Thinking of becoming a Witness again and my reasons for doing so :(

by reniaa 383 Replies latest jw experiences

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  slimboyfat

  Sorry, what I meant to say was: but do the Witnesses have the "truth"?

  And isn't that a more important consideration than the other things you mentioned?
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  AlyMC

  I am going to agree with Avishai here.

  Someone close to me was out for over 10 years. I talked to her the whole time she was out. She went through 3 really awful husbands. She never got out of her dead end job. She never sought and found true friendships.

  She went back. Now she says she is happy. She goes to her conventions with her "friends". She puts a smile on her face. She's in another bad relationship, but makes excuses for him. She is still as lonely and sad as she ever was... only she is now putting a mask of "joy in serving Jehovah" on. She's not really changed much in herself, she's only enabled herself to pretend it is all better. She uses her experiences while out to be a success story while back in.

  I've known her a long time... and what was hurting and broken inside of her is more than a religion or a husband can fix. All she is doing is fooling herself because she didn't know how to actually make her life better.

  I do not know you, so I couldn't begin to say that I know what you need. But what you shared with me reminded me of her. Before deciding to return, I'd honestly consider therapy and introspection. The change you want in your life, will likely have to come from within. It won't come from an organization, a husband, or any external sources.
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  chikikie

  I have four sisters and two brothers, and I think the way we have suffered in the JWs is that we were never accepted or i suspect liked. A classic example is that, I an unmarried mum, got baptised when my baby was 11months old, and when she was 4, I was aux pioneering, there are three cong that share the same hall, and a reg pioneer couple from my cong decided to hold a fun picnic day for all the witness children...... Me and my daughter was the only ones not to recieve an invite, We never recieved invites to anything, so thsat coupled with some elders wives trying to marry me off to a 64 year elder (me being 23/24 at the time) I knew I had to get away, infact I moved 300 miles away. I havent found much happiness in the world BUT at least I can CHOSE who Im friendly with and I dont feel forced to be nicey nicey.
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  reniaa

  I left the truth myself 10 years ago and cut all ties myself, my friends from truth tried to keep in touch but I was determined to make it a clean break and not stumble them, I recognise now I was very depressed at the time from my failed marriage to my first hubby the alcoholic,

  I got everything I thought I wanted away from the truth but the price i've paid for it has been great as you can see from my firsat post.

  The most disolutioning thing was how other christian faiths not as strict as JW's will forgive anything and just say try not to do it next time, my boyfriend says he may discuss it in his cell-group so he can repent properly but he still has abandoned me :(
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  claytoncapeletti

  You can not do the same thing as before and expect a different result. I wish you all the best, but running back to the Watchtower will not solve your problems. Becoming a JW again is only a short term solution. Do some personal work first! Focus on what's best for you and your kids. You don't need organized religion to make you whole, that power only lies within you.

  You will probably be welcomed back into the hall and be love bombed all over again. We all know that it will not last forever, sooner or later, the same issues that drove you away will resurface. Then you will have to go through the painful fade or even be DF.

  Agian, I wish you the best.
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  R.Crusoe

  I even think that if you went back you would soon start to see the futility of sitting hours a week and your child following that through as simply a charade to substitute for the life you cant find alone in the world!

  I actually believe many JWs are in it and know full well they are there simply for the friendships and the godspeak is a necessary evil!

  Now that is funny but I gamble I'm spot on for more people than you'd imagine!
• 

  reniaa

  I do appreciate your replies guys, I'm sorry for your experiences chiki, I do think witnesses forget age in the religion, they should never have set you up with a 64 year old :(

  I do think women out-number men in JW's and that has always been a problem for finding a partner.

  I do recognise going back may not solve all my problems certainly i've given up on ever finding a partner now, in or out of the JW;s but it would be nice to find friendship and people that I can relate too.
• 

  Finally-Free

  My reasons for never going back to the JWs:

  1. They teach lies and shun you if you stop believing. When they change their beliefs, you have the choice of following the "new light" or being shunned.
  2. They protect people who rape children.
  3. They persecute their own members for the heinous act of getting a post secondary education.
  4. Their "love" and "friendship" is conditional on your keeping your beliefs in step with the publishing corporation.
  5. They are the most slanderous, thieving, backbiting pieces of shit I've ever had the displeasure of knowing. They make my former, pre-jw, "worldly" friends, who were outlaw bikers, prostitutes, and drug addicts, look like angels.

  I'd sooner burn out my own eyes than go back to the JWs.

  W
• 

  Jim_TX

  I don't have any advice or words of wisdom - other than to say that I am having issues with the terms 'worldly' and 'the truth'.

  I am no longer a JW - but do not consider myself 'worldly' - nor do I consider others not JWs to be 'worldly'. I consider them to be people - plain and simple.

  Yes - there are bad people - and there are good people - some people belong to a religion called Jehovah's Witnesses - but most do not.

  Most of all - ones' personal approach to life will affect ones' outcome. If one approaches it with a 'negative' attitude - most likely - one will have negative experiences. If one approaches it with a 'positive' attitude - most likely - one will have positive experiences. Also - negativity mainly attracts negative people - positivity attracts positive people. Not sure this bit makes sense... but it has worked for me.

  Ok - so I lied. I gave advice - when I said I had none.

  Good Luck,

  Jim TX
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  chikikie

  The question is, will you get rewarded with true friendships if you indeed go back...... or will you find that like I did, no matter how much you do, it is never good enough, and you are still shunned? Remember I was aux pioneering and goign to all the meetings and even i didnt get invited to anything. My only true friends were the elderly sisters (over 70) they often asked why i didnt seem to have any associates my own age.....