by flipper 85 Replies latest jw friends
Na.....she's so full of shit she's obviously from Uranus.
Flipper send me your address so I can send you a sympathy card
for being married to this moron for 19 years......Mary
LOL@MARY!!..
Mary I stole you a Cool "Borg Watchtower"..
You can keep "Silly Twats" in it!!
................................ ...OUTLAW
I feel for the kids. Even the witness daughters. I don't see any love from their Mom for who they are, it's all what they do for the WTBTS that she approves of..
I didn't see any love at all for the son in that letter..
Even tho I often heard 'I love you' I remember the feeling of rejection from my JW hubby and his JW Mom and family each time they told me how their god was more important to them than I was..after all, I didn't offer them the 'Hope' (not a sure thing) of everlasting life. Not being with them means you are against them (to them). I was going to be destroyed .
They were always making plans for the future that didn't include me, I wouldn't be around apparantly. They were going to live happily ever after ..
They can be so cruel sometimes...sigh......(including your wife)
Snoozy said:
I don't see any love from their Mom for who they are, it's all what they do for the WTBTS that she approves of..
Unconditional love is when, despite all they do for the WTBS that you disapprove of, you love them anyway. This is the relationship you're describing with your daughters. Good for you, and also for your son!
OUTLAW- From the responses of my son's mom it sounds like she didn't bother to read his E-mail at all. I mean her retention level was absolute zero. She didn't address anything my son had written her. Don't think she is an escaped mental patient- they'd be more sane.
MARY- Yeah, it was pretty lonely being married to her for 19 years. I felt like I was married to a child actually. She is so cult mind control she can't see where the WT society stops and she starts. In her mind- she IS the WT society, the GB , and the body of elders all wrapped into one person.
SNOOZY- I do feel very sorry for my JW daughters that their mom's love for them is based on how well they do in the JW cult. That's why I try to send them pictures of family to help them remember how important "real family " is. And there was an evident lack of love in her E-mail to my son for sure. It's a good thing my son has my wife and I
What an excellent thought provoking email he wrote.....Yeah Flipper Junior
WOW!
great letter. She should be proud not sad.
It seems to me that she has lost sight of the fact that the parents role is to raise the child till it can be independant and hopefully along the way nurture a good moral compass.
She has done her job well, as have you mr flipper. The difference is that you see that, your son sees that, she does not.
what she is doing is no different to the parent that pushes a child into a career that it does not want... i'm a doctor and you damn well will be too...
all the best... i wonder what reply she will make?
oz
Your other sister just got a call and her husband has a part in the Drama at the District convention. I guess you would probably not want to have nothing to do with coming.
So true, but I love how she manages to spin it in her mind toward a "hatred." I mean, if someone's close relative was getting married in a church, something a whole lot more important than lip-synching in a costume with a fake beard, she wouldn't go near the place.
We have training for the building of the Kingdom Halls, Regional Building Committee has just called me and asked me to take care of organizing 85 hot meals through our congregation this Saturday at noon.
She left out "....at our own expense." The organization burdens members and calls it privileges. If your son organized 85 meals for the homeless, she would scoff at his efforts, but she'll get them for 85 people with homes and jobs that could pay for it and thinks that gets Jehovah's seal of approval.
Yes son - it's a real privilege to serve with over 7 million brothers and sisters around the world, not going to war to kill each other- all our meetings have exact same information, word for word, from the Bible, every week- truly a worldwide ( mind control cult ) organization.
Such another spin. The exact same information and the war thing are her cry of "unity." "Conformity" works just as well. Or "turning off our brains and letting others tell us everything" works just as good.
Flipper, I needed a drink after reading your ex-wife's response to your son's letter.
There are letters I cannot read from my mom that make me feel like I was punched in the gut. One time she used the scripture about Jehovah being "hurt in his heart" before the flood, and she said to me "do you want to hurt Jehovah's heart." Made me was to throw up.
As we chatted about yesterday (did we talk yesterday or the day before?), we are all doing the best we can under the circumstances. It's frustrating in the very least to be talked to in that manner...but it is what it is. It is great how your son handled it and understands the dynamics. Some JW's will never understand...it's a strange sort of mix arrogance and self-flaggelation that keeps a good percentage bubble-headed. **sigh**
xx
Been working all night last night- have time to respond now. Thanks.
GL TIREBITER- It definitely is " conditional " love that my son's mom and his sisters show him. It's truly ridiculous- my son and I act more Christian than THEY do- and they claim to be christians > Weird.
HOPE 4 OTHERS- Thanks. I too thought my son wrote an inspiring E-mail as well. Too bad his mom didn't think so.
AUSSIE OZ- Good point you make that my ex-wife can't see what a good son she has and that she DID do a good job- or my son wouldn't have turned out so well and is a respectful young man. Of course I'd like to think I had a good influence too to help his critical thinking ability- that being said his mom does try to " fit " him into a round hole- like trying to place a sqare peg into a round hole. She gets very judmental.
OTWO- His mom does really stretch the facts in saying my son has " hatred " for them and the witnesses. Pretty ridiculous. It was a very loving, thoughtful letter. Good point my ex-wife won't get a penny for serving those meals - but it puts her name up in lights- and she likes that. She tells him it proves they have unity because all the meetings go on at the same time with the same information. It just shows they are all to conform to cultlike sameness.
DAGNEY- Yeah, I think we talked yesterday, my son did a good job of staying respectful to his mom , but it's hard when she doesn't return that respect to him and tells him he " hates " the witnesses . Witnesses do have a certain arrogance about them in which they always think they are right- even when they're wrong. As you said- all we can do is keep on trying to be the bigger person and show authentic human caring- in spite of their cult paranoia. Thanks, Peace out, Mr. Flipper
From the responses of my son's mom it sounds like she didn't bother to read his E-mail at all. I mean her retention level was absolute zero. She didn't address anything my son had written her. Don't think she is an escaped mental patient- they'd be more sane.
She isn't the only one with that problem. With any of my family, I have to keep very tight control on any religious conversation we have. I have to keep it to one subject. Preferably one sentence, put as a question not as a statement. From then on it is a psychological battle to make them take ownership of the problem with their doctrine and put a stop to efforts to fault me for asking the question.
I try to make them feel guilty for not answering my question, using examples that they have given me to define other religious leaders/members as corrupt and led astray by the devil. I express my disappointment in them that they should behave in this manner.
Any attempt to change the subject is treated the same way.
My first rule of engagement is; Never tell a JW anything that they didn't already know and/or don't have on a bookshelf/computer/official JW website where it can be accessed immediately, so that they can't illegitimately weasel their way out of it by pretending they don't teach/behave/rule/whatever as you described, or have an excuse to put off the conversation so that they can 'look into it', which they never do.
My second rule is to pose anything you want them to consider as a question. One question. They simply cannot/will not process two.
None of this has resulted in a deconversion yet, but it does keep them off my back. They want to put up the appearance of being good Christians so they don't shun me, but trying their guilt tricks on me is becoming a rare event.
Cheers
Chris
