What can a divorced woman in her forties expect if she stays in the WT?

by dgp 40 Replies latest jw friends

  • dgp
    dgp

    People, another question from me. I thank everyone in advance for their posts.

    I know this is a difficult question, and perhaps one no one can answer. But, let me post it anyways. If you were a divorced woman in your forties, with your children grown and gone, what could you expect if you stayed in the WT? By this I mean something like "I would expect to live alone the rest of my life", "I would rebuild my life very easily", "I would move", et cetera. I am not trying to get the answers I would like to hear, but just to give you people an idea of what I mean with this question.

    Thank you.

  • choosing life
    choosing life

    It depends on what you are looking for in life. If you want a husband, the odds are not in your favor. Not many chances for that unless you are willing to look outside the religion and take the heat for dating/marrying a "worldly" guy.

    If you totally want to start over and don't mind moving away, you could disappear and make your life whatever you want it to be.

  • Finally-Free
    Finally-Free

    In my 20 years as a JW I only recall one woman over 35 getting married to a JW, and he was in his 70s. The rest either stayed single or found "worldly" husbands.

    The female JWs outnumber the males, so the pickings are slim.

    W

  • OnTheWayOut
    OnTheWayOut

    How can we answer that? Are the grown children dubs or never-dubs? Did they get baptized? What happened to the husband? Is he an ex or deceased? Is he important in the organization? Was he the guilty party in a divorce or what?

    Those are important questions to know why such a person would have certain expectations.

    I mean, if this woman in her 40's is a smoking hot lesbian whose former elder husband died and left her with enough life insurance to retire early, she has a good chance of finding much happiness in the congregation. If she wants to stick by the rules, she has a good chance of being miserable but she might do it for her dubbie kids.

  • highdose
    highdose

    i have seen many women in this situation, they never find a JW hubby, they find themselves socail outcasts and are left out of every socail gathering. ages 40-50 they tend to live in hope that this will change... 50+ they realise it won't and either surcome to one of the jw illnesses ( M.E, Depression etc etc) or they leave the JW's and try to rebuild their lives

  • purplesofa
    purplesofa

    I was a divorced woman in my 40's in the organization.

    I found that going to all the meetings was most important for any kind of social life.

    and I did. Dated a few brothers, but for the most part life was lonely.

    I did befriend a couple and did alot of things with them and had married GF's.

    But, by the time you are in your 40's its a religion that is better to be married IMO

    esp if your kids are not in the truth.

    I had a very loving congo and was well liked, but still I felt very single.

    purps

  • independent_tre
    independent_tre

    I agree with purps and choosing life... pickings are slim in the org, it can be hard for a woman in her 20's let alone 40's. I've known many a sister that waited and waited, years - but are still single to this day

  • mkr32208
    mkr32208

    If you hot you might get picked up, otherwise you will soon be a woman in your 50's alone, then 60's then 70's etc...

    Of course you might get a bit of that cougar action on the side for a few years! Hard to say...

  • dissed
    dissed

    With few available brothers, the chances are if they want to get married to a JW it won't happen.

    I've only known a few to get married. All three were friends of mine and their spouses died of cancer.

    Not having good social places to meet without chaparones, it makes it even more difficult.

    Then they have to deal with the gossip if they DO have an interest in someone. Others like to judge all their actions as either too aggressive or whats wrong with them?

    JW's are so guilty of being this way.

    I used to feel so sorry for these misplaced ones in the JW organisation. Not that they needed any pity from me, but they were often misunderstood and left out.

  • bobld
    bobld

    Depends on why she got divorced.If it was on the elders recomandations she would be a saint and used at C.A.,SAD.D.O. as an example to the B.D. sheep.

    Bob

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