Ready to out myself... (page 2)

Quentin

Tuff place to be...advice given is sound...hope the best for you and your kids.

edit to add: WELCOME!!!...

Different situation, but I am a fader. My wife is active, along with my mother. I totally
faded in a matter of less than 8 months. I was contemplating going slower, but every
reduction in activity went smoothly, so I kept going. I still have some problems with
how to deal with my JW's but I feel much freer now.

I didn't get your marital status, or how your spouse feels about all this. I understand
that you might have to go to some meetings, but keep trying to keep the numbers low,
and let your kids be kids if you must drag them to the hall. Be so weak that others
don't even consider that the kids should be answering at the WT lesson or signing up
for the TMS. Just my thoughts.

prophecor

He came out the closet!!! He came out the closet!!!

Welcome to dry land, Mickey

nomoreguilt

AND THE BEAT GOES ON....It appears as though there is a virtual flood of people from The Arc of Salvation these days.

Welcome to the board Friend. We won't abuse you here. be wise in all you say and do here.

I remain and have .........nomoreguilt

momzcrazy

Welcome MM, my son has your PJ's. We are big fans. Just wait until erynw gets back, she will be all over your name! Another big fan BTW.

I am very similar to you, except that this AM I mailed my DA letter. I faded, moved halls and then faded big time. I finally just quit in October. I have 3 kids. My husband left the borg 8 yrs ago, he's more perceptive than me. Both of our moms are active. His has not been too happy with my decision but she makes sure to tell us she still loves us. He has two sisters who left a long time ago. I have a brother who never got baptized, lucky brat. My sister was married to our hall's SO for 3 yrs. He died a year ago of cancer. She left in Oct like me, but neither of us knew the other was considering it. She came out as a lesbian and now lives with her GF. Our mom cut off all ties with us, even before we sent our letters. Our dad died 12 yrs ago. He was big time elder.

Now my kids. They are very happy. For most of their life I never forced anything except meetings. They had worldly friends. So when we finally quit there wasn't much of a change in their lives. My mom misses them I've heard. I don't prevent them from emailing or calling her. I just think they are mad at her for her reaction to me.

Everyone needs to work things out on their own. No one here will call you chicken for still going to keep family together.

I wish you luck on your path. May it stay relatively smooth.

In perfect love and perfect trust.

momzcrazy

drew sagan

Welcome to the board!

You will be able to learn alot from all of the differant folks on this board. Some have faded sucessfully, some haven't. Some have been Df'd, some has squeaked past judicial comittees. There is no set rule on how things go. Some peoples loved ones almost recognize that it isn't the truth instantly, others it takes years or never happens.

Take comfort in knowing that there are many who have gone through the same stuff.

LeslieV

First welcome to the board.

I am glad to hear that you are thinking of your kids. When I left the religion with my three daughters, I was traumatized that my family turned their backs on my girls. Now I am glad that they did. My daughters have not had that JW influence in their lives....They are now all educated, professional, and the most important quality, kind and compassionate young women. They also view the JW religion as a cult.

Good luck, make no decisons quickly...leaving is a process. One step at a time. Fade if it is possible. In my case it was not, and it probably was the most difficult time in my life when I left. You have to do what you are comfortable with. Have you talked to your wife about your doubts????

Keep coming back!
Leslie

LtCmd.Lore

Welcome to the forum your majesty.

changeling

Hey, fader here. Also have long time elder dad and deep family ties to the religion.

Just wanted to comment on your saying you can't see cutting ties while your parents are still alive. Mine are 84 and still ticking, I do believe they will outlive me, lol.

So, FYI, you CAN fade and remain in their good graces. It takes some time for them to adjust to the idea, but eventually it works itself out.

Personally, I could not put my life and my conscience on hold waiting for my parents to pass away.

Only you can decide what's right and workable for you, but I'm living proof that fading can be successful.

All the best to you,

changeling

nomoreguilt

Yes Mickey, fading is better than taking the BIG dive, been fading for 3 years but now I have the task ahead of me of exposing my son to Crisis of Conscience. Good luck and good health in whatever course you choose to take.

I remain and have ....nomoreguilt

Ready to out myself...

Quentin

OnTheWayOut

prophecor

nomoreguilt

momzcrazy

drew sagan

LeslieV

LtCmd.Lore

changeling

nomoreguilt

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