Sexual Harassment

reneeisorym

I've had something happen to me at work and I just need some opinions ...

I work at a store where I am the only female employee. We were short handed these past two weeks because someone quit and the new guy doesn't start until Monday so they got a guy from another store to come fill in. I hardly know this guy except for him talking to me about business related things.

So he came in this morning to my office because he needed a gas card to get gas for the truck. (He is a salesman/delivery driver)

The conversation went like this:

He said after we were done with the business, "Is that a picture of your man?"
I said, "Yes, we just got married this summer."
He said, "How are you two doing?"
I said, "Great. We're just newly weds enjoying life."
He said, "So you get along well and everything?"
I was worried where this was going but I said, "Oh yeah. I couldn't ask for better."
He said, "So do you ride each other a lot?"
I choked!! ... turned red and my jaw dropped.

He left without another word -- I thought about it and decided to tell our boss. He is going to talk to the president about it! And I think he's making an even bigger deal than I would have! Now I don't know that I want this big of a deal about it. I was just hoping he would tell the guy "You need to be careful what you say around ladies." ... Now there's a report being made -- I just don't know how to feel. Help ..

babygirl75

I feel for you!!!

I had a similiar experience happen to me, but the guy actually put his hands on me and bruised my arm. I brought it up to our boss, just to have that guy leave me alone! I didn't have any intention on getting him fired. We used to joke with each other and I think things then went to far and got out of hand. Before I knew it, I was involved in meetings with HR and they ended up firing him! He also came by the office looking for me and they said he was pissed and had to be escorted off the property. Glad I was off that day! Never saw him again after that!

Open mind

Based on how you've described this situation, this guy was WAY out of line. He needs a corporate headslap, IMO.

Good for you for reporting him.

I just hope you don't get caught in any vindictive backlash from him.

OM

worldtraveller

Odd question to ask someone you know nothing of. Years ago I "rode" on many, but it meant at the time-pestering( like as in ragging on someone). However it seems to have a different meaning now. Hope it was just "ragging".

Nowadays I speak on personal terms (only) to people I have known for a long time. All others I keep the jokes and frank talk to a minimum or none at all. Keeps me out of trouble.

If he loses his job, it is his problem, especially if he is given a chance to correct the problem, but doesn't.

Abandoned

One comment would be hard to prosecute as sexual harassment, although I agree that was completely out of line. You probably could get him in trouble if you wanted to, but it might be a good idea to just let him know that you were offended and would appreciate him not make those kinds of comments in the future. Document that and be ready to move on to the next level if he doesn't honor your request.

You could go right to the boss too and since he's from another location, you might be able to cause him a bit of trouble. I guess you need to weight whether the guy is really trying to harass or if he's just a bit of a moron.

edit: Oh, you already made the report. Well, trust your instincts and your decision. He was out of line. Good for you for having the guts.

eclipse

Renee,

this guy is a pig. His sole purpose for being there was to ask you something dirty.

He saw the picture and knew that he was going to lead you with questions until he got to his goal question:

He said, "So do you ride each other a lot?"

He knew exactly what he was doing, and he should be reported and have what he did on his record.

He deserves to get whatever punishment is coming to him,

Him getting told, ''watch what you say to the ladies'' is not good enough.

I'm sorry that you're going through this.

Be strong and don't back down when it comes time to make a statement if it comes to that.

~~MenP~~igs like him should not get away with that kind of sh*t.

Take care.

free2think

Im sorry this happened to you Renee but good for you for reporting it.

You never know, if this guy isnt stopped now who knows how far he will go in the future before he is.

mentalclearness

I can see how it would be awkward for you, but at least you don´t have to work with him all the time...I can´t believe how disrespectful some men are sometimes...makes you think what barn they grew up in???

Finally-Free

The guy is way out of line and ought to get his ass fired out the door.

Over time I've learned not to volunteer information to people on the job. I'm not interested in mixing my personal life with my work life anyway. It's nice to be civil and friendly, but some people (like this asshole) will use it as an opening to harass others. I've had women ask me personal questions at work, and I'll usually respond with something like, "Yes", "No", or "Why do you ask?" That, along with an uninviting facial expression, is usually enough to discourage further probing.

W

Country Girl

In any kind of non-consenting-partner capacity, comments such as this should not be tolerated. There is a work world, and it's important that boundaries be maintained so that business as usual can go on. This was threatening and intimidating to you because it was unwanted. Please report this to your manager, and let the cards fall where they may. The more times that indivuduals report this type of lewd and unwanted behavior, the more it will be disciplined and unsupported.

CG

Sexual Harassment

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