I read the first post and skimmed the rest, so I apologize if someone said what I am trying to say already...
First: I really like, and agree, with what Leolaia says here:
People obey laws and give themselves to their communities and give their lives to help others regardless of what theistic beliefs they do or do not have. Psychopaths, sexual predators, cheats like Bernie Madoff, etc. are the kind of people that today say in their hearts "there is no God" in the same sense intended by the psalmist.
In the Bible Jesus gives us two commandments: 1) to love God with all your heart, soul, might and 2) to love your neighbor as yourself. For me: I believe God exists and he is there whether a person believes in God or not. God is inside all of His creation. And to think of that really the first commandment (which is really hard to do even for a theist) is the same/explained or clarified by the second commandment. Further to love your neighbor as yourself presupposes that we love ourselves. So, in my way of thinking: if people are loving others then they are in good terms with God. If people are acting unkind or hateful then they are not. Basically: it is more important how we act. What we believe can form how we act (every deed was first conceived as a thought)... however in the end it is what we do that defines us. (I think I'm quoting a batman movie now...)
I also feel: if people do not come to church what is it about church they do not like? If people don't want to be Christian, what is it about Christians that they do not like? Instead of seeing the atheist in the wrong, what are the theists doing wrong that make Christianity so unappealing? If we represent God, how are we misrepresenting him that people don't want anything to do with Him?
Reading your post, brotherdan, I can see that it was well intentioned, however, from another Christian's perspective: it DOES have a condescending tone. If I were an atheist I would not want to talk to you. You escape saying "hey, it's not me who says this, it is the Bible..." but you are putting it into context. It is good to remember the story of The Good Samaritan. A man needed help on the day that happened to be the Sabbath. Holy Men passed the man who needed help and did not help him because they too escaped the loving responsibility by hiding behind the law: can't work on the Sabbath. It was a man who wasn't holy, who didn't follow the religious practices at all, a Samaritan (which was highly controversial person in the story) who didn't have the Jewish Laws who stopped to help.
I saw Terry and VoidEater act in what I consider a Christian matter saying you are entitled to believe what you want, let's have peace.
Anyway, thats how I see it. I don't think you were intentionally condescending, but we have to stop and think of your audience. You know who will read it. Are you acting how Jesus would? Is it really welcoming conversation? Or is it telling them who is wrong? I'm sure I am condescending often, it is easy to do when we feel we know what is right. I think it is wonderful that you bring a Christian perspective... I'm here with you on that - we just have to remember that when we say we are Christians who we are representing and how we can bring people closer to Him or drive them further away from Him.
God Bless you.