White Dove, may I ask if you are woman? Sorry.
Would you be shattered if your mate had sex with someone else? Why?
by goldensky 68 Replies latest watchtower beliefs
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pirata
Promises made. Promises broken. When you marry you vow to be loyal to one another. Most reasonably assume that by default, loyalty to a marriage mate includes sex. If that vow is broken, of course it will cause hurt feelings. If you feel otherwise, you better discuss it BEFORE making that vow to see if your partner would agree with that.
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snowbird
I think polygamy has its merits.
Sylvia
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carla
I get what you are saying and I guess I could eventually forgive a one nighter but never an emotional attachment. There was a study done years ago (forgive my memory here) where they put electrodes on men & women to measure brain waves (or whatever) and then showed pictures of random men & women having sexual relations-they were told to imagine it was their mate/significant other- the men's brains went crazy and the womens not so much- they were then shown pictures of people having intimate conversation where there was obvious love (at least to a womans point of view) and to then imagine it was their mate/SO and the women's brains showed much more activity than the mens! Guess the old adage 'men give love to get sex and women give sex to get love' has some merit?
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cyberjesus
to maintain the "oneness" throughout a lifetime
I do that... I just dont do it with the same person :-)
lying is cheating. doing things in my back is cheating. thats all. as long as i know and its safe for both of us is not cheating. (it doesnt mean I would like it) but at least is not cheating.
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Mad Sweeney
Here's a possible monkey wrench:
What if the entire concept is less about right and wrong and more about possessiveness and ego? It isn't that "she cheated" it is that "she cheated ON ME."
Men, ask yourselves: What if the shoe was on the other foot, which it often is? What if she cheated WITH ME, ON HIM (whoever that guy might be)? Would I hold her in the same contempt? Why not? A cheater's a cheater right? From what I've seen that's not the case; many happily married couples are THE RESULT of one of them cheating WITH their current spouse ON a previous partner.
The above could also probably apply to women but since I'm not one, I'm not even going to attempt to project. Perhaps a female could comment on the applicability.
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carla
I know a number of couples who became couples after they cheated on a spouse. All were men who cheated with the new honey and then divorced the old model. ALL the new honey's have severe trust issues now! Go figure! They do not entirely trust their new found prize and keep a very tight leash or make life difficult when the husband wants be away from them for even a short while. And why wouldn't they feel like that? They know full well how the cheater operated and cheated on a wife of many years why wouldn't they do the same to them? I can't say that any of the couples I know are 'happily' married, they seem to be more accepting of the situation rather than thinking they finally found their true soulmate. Though these couples are middle age to older so... maybe with age you just figure 'aww hell, I ain't going through a divorce and all that nonsense again' ... who knows?
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nugget
Yes. If he has that much time on his hands there are things he could be doing around the house.
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Think About It
Shattered....No. Surprised....Yes.
Think About It
