Can't speak with me, unless they need something

by Stan Conroy 69 Replies latest jw friends

• 

  Stan Conroy

  After many, many years outside of the JW world, my elderly parents finally decided to give me an ultimatum. I either rejoin the JW's or they will never speak with me again. Apparently my brother is going to get the same choice. It was a no-brainer, I chose option B.

  They offered to "study" with me, for which I agreed, if I was allowed equal time to present my case as to why there is no way the JW's have the "truth". Of course they refused that offer, as I knew they would. To be honest, it's been a long time since I've even thought about anything JW related, as is evident by the length of time since I posted here.

  Anyway, my father made a statement something along the lines of "we will no longer speak or associate with you, but I will call you if I need some physical help". I said "say what?". He says they are allowed to associate with DF'd or DA'd ones if they need some kind of help (like change a flat tire or something like that). I said "Isn't that handy". I think the sarcasm was lost on him. My wife (who never was a JW) is furious that they think they can shut me (and by extension their 3 little grandchildren) out, but still call up when they need something.

  Does anyone know if they really have a loop hole like that? Seems an awful lot like "having your cake and eating it too" so it's probably true.

  Thanks,

  Stan
• 

  asilentone

  It does not surprise me anymore, Sorry that you have to live with it.
• 

  OUTLAW

  Sounds about right..Shut them out of your life..That will drive them crazy........They can see how it feels..................LOL!!...OUTLAW
• 

  I quit!

  A while back someone posted an article from a recent WT that said something to the effect that it was not OK for a witness to help a family member that had left the "truth" but that it was OK for a witness who needed assistance to accept help from a family member that was no longer Witness. Perhaps that was the article they had in mind when they spoke with you. Pretty warped reasoning but what else would you expect for the WT.
• 

  reniaa

  they are allowed to associate for necessary family business which would include keeping in contact with grandkids. It feels like theyare being overly strict according to your words.

  All of this only applies if you are disfellowshiped if you aren't then they are being very strict because we are allowed to associate with non-witnesses just have to be careful not to be drawn into unbiblical actions.
• 

  John Doe

  we are allowed

  Think about your phrasing here for just a sec renaia.
• 

  avishai

  they are allowed to associate for necessary family business which would include keeping in contact with grandkids.

  HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH. Yeah, someone wants to shun me, they don't get to talk to my kids, period. Extremely unhealthy example for little ones "Gee, I'll let Grandma and Grandpa shit all over me because they say I'm "bad" Meanwhile, I'll let them submarine me and tell my kids that I, and my kids by extension, will die a horrible death if I don't believe EXACTLY LIKE THEM!" Yeah, no effin way, over my dead body.
• 

  slimboyfat

  It makes me angry that people can come out with statements like this and think they are being "righteous". It doesn't even meet the standards of everyday decency.
• 

  quietlyleaving

  sorry but I've taken off this post as it reveal too much.
• 

  avishai

  Man, I can't say what to do in your situation, QL, but you were'nt forced to do anything unless they had a gun to your head. It's your choice. If someone form a religious org. told me to cancel any relative's flight, the least they would get is a laugh in their face. If you are a grown man, it's none of their goddamn business.