Me thinks lovelylissa ia a duck :)
shunned
by lovelylissa 47 Replies latest jw friends
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ButtLight
That is one rule that use to erk me all the time. Bad association is just that! It shouldnt matter what title they throw over your head! If someone was never baptized, and lives an immoral lifestlye, should you still associate with that person? They do!
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OnTheWayOut
Me thinks lovelylissa ia a duck :)
Don't be so quick. There are many JW's who didn't live as JW's and a
goon squad (judicial committee) just never bothered to go after them.She was going to meetings, her "sin" came to light and they DF'ed her.
His situation was different at the time.
He still doesn't live as a JW. His family allows themselves to associate
with a known "sinner" as long as a congregation didn't DF him, but she
doesn't qualify.His family are dedicated to the organization and it's rules. They are
prisoners of stupid rules. This is common.Slow down Rosalee.
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Uzzah
Wow what a surprise, Rosalee is being judgemental.
To lovelylissa: I would insist your husband support you. The situation as you describe it is not fair.
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lovelylissa
no, i haven't been to meetings for years so it's strange that they still react so strongly to me! my hubby's not been part of it all for about 10 years, hes not part of it in any way now, but he is still treated like a human being.it is a shame that his parents (who i used to get on well with) don't see their own grandchildren much any more as it was me that used to make the effort. their cutting off their nose to spite their face. what's a duck? lissa
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momzcrazy
Lovelylissa,
I would explain to your husband how this is making you feel, in a gentle way without being mean about his family. If you get angry or yell his defenses will go up. He should support you and as it's his family, he should talk to them. They are being JW's and you really shouldn't expect different because you have the scarlet DF on your shirt and he doesn't. That is all they see.
I understand you have left JWs for good. Hopefully he will join you and you can develop other friendships together, so it won't matter so much what his family does.
Good Luck and Welcome to JWD.
momzcrazy
PS: MOST of the people here are wonderful and supportive, so don't get scared off by some who have attitudes.
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SnakesInTheTower
Welcome lissa...
Rosalee...WHY? GTFA. That's all.
Snakes ()
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Paralipomenon
Shunning is such a big deal to witnesses. It shows they are a team player and gets alot of sympathy from other witnesses. Since it involves inaction rather than action, it's much easier to do than, say, pioneer.
It never ceases to amaze me of witnesses that may gamble, swear, drink, cheat on taxes or watch inappropriate movies/TV will turn around and shun a family member as bad association and hold themselves as an example of a moral high ground. -
Rosalee
Tsk Tsk ....Sankes ... you sound like you are going to blow a gasket ;)
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lovelylissa
rosalee, i was repentant at the time, and as it happens he was not but as he haden't been to meetings for so long no one cared. If you are still df'd, why would you expect anything different?- i know i have only myself to blame for being df'd (even tho i didn't cheat on my hubby i started dating before my divorce came thro ) and we are not being treated in the same way.I still feel crap about beeing shunned and As i have no one else to talk to who knows how it feels i thought this might be the place.i wasn't expecting to be attacked I'v got enough to deal with without you starting on me aswell.