by passwordprotected 73 Replies latest jw experiences
Hi Mark,
Good for you!
I would highly suggest talking to Nils and Sherry Jansma over at www.watchtowerworld.org/gallery.htm if you get a chance first. They went through this very thing, and are both fine Christians now. But I think you should either both go or not at all. Just my opinion, if you gotta talk to them, do it as a united front.
God bless,
Randy
Dear Mark you are the head of your household and it is your 'right' to take your family to church after DAing......your wife is suppose to be humble in her subjection to your headship.
She will need to decide for herself to be DFd, DAd or claim the headship clause..... in front of the JC investigation, with or without you. (Remember you can claim headship rights after DAing to be entitled to be present during her meeting)
I and many other JW gals use the UBM headship clause....
Consider reading WTS article Feb 15, 2007 page 18 " Wives—DeeplyRespectYourHusbands"
The OM Book has some nice admonishments starting on page 8 and later in the question on page 129, The OD book pages 162 & 207. The Family Happiness Book of course is always good too quote for wives of UBMs. Even this years release has some gems in defense of women remaining faithful and submissive under husbandly headship.
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it-1p.1054Headship***As man had priority in human creation, he is given priority of position over the woman. (1Ti 2:12, 13) The woman was made from a rib taken from the man and was bone of his bones and flesh of his flesh. (Ge 2:22, 23) She was created for the sake of the man, not the man for her sake. (1Co 11:9) Therefore, the woman, in God’s arrangement for the family, was always to be in subjection to her husband and was not to usurp his authority. (Eph 5:22, 23; 1Pe 3:1) Also, in the Christian congregation the woman is not to teach other dedicated men nor to exercise authority over them.—1Ti 2:12.
(Titus2:3-5) . . .Likewise let the aged women be reverent in behavior, not slanderous, neither enslaved to a lot of wine, teachers of what is good; 4 that they may recall the young women to their senses to love their husbands, to love their children, 5 to be sound in mind, chaste, workers at home, good, subjecting themselves to their own husbands, so that the word of God may not be spoken of abusively.
(1
Peter3:1-2)3 In like manner, YOU wives, be in subjection to YOUR own husbands, in order that, if any are not obedient to the word, they may be won without a word through the conduct of [their] wives, 2 because of having been eyewitnesses of YOUR chaste conduct together with deep respect.
I can't get over all the paperwork that seems to be required. It's as though you have been under a subservial contract of sorts. But then, after what Leoleia said about Enoch and all the records being kept on us by these fallen angels, I suppose WT is answering to someone else.
(from Leoleia).....Enoch is the heavenly scribe (1 Enoch 8:1-2, 12:4, 14:24-15:1), who writes down the deeds of all generations into the heavenly books. These books are opened on Judgment Day so that everyone may be judged on account of what they did prior to the resurrection. Thus Jubilees (written in the middle of the second century BC) says that "Enoch's work was something created as a warning to the generations of the world, so that he should report all deeds of each generation on the day of judgment" (10:17; cf. 4:17-21). Similarly, in the Essene Dead Sea Scrolls, the Genesis Apocryphon states that Enoch "is beloved and since with the holy ones (i.e. the angels) is his lot apportioned and they inform him of everything" (2:20-21), that is, the deeds of those on the earth. ......... "And Enoch served faithfully before God and behold he was not with the inhabitants of the earth, for he had perished and ascended into heaven and he called his name Metratron, the great scribe" (Targum Pseudo-Jonathan, Gen. 5:24).
I hope it goes well.
Pleased to meet you Mark.
Take care,
Ismael
Mark, I admire your honesty and your integrity. Part of me wishes you'd just make it hard for them and everyone else by refusing to play by their rules but it sounds like you've made up your mind and you must do what's right for you and your family.
I would love to be a fly on the wall when you have your meeting with the elders - especially when you get to the bit where you tell them how their comments helped you to leave! Way to go. Let's hope your calm, reasonable, intelligent approach makes them think.
I hope Gail makes it too - just be prepared if she does that they'll probably want to interview her separately (I'd be inclined to refuse this star chamber style questioning).
Wishing you all the best.
Sam
How did it all go....getting out of the cult? And what the heck is up with all that? In the real world, if you want to leave a church you simply quit going and don't show up. There are no forms to fill out (that I know of anyway) and no one bugs the crap out of you to come back. They might call and see if you are ok or something like that, and if you simply say you've started going somewhere else, so be it. You need to go where you get fed the real Word, not some nuts' interpretation of their own bible that was written with the help of a medium. Check it out....research the background of each and every religion that you might want to become a member of. By the way, I never have been and never will be a JW but my dad got sucked into the cult by a tramp from the local hall who came calling in her tight pants after my mom passed away. Great religion, I'd say. Find a rich old, horny fool and send a scantily dressed sister out to console him. This all happened in the Elk City, Oklahoma congregation,in case you're wondering. Good luck to you and yours and may God bless you all.
Melody,
Tight pants?
Probably it was a tight leather skirt.
Pants? Never!!! She'd be swiped off the street and into the back room of the khall so fast...
Yes, tight pants. She was up on a ladder (showing her ass) while helping Brother Bobby paint the house after my mom died. Oh, and three days after my mom had passed, I went out there and was checking his caller ID to see who all had called to offer their condolences, and Sister Ann had called 23 (twenty-three) times on that day alone. She had called several more times on days one and two, but 23 times on day three! She sure didn't want Brother Bobby to be lonely, did she???
Mark, I'm proud of you. The elders will blow you off but you never know what seeds of doubt you might plant.
And I agree with Randy, you and your wife should go together and no allow them separate you. Do this as a couple. You're married to eachother, not the WTS, and if they won't speak to both of you, they don't get to speak to either of you.
Even if they don't listen to a thing you say, you'll know that you did what you felt was honorable and honest. You can feel good about that.
On tenterhooks! Let us know all the details!
Tape record it if you can. Put a recorder in your wife's purse.
I'm Serena, btw. Proud to know you.
Serena, aka StAnn
Hi Mark and welcome to the rest of your life.
Well done for doing what you're doing. Are you prepared for the shunning? Don't make the mistake that I did. I genuinely thought most of my "friends" in the truth would never treat me so unkindly, but they did. Every single one treated me like a pariah because, like you, I started going to church and was chased down by elders for it. I was left with no choice but to disassociate.
Please don't get your hopes up that the brothers wont treat you like dirt, they probably will. I made the mistake of thinking more highly of them than they deserved and my hurt and disappointment was acute, requiring councilling.
You have an opportunity now to be prepared for this. If you are, you'll do well.
Good luck!
Keep us posted. xx
