Self-Esteem Shot To Pieces - No Friends (page 2)

LeslieV

First welcome to the board. Many of us here were also raised just like you. Leaving is a process...it took years of brainwashing for you to believe the JW religion, it takes time to wash your brain free of its influences.

Do you work? Have you tried to make friends there? I know for myself I am my own worst enemy. Being a JW all my life, I really feel like a square peg in a round world. I think we have been so indoctrinated with not having "bad association" that we give that vibe out to people, so they stay away from us. JMO

Take small steps at a time. Keep coming back!!!

Leslie

choosing life

One thing the jw world does to you is put a big wall around you. I followed their demands not to associate with "worldly" persons and after leaving, it is hard to shake that. And I was not raised a jw, came in after getting out of highschool. Many have suggested you find a way to meet people outside the jws and I agree. You also have to learn to lower that wall in your mind. Otherwise, you will always hold back from really getting to know someone. And you have to lose the guilt too.

I know that's all easier said than done. Best Wishes, choosing Life

Quandry

Wheelintheskykeepsonturning

Welcome to the forum. I think you have heard some good advice, and will find out alot more the longer you stay with us.

One thing stood out. You dropped out of high school. It's time to complete your education. You will get a tremendous boost in self-esteem. Also, college is nothing like high school, so there is not the same social pressure.

Yes, be yourself, start slow...do something for others.

And stick around here.

primitivegenius

But i have no friends in the world... so i really feel like i have no choice but to go back to meetings

my friend............. that is a mind control device they use so damn much its sick.

so many of us either are in your situation....... or were in your situation. the religion makes you either abandon your friends and family............... or they make you witness to them so much that they get tired of hearing it and quit comeing around you.

end result is still you being isolated and lovebombed so you wont realize whats happening. you have so many "true friends" in the org. so you get those invitations and all that crap............. then you get bapt............ guess what? THEN your not good enough for them.......... why? cause you got a 2 door car....... or you dont put the national average of feild circus time in. or you dont have the perfect haircut or perfect black suit.......... the list is endless.

fact is buddy............. you made friends in school............... you were in the COOL group if only for a while. that means your likeable and people when they get to know you value your company. so meet people at work, befriend them.

find things you like to do locally.............. bike, hike, play video games........... whatever. go do those things and cut up with the people there............. and since they are there doing something that you like............. you have something in common. that will get you friends... choose them wisely and then forget about that brainwashing cult.

live your life the way you want to, for your happyness and screw those old dried up bastards. they are like joy and fun vampires............. they suck it out of you and always will.

you can even get friends here, attend some of the fests.......... we know how socially retarded we are when we leave that cult. so if your shy just being there you can get a kick out of the weird bastards who left with you.

you will see the crazy ones humping chairs in the middle of the dancefloor, and generally beeing fools.................... HAPPY FOOLS.............. so even if your still in the shy stage not knowing what you want to do............. at least you will get that laugh and break the ice.

when you realize finally that those old F*****s in brooklyn dont control you anymore............... then thats when you truly start to enjoy life.

so with all that crap......... i bid you welcome to JWD and enjoy your stay among your kindred

changeling

Welcome! Thank you for posting your story.

I was raised a witness and raised my kids as witnesses, so I know first hand how you feel.

Remember though, not getting involved in sex and other things at a young age is not a bad thing. Many kids get in way over their heads when they don't have the emotional maturity to deal with the situation. Be glad you were not one of those.

You are still a young man, the world is your oyster. Have you considerd going back and finishing high school and then going to college? I can assure you that if you do, you will never regret it.

Don't look back. Make the best of every day. Read, learn, improve yourself.

All the best,

changeling

BFD

i had no choice - from when i was a little kid

You're not a little kid anymore and now you do have choices.

Welcome to the forum, stick around you'll get lots more good advice like what changeling just said now.

BFD

Mincan

You have a private message friend, check your mail.

horrible life

I agree with Quandry:

One thing stood out. You dropped out of high school. It's time to complete your education. You will get a tremendous boost in self-esteem. Also, college is nothing like high school, so there is not the same social pressure.

And, I will add, that I do not feel that what you say about friends is all the way true. My daughter is only 16, and she knows that the friends she has in high school, only a couple will (MAYBE) in her circle, as she goes off to college. If you haven't, get you GED. You sound like you are very intelligent. Use it. There is money for the asking, if you go to school.

Shake off your past high school crap, and go off to school, and make new, grown-up friends. Ever seen guys, that live in the past, drink every night, or every weekend. OH what FUN! They don't have a pot to Pi$$ in.

You have made the first step, in not participating in selling magazines for a publishing company. Now get your GED, research the JW religion, and get a higher education, that the JW's screwed you out of.

Usually people go out with the friends they made at high school for years after high school... and end up making more friends etc. But i have no friends to go out with?

Mincan

Jesus some of you walk on eggs and carry a huge ass stick

B_Deserter

Wheel,
Our experiences are very similar. One of the symptoms of being in a cult is to have an intense need for approval from everyone. For me, I tried so hard to be liked that it often backfired. I have no friends outside, either. Of course, since I'm fading, it gives me time to figure out how to build friendships in the normal way without having to lose the friendship of everyone I've never known. Of course, that's not an option for you, but do NOT let this temporary setback cause you to compartmentalize the facts about the JWs and start thinking about going back. It will only make it worse for you in the end.

Self-Esteem Shot To Pieces - No Friends

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