Dating a JW and need some help

by Whizkid 32 Replies latest social relationships

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  WTWizard

  I am assuming that this potential date is at least somewhat open to discussion. The first thing I would do is hunt for those washtowel articles that contradict other washtowels. You will have plenty to pick from, and that could include issues about oral sex, organ transplants, and 1975. Getting close-dated articles around 1975 is a good idea--if you can find an article urging people to sell out with a late 1974 or early 1975 date, and a "blame the victim" article around 1976 or 1977, all the better.

  Beyond that, you will have to use your Bible. Whether you believe in it or not, remember the witlesses claim to go by the whole Bible and even use the scripture about all scripture is inspired to back that up. You could start with Ephesians 2:8 and 9, telling us that salvation is by grace and not works. Luke 2:10-14 is another good place: That discusses the first Christmas party in heaven, among perfect angels. 1Thess 4:11 is another prime scripture--mention that it tells people to mind their own businesses. At which point, bring up that the "friends" are urged to be loyal to the Washtowel Slaveholdery and rat out people for doing things that are really none of their business. The goal here is not to get her into a new religion but to show her that the Washtowel, while claiming to use the whole Bible, does not.

  Prepare for interference from the hounders. Even if she is open, the hounders are going to do all they can to bust this up. Their prime tools include "shepherding" calls to blow you off, talks about worldly associates, and setting her up with so many assignments in field circus (which could include calls) designed to prevent her from seeing you. They may even approach you, telling you to leave her alone unless you are willing to join the cancer (in which case, you would have to study with another man, wait an indefinite period of time before courting, and watch her get taken out from under your feet). The ultimate goal is to get her to disassociate or to become totally inactive, at which point the hounders will not be able to do anything.

  Now, if she is totally unreceptive, you would be fighting a losing battle. From the opening, that doesn't look like the case here.
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  Whizkid

  Wish me luck, tomorrow is the day..
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  megs

  Good luck to you, I hope and pray it works in your favour!!
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  curlymoses

  "High Stakes" is exactly right! At stake is the relationship between you and this girl. MOST important are your feelings for each other, yes? You must act accordingly. El corazon = the heart. Deep in your heart you will find direction, be patient and ready. After understanding your feelings for one another - Focus on common ground. You said you have similar interests - pursue them. Be open minded, trust your instincts and your conscience. La Verdad = the truth. If you are interested in learning the truth of things, tell her that AND give some examples. Use clear and consistent examples from any topic(not necessarily religion based)in order to demonstrate your degree of effort, detail, time, success, or failure in pursuing La verdad de las cosas, or the truth of things. And I urge you and others to persistently seek la verdad pura y simple (the pure and simple truth). How can you lose?
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  Prov1320

  Whizkid,

  I wish I had seen this post earlier to give you my opinion.

  I have had extensive discussions with others about why the governing body is not who they say they are. In every instance I have found that you need to use cunning techniques. It's not devious, but it's the ONLY WAY to get beyond their thinking block.

  Questions are very good. Asking about key doctrines and providing key questions can throw a JW for a big loop. I recently tried questioning 607 to a brother and he was scared to death that he couldn't find the answers. He told me after that he couldn't sleep that night and wanted to hear more in secret. Good for him!

  This takes time, and unless you have done a TON of research, i'm afraid there's not much you can do. You MUST be prepared when facing a JW. And you must buy time. Ask her to give you time to do YOUR research, as you need to convince yourself first. That way you can leave discussions open. Also, get the Crisis of Conscience book in spanish, fourth edition. You can download it as a PDF (I think) or buy it online.

  Hope this helps.
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  Eyes Open

  The fact that she isn't baptised is very good. This means that if she were to want to stop being seen as a JW, she could fade out and stop attending and then tell family that she's with you later without being shunned.
  
  JW's only normally shun relatives if they have already been baptised and then get disfellowshipped of disassociate. So this is why she gets together with other relatives of a different religion.
  
  Apparently today is the day, but leave things open and take your time. Post back soon.
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  Whizkid

  Alright, I'm back.
  
  It wasn't very successful. There was a 'major' language barrier between us yesterday that didn't help at all. I knew what I wanted to say, I just didn't know how to say what I wanted in Spanish. I wish she knew more English or I knew more Spanish. But she says she's going to have a friend (who's not a JW) to help translate between us so we can figure it all out.'
  
  I guess I'll have more time to do some research because of this, too. Also, if anyone can suggest some Spanish websites/books, that'd be great! Thanks for the help.
• 

  Frequent_Fader_Miles

  We have a lot of similar interests and always have stuff to talk/do

  It wasn't very successful. There was a 'major' language barrier between us yesterday that didn't help at all. I knew what I wanted to say, I just didn't know how to say what I wanted in Spanish.

  How do you two manage to advance your relationship with such a major language barrier?
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  Whizkid

  How do you two manage to advance your relationship with such a major language barrier?

  
  It was more just because of all the specific words used in bible that she and I never use in normal conversations. We usually get along fine with no problems, other than here and there where we usually figure out what we're trying to say.
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  Frequent_Fader_Miles

  It was more just because of all the specific words used in bible that she and I never use in normal conversations. We usually get along fine with no problems, other than here and there where we usually figure out what we're trying to say.

  Oh, I see. Do you have a Spanish dictionary you could use, perhaps?