correct pronounciation by only translating the Name without vowels: thus we have 'ECLPS.' Some translators erroneously added letters in an attempt to return to the 'true' theology rendering the Name 'Eucalypts.' This led to a terrible schism in the faith with many leaving to worship in Australia setting up colonies and adopting the belief known as 'Koalaism.' Recent finds in archeological digs have led modern scholars to question the practice of adding such letters and led to a belief that the Name should be translated I-D-H-A-N (pronounced I-Do-HA-Nay) meaning Divine One...."

eclipse

L M A O that was so funny, thank you guys, I feel so loved.

minimus

Minimus 5: 4-8, "Then the women bared themselves and prostated themselves to their Lord Minimus and they begged him for his goodness. But the Lord Minimus railed in his burning anger toward them and spanked each able bodied woman for their offenses. And the women cried in pleasure for the spankings that their Lord gave them and they became dominated just as was foretold by the prophets long ago."

ohiocowboy

1 Beelzebub 6:69 "And the Lord sayeth-"If there at a time sprouts an organization that prophesyeth in my name, uttering falsehoods and dividing families, let that one be wrought with the curse of many pedophiles amongst them, and make them empty of wallet, and devoid of magnificent properties in the land flowing with printing presses, through many court settlements, being accountable for the recompense of their error and harmful ways".

minimus

Minimus 5:9-11, "In that day the foreign women came to see why all the women of the land were so excited. And they found the large sheath that was used by the Lord Minimus and they instantly understood. Then they begged the womenfolk to let them come but the women of the land said 'no way'. And Minimus felt very gratified and his bosom shook with delight".

eclipse

Lunar Tides 7:11

''At twilight, she rose to find a great temptest in the west, and apon stepping nearer the godess found the prophetesses bowing down, and performing (deleted) acts before a disgusting thing. In a great and jealous rage she annhiliated the disgusting thing before her, and all the prophtesses weeped for their idol had been destroyed.''

minimus

Lunar Tides 7:12,"When Minimus caught sight of that disgusting thing that causes desolation, he swooned upon the virgins and prophetesses and restored that which looked broken. He raised it up until the young virgins let out a cry and then he was finished."

greendawn

Thou shalt not look down with contempt upon rechargeable batterries so as to increase pollution on the earth. One of them is worth hundreds of disposable ones. Keep the earth clean and unpolluted that I may not strike you in my anger.

eclipse

Nothing like ''worshipus interruptus'' hmm, minimus

Make up your very own "Scripture" and post it here

Share this