Those With JW Spouses - How are you Coping ? Any experiences ? (page 3)

flipper

HAL 9000- I hope you are able to get your wife to avoid the witnesses in time. It is good you will be there to support her when she decides to stop someday. Usually it takes something BIG to get them to stop. Like suffering an injustice from elders , or leaders in the cult ( like I did ), or she will just see the falsity of it all and won't be able to go to meetings anymore ! Whatever happens- I wish you the best, and good luck ! Peace out, Mr. Flipper

flipper

I noticed another poster getting advice for helping his witness wife get out of the witnesses - so I thought this might fit in with him getting some experiences or insight on this thread too from any who have experiences in coping with this situation of a witness mate ! Thanks, Peace out, Mr. Flipper

daniel-p

Things are going well... My wife goes about her JW activities like normal, but always makes our time together the priority. She's very loving and accommodating to my schedule and will try to work around it. In turn, I try to work around her meeting times and so forth. She just went to the DC a week ago and it was the first time I didn't go with her. However, we missed each other so much that next time I'll likely go too--but not to the convention. I'll find something else to do. We've been through the rocky points, but things are much better lately. I'm a lucky man, and even if she never leaves the JWs but remains as she is, I'll be happy.

flipper

DANIEL-P- I'm glad your witness wife is loving and accomodating to you ! That is good ! It sounds like she really values your marriage over the witness " cult " beliefs. I hope she keeps being authentic and nice to you ! Hang in there, Peace out, Mr. Flipper

Black Sheep

One thing that I do find very strange, is that my wife defends cults in general.

She defends the same cults that she knocks on doors warning about and it doesn't even register in her brain that she is doing it.

She is an 'apostate' of the Anglican church, but has cast a slur on the character of 'apostates' of Moonies and Mason's on the basis that disaffected members are only going to tell you about the dark side of their cults.

She also has a habit of reverting to Anglican doctrine when confronted with evidence the the WT is not what it claims to be.

I an convinced that, if she had not made the mistake of bringing up her children as JWs and making some converts herself, she would have a much easier time admitting that the cult I was born into is just that.

She has so much to lose by admitting that our family was/is under cult mind control that she is reluctant to bear the pain of that admission.

If I can't get her out she could have a negative effect on our grandchildren.

She knows how I feel about that.

Cheers
Chris

sacolton

I woke up this morning and the birthday bags were all ready to go. Nice and tidy. Wrappings and bows. Professionally done. My active JW wife did an amazing job! All I have to do is sign the card. Hee! Hee!

seeking help

Hey Y'all,

Nice topic, me UBM her active super-witness, i have been very supportive in the past, not so much now. I reached a point where I just couldn't do all the meetings and assemblies anymore. Once your eyes are opened you can't turn back. So I didn't go to the DC this year, that was a BIG deal. now its like I feel bad so I go to meetings, but I m so disconnected.. thats really the word for it. I would never really listen and could care less. Now I listen and care more. Does that make sence. I would love to have a normal life. I really want that, but i don't think its gonna happen. I feel that if i go with my wife that at least she gets some of my input on the nonsence being spewed from the platform. Like at sunday watchtower she was talking to me and drawing on the watchtower. now if im not there shes either really tuned in or maybe thinking about me not being there. We have 2 older kids 1 DFed and 1 in. Shes born in and the only one in her family thats still active. her folks have passed away and her siblings are not active or even interested. i wish she would catch on, she knows about the pedophile thing. she thinks its just random issues and that the news blows it up. also that apostates everywhere.. I found this site and am gratefull, but sometimes the reality of it is overwhelming. so I need to stay away for a bit. If I even bring up anything bad about the truth she shuts down. I wish I had the strength to say its either them or me, but Im afraid I know whos gonna win.

SH

burningbridges

Well me and my husband are divorcing and i had to get a rest order on him before so obviously not so hot. The order is gone now but were battling for custody and its war. Coping? I'm actually more sane and at peace than when I was in the hall, ironically, so that tells you how much pressure the hall puts on you....

burningbridges

flipper

BLACK SHEEP- I hear what you are saying. I think for a lot of us with relatives still in the witnesses - it would be too much pain for them to admit they were under cult mind control. They'd just wilt if they knew they had wated their lives on a lie ! With all your wife's religious background - it's no wonder she's confused. I tend to believe religion confuses people more ! I hope you can prevent any negative influence on your grandchildren. Take care.

SACOLTON- I'm amazed your JW wife will do Birthday's for people ! Hopefully she'll even do Christmas with you this year ! Why not ?

SEEKING HELP- I feel for you having this super fanatic witness wife . I had one of those years ago ! You would think that being born into it - since the rest of her family is not in and left the witnesses, that she would follow suit . But I guess not. I have a witness daughter 21 , who makes excuses for the pedophile crisis as well. Apostates , blah, blah, blah ! She shuts down too if I bring up anything negative about the witnesses. Hang in there bro ! Hopefully things will change in time .

BURNING BRIDGES - I am sorry you are having to get a restraining order to protect yourself - but glad you have the good sense to do that ! I agree at the kingdom hall we had much more pressure than real life ! I hope your custody battle goes in your favor ! I'll be thinking good thoughts for you ! Hang in there ! Peace out, Mr. Flipper

Those With JW Spouses - How are you Coping ? Any experiences ?

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