Please, I need helpful suggestions.....

by New light for you 48 Replies latest jw friends

  • jwblog
    jwblog
    Nobody should be pressured into making decisions with so much on the line.

    This is how you know the Watchtower is not a healthy religion, and cannot be the truth

    If it really is the truth, why does there have to be so much pressure for people to conform?

    People don't "go crazy" when the leave the Jehovah's Witnesses. Rather people go through tons of stress that the religion imposes on them when they leave. Kind of like hitting somebody over the head with a baseball bat and then telling him he should have ducked.

    The important thing to remember is that you should be making the decisions where your life is headed, and nobody should be using high pressure tactics to force you into any other decision. Remain calm. I personally wouldn't be talking with JWs at this point, just will create trouble for you. Be as generic and non-specific as possible when talking to the JWs. You don't have to prove anything to them, worry about your own well being.

    Well scripted :smile:

    Truth does not change from one day to the next, Truth will always remain to be true. They should state that they are "seekers" of truth and understanding, and should admit to when their understanding is incorrect. No person upon the earth can claim complete truth and understanding, not even the faithful and discreet slave. It is written that we will recieve partially until that which is complete arrives. Those in the heavens are created as "first fruits" therefore all truth will be revealed to them first. Jesus Christ is the faithful and true witness. All truths are proven to him during judgment. After Jesus arrives, the "TRUTH" will be revealed to those upon the earth when the new scrolls are opened. It brings much heartache when those that you chose to befriend shun you because of the way they were taught to believe. Find friendship with those that believe in like manner if need be. If there are those from the organization that choose to display their love and affection to you, then accept them willingly. You have gained a "true" brother or sister. One who is called a brother or sister will not judge you according to the teachings of Jesus Christ. But again, do not pass judgment upon them either. The true meaning of an apostate is one whom tries to cause divisions unworthily, meaning that the words they put forth are meant to decieve and the words they put forth have no truth to them. Once an untruth is revealed and proven to be false. it should be brought to the attention of those that are teaching it. This is not an apostate, one whom conforms to what is proven to be true. These that stand by truth are found praiseworthy by The Heavenly Father. the faithful slave
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  • Alwayshere
    Alwayshere
    I'm the co-ordinater of fun stuffetc.at the hall, friends with every one and play and watch everyones kids.

    Sounds like my daughter, My fault for raising her in the cult. But like so many others, thought it was the truth. But when my Son left the organization, I wanted him back in, so done research like you did and found out what the real truth is and got out. Had many friends [I thought]. But none will speak to me and my daughter said "We don't have a relationship anymore." Be glad you left while your kids are still young and you won't lose them. Your family is more important than an Apostate religion.

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  • jwblog
    jwblog
    Sounds like my daughter, My fault for raising her in the cult. But like so many others, thought it was the truth. But when my Son left the organization, I wanted him back in, so done research like you did and found out what the real truth is and got out. Had many friends [I thought]. But none will speak to me and my daughter said "We don't have a relationship anymore." Be glad you left while your kids are still young and you won't lose them. Your family is more important than an Apostate religion.
    If you claim to carry the truth and teach it, you better be prepared to prove it. This was my way of thinking and like you, I did research. What caught my eye was the time period when they were taken into custody by the authorities (the members of the w.t.s.) It did not conform to the time period when they claimed that the wild beast (united nations) came to be. The United Nations came into being after them being taken into custody. In the end times the wild beast make wars against the "holy ones", so whom are they claiming to be if not the holy ones correct? So I could not in good conscience teach others that it was the truth according to their claims.
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  • New light for you
    New light for you

    Thank you SO much for all your great understanding and suggestions.

    So I got a call from a "Friend" tonight, supposed to watch her child Monday for the last time... she gave me this VERY WEIRD couple sentences about how she doesn't need me and thank you and bye... hung up. SOOOOOOOOO unlike her... very obvious she heard something about me, this is a "friend" and we'd be able to talk on the phone for a while about whatever normally. I didn't go to meeting today (it's been like 3 weeks now since a meeting, since my vacation, sick week, and now just scared refusal). I wish I had a friend that i could say, "ok, what's up? what are they saying about me? im not even in an elder meeting and they're treating me like i'm DFed????" BUT all my friends are too scared of me now ..... BOO!! do i scare you?

    I'm leaning toward pushing this all forward. I'd still prefer to fade, but this org. is crap. this is all rediculous. I was prepared to be scared of and ignored if i was DFed , but before i even have a meeting with elders???? that's record time! who needs this ???? I'm so many different emotions at once.... and going to just combust... maybe it's better to just not go back, and put off the elder meeting indefinately.. if they'd let me. What fake freakin frends. bitches. there. i said it.

    Thank you so much, I have wanted to respond to all the great postings, and i have to re-read everything to get all the info out because my brain isn't up to par right now... good thing i didn't go to college!!!!

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  • Robert7
    Robert7

    Thanks all for helping both of us.

    It just angers me that the hint of not believing the Society makes everyone DROP you like that. Honestly it actually makes leaving easier as it shows the Society and the people for what they really are.

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  • Quentin
    Quentin

    Lots of sound advice and comments have been made....hopefully they will help...

    New light (love that) do everything within your power and with every fiber of your being to remain calm, meek and mild mannered....

    The elders, and any "former" friends, will do everything they can to cause you to explode and go bat s____ on them , especialy the elders. That's how high control groups work. It will be difficult, don't give them that power.

    You have each other. Your kids are young enough to meet and make friends that will accept them for who they are, not what they should be because of some publishing/sales companies rules... In fact, you and Robert have the same opportunity as well....Best to you and yours...

    Quentin (of the been thrown under the bus, got up dusted myself off, and walked on down the road class).......

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  • Honesty
    Honesty

    Welcome, NewLight.

    I've been officially OUT for almost 4 years.

    I faded for almost 5 years before I was finally pushed into a corner by the ones I trusted most, family.

    Thank God that you have your spouse and you can raise your children in a guilt-free environment.

    I can only imagine how my childhood would have been if my parents had not joined a JW splinter group when I was 6 years old.

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  • bluesbreaker59
    bluesbreaker59

    IF YOU HAVE FAMILY IN THE BORG:

    Don't meet with the elders; claim illness, out of town for vacation, stress at work, etc.

    OR

    IF YOU DON'T HAVE FAMILY:

    Go out in a blaze of glory, both apostate "guns" firing (guns as in BRAINS, not weapons)

    OR

    The best ever is just to not recognize them as having any authority over you, they aren't your parents, they aren't "appointed by holy spirit", you don't owe them ANYTHING!

    I'm sorry for your situation, but you are leaving with your husband, which is great, and you have each other to lean on. I left 85% of my friends, and all of my father's side of the family behind, and I had no mate to lean on.

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  • harmonycat
    harmonycat

    Welcome New Light for You: You have a PM.

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  • Quandry
    Quandry

    So I got a call from a "Friend" tonight, supposed to watch her child Monday for the last time... she gave me this VERY WEIRD couple sentences about how she doesn't need me and thank you and bye... hung up.

    This is the UP side of leaving the JWs.

    I used to have people wanting me to watch their kids. Even had two girls for several days while mom had baby #3. Bathed her girls, fed them, put some of my child's clothes on them for meeting, etc.

    Had one woman that had her daughters call me to take them to school, and other places when her work schedule conflicted.

    Lent my car out when someone had a need.

    Took people to Dr. appointments, etc.

    Now you will have more time, and use less gas. Yes, "they don't need you anymore." RIGHT......

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