I've been reading some of the weightier theology books I have access to at work (BOOKSTORE:Religion:Theology section) and notice my complaints are actually a brance of already-existing theology. Truly, there is nothing new under the sun.
Calvinism, Presbyteriansim and such want God to have planned everybody's election from the start. They justify the "seeming" injustice of the playing favorites as under the heading of God's Soverignty.
All this means (God's Soverignty) is that He is bigger, stronger and more powerful--so, He can do whatever He sees fit.
This isn't a bully, of course. Why? He's "god". A fragile distinction, if you ask me.
God's love, as it turns out, is whatever you want to see it as being and their is no basis for it other than the fact God plays his cards deuces wild. God can pull wild cards out of thin air and the rest of us must play the hand we are dealt.
Lovely. Just lovely.