by changeling 49 Replies latest jw friends
Especially if they are the militant, bitter type...Are they wanting you to undergo the hardships they've been through?
Are they secretly jealous of those who have faded and have kept their family together?
Does misery want company?
Not saying this IS the case...just wondering...Is it possible?
changeling
I think some people become so obsessed with the Watchtower that they lose sight of why they're fighting against it, perhaps it can become more about revenge than about helping people. These seem to be the ones who demand people DA imo, but then, I don't like to generalise.
Personally speaking, no, I don't believe this to be the case. What I am observing in the jwd is a sense of those already df or da, have themselves been through all the crap leading up to their current situation. Thus, I believe that they themselves just don't want others to have to delay the enevitable consequence of whatever indescretion they have commited in their lives. Be it whatever. A choice of conciense, don't believe any longer, commited immorality and just waiting to be caught up with. The list goes on, but the final choice is up to each individual as to what they are going to do with thier miserable life staying in the borg. My choice? FAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAADING!
Sorry Changeling, but I strongly object to your suggestion.
I think it must be agony for those who are still trapped in there, with family obligations etc.
For a few of us; we were also trapped with family obligations for a number of years, finally resulting in us making a minal exit and lsoing our families anyway; depsite our best efforts.
How dare you compare me to some kind of manipulating freeloarder on this site to make any other fading dubs life even harder.
I can only tell what I went trhough and offer advise, adn even then thats all it iever is advise.
Much love to my fellow faders/ exdubs/ HUMAN BEINGS IN CRISIS DUE TO THIS AWFULL RELIGION.
WE ALL HAVE A RIGHT TO BE HAPPY AND TO BE TRUE TO OURSLEVES.
Shell69
It's kind of like a polaroid picture. After time when you look at it you realize that it is fading. There's nothing you can do to restore it or bring it nack to its full color. So, eventually you just just throw it away. Out of sight, out of mind. That's how I wish to be.
How dare you compare me to some kind of manipulating freeloarder on this site to make any other fading dubs life even harder
I really dont think this was a personal attack, and I for one can see where it came from. only today a fader posted about a possible elder visit and had the usual different opinions ranging from keep quiet, pretend you are depressed to go out with a bang and why should you try and lie just to keep people who dont love you anyway.
I can TOTALLY sympathise with Changeling. And strangely also with people who have either chosen to be disfellowshipped or had that choice made for them. i can see positives in both situations. However those that are fading are sometimes judged here to be weak, which isn't right.
Personally although I'm fading, I wouldn't judge someone for their own choice and i have much respect for those who have DAd especially, BUT on talking this weekend to others, I had a really good conversation when someone said that we must remember these JWs still in are under mind control, in this way we may see that by maintaining contact with them, it's possible that we can help some out, and even if not, WE are the better people.
I feel Changeling was asking a valid question, personally I dont think DFd ones are trying to get us to share their pain, I just think they are very sure it's the right decision so like any good friend will try and influence us to do the same thing, but like any good friend, they must respect our personal choice and the need to do what we feel is right at that time.
Maybe if/when I DA I will be on that side of the fence and realise how good and free it is and try and encourage others to jump too!
Poppy
shell69: I'm a fader!
Also, It was just a hypothesis,not and accusation.
I've seen a lot of people push faders to DA on this site and it made me wonder.
Personally, fading is best because of my grown children. But each one has to decide what is best for their circumstances, and no one should be made to feel bad because they chose not to DA.
changeling
I think some people become so obsessed with the Watchtower that they lose sight of why they're fighting against it, perhaps it can become more about revenge than about helping people. These seem to be the ones who demand people DA imo, but then, I don't like to generalise.
There are quite a few of those that would of been thrown out of any group much less the JW's on a charge of apostasy.
Poppy said:..."personally I dont think DFd ones are trying to get us to share their pain, I just think they are very sure it's the right decision so like any good friend will try and influence us to do the same thing"...
Look, here's the bottom line... it is an act of cowardice to not speak out... I know casue I didn't speak out for years-becasue i was being a coward... it cost you out the ass to stand up to these morons. But I also feel an obligation to others to do just that (speak out)... I probably wouldn't have said anything until my dad and mom died but I found that my 13 year old nephew was baptised. That shows you what a coward I have been... I just couldn't take it any longer
Challenging, I've been on this forum with you for a year now, what you said is bull... you think I want people to suffer? You're too good a person to say things like that. I don't believe you meant it like that...I have to believe you didn't mean to attack us that speak out like that casue I've read too many things you've said that were hhelpful.. maybe you're having a bad day. For those with famuily in, we have an obligation not to let them suffer, for those out, why are't you not speaking out? You really have nothing to lose. Either way, standing up is a good thing.
I remember when I first decided to speak out, couldn't live with myself anymore... there were those on this forum that railed against my efforts, and we had some pretty heated exchanges... I can tell you that doing nothing accomplishes just that.... nothing. So for those of you that do nothing... hows that working out for you? ALthought I can see why you don't want to, ther's never a good time to out yourself and lose the ones you love the most. It is still a necessity, what about others? DO you care? Not to mention, the internet is about to bring this house of cards crumbling down... the youth aren't buying this mess, and many are leaving...
But I kept looking at the evidence, and it's overwhelmingly against what the WT says, I thought about my own life and how it HAS FREAKING BEEN RUINED up to this point... man, I don't want others to go through that... and for what, so some dumb assed bastards can get wealthy, or so they can just have power? WHatever the reason they're doing what they do it isn't a good thing...
DId you guys see that guy with the messed up face? And you're saying nothing knowing all you know? And then say I want others to suffer? COme on folks, lets identify the real enemy here, it isn't me is it? I think not. I think the real truth is you that haven't spoken out feel bad you haven't done so, you know this stuff is bull and you feel you have no power and that makes you feel bad... I felt the same way... I love you all and take none of this personally, but I'm not the enemy here.... lets get that straight.
